I'd like feedback on my article: Is the MBA still a worthwhile graduate degree?

  1. Brianlnathans profile image55
    Brianlnathansposted 7 years ago

    Hi Hubbers,

    I'd like some help with passing the Quality Assessment Process. Will you please give feedback on my article Is the MBA still a worthwhile graduate degree? (must be signed in to view). What can I do to improve? Thanks!

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    1. theraggededge profile image82
      theraggededgeposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      Hi there,

      Your title and subtitles need to be in title case.

      Image capsules shouldn't have subtitles.

      Your first sentence is very long and 'tentatively increase their salaries' is an odd phrase. Also not sure why you have enclosed 'increase' in inverted commas? You've also used the words 'professionals' and 'many' twice each. Can you make that sentence shorter and crisper. It's your only chance to keep your reader reading.

      Go through the whole article and weed out unnecessary words. For example, "Looking at the tuition at a high end business schools like Stanford and Harvard, a prospective candidate is expected to spend up to close to $120,000 per year."

      "The tuition fees for Stanford and Harvard run to around $120,000 per year." Look how many words that cut out, and it said the same thing. More words does not equal better writing.

      You should beware of rewriting topics that have been well-covered by others. This sort of article is all over the internet. Why bother competing when you could write about an interesting topic from your own experience? How about how you survived the MBA course? Or what advice could you give to others taking on the MBA? That sort of thing.

      Good luck.

      replyreport
      1. Brianlnathans profile image55
        Brianlnathansposted 7 years agoin reply to this

        Great advice, I will effect these suggestions. Thanks a lot.

        replyreport
 
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