I'd like feedback on my article: Traditional wooden house accommodation...

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  1. Shrouds profile image66
    Shroudsposted 12 months ago

    Hi Hubbers,

    What else sould I do to make it featured?

    I'd like some help with passing the Quality Assessment Process. Will you please give feedback on my article Traditional wooden house accommodation complete your journey in Langkawi Malaysia (must be signed in to view). What can I do to improve? Thanks!

    1. theraggededge profile image98
      theraggededgeposted 12 months agoin reply to this

      Hi smile

      Two things - titles and subtitles should be in title case... Google it.

      Always a space after a period/ full stop.

      Okay, there's a third - do you think anyone will be searching for 'breathtaking memory'? If not, then those two words are not necessary. How about "Visit to Langkawi Island, Malaysia" Boring, I know, but more likely that people will be searching for it.

      Still a lot of grammar problems. Can you get someone to proofread and correct for you?

      1. Shrouds profile image66
        Shroudsposted 12 months agoin reply to this

        Thanks again,I just submit for 3rd times,If not approve I will follow your advice for the title.I still do not get what is the problem of my grammar,is it only about space,comma or more than that maybe my word or sentence.

  2. pen promulgates profile image56
    pen promulgatesposted 12 months ago

    Hi
    I could find grammar issues right from the second line. Rearrange 'says that' to 'that says'
    Some other corrections in the first paragraph:
    Remove the period after clothes and put a comma. Clothes, children, shoes, and other stuff is the right form.
    The phrase 'put inside bags and' is vague and doesn't relate to the sentence above it. 
    Remove through after started browsing. Just keep it I started browsing.
    Remove the period after etc. The question mark is enough.

    In the second paragraph:
    Put a comma before but.
    It's memories keep refreshing not memories keeps refreshing.
    It's my family didn't reject my plans not my planned.
    Before among put one, so it should be one among the best places to visit..
    Put when before even. The right form is 'the surrounding looked new to me even when I have been here before.'
    'everything looks so convenience for peoples to start with.' is a wrong statement.
    'The developed Air Asia airport first captured my eyes, bigger departures, more seat, more rent a car booth, - there should be a period after eyes. Continue the statement by writing' 'They have big departures, more seats, and more rent a car booth.
    It should be 'to start with, everything looks very convenient for people.'

    Third paragraph:
    There should be that before waited.
    'After thanking him for the nice service that the rent a car has provided' is grammatically incorrect.
    'After thanking him for the nice service that the rent a car had provided. Is the right form.

    Like this there are many grammatical errors throughout the article. That's why it will have much trouble getting featured.

    Please proofread the article.
    There are many punctuation errors too.
    Use apps like Grammarly. It will correct most of the errors in your writing.

    Hope these help.
    Good luck.

    1. Shrouds profile image66
      Shroudsposted 12 months agoin reply to this

      Thanks a lot,that was really a big help!I will try to get someone for proofreading!

 
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