I hate being made to feel dumb

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   lynnechandlerposted 13 years ago

   that is all now back to our regularly scheduled programing.

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   Crazdwriterposted 13 years ago

   Lynne that isn't all...what's up?

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   Nelle Hoxieposted 13 years ago

   I agree being made to feel dumb feels bad. But I do feel that way on a regular basis. There is so much to know in the world, and we can't know everything. So I just try to take it in stride and learn something new everyday.

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   Uninvited Writerposted 13 years ago

   I don't let people make me feel dumb

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   lynnechandlerposted 13 years ago

   Aw, look at the kitty. CW I love the avi.
   
   Just having a bad day is all. Comment my mother said this morning hit me all the wrong way.

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      prettydarkhorseposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      hi Lynne, oh come on, forget her remarks, you know that youre not like that at all,

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      Janettaposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      mothers are good at that

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   Crazdwriterposted 13 years ago

   Oh lynne I'm sorry chica. Yea mom's sometimes do say the things that end up being completely rude and wrong. mine does it sometimes but doesn't eralize it I don't think.
   
   *HUGS*
   
   You are a vrey beautiful intelligent woman!
   
   and thanks that is my next pet I swear! I want a lion! lmao

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   lynnechandlerposted 13 years ago

   Sorry, probably shouldn't have posted but it pretty much ruined my day and my mood. It's one thing to beat yourself up because you haven't been able to find a job in over a year but then to have your own mother tell you that you need to start thinking about fast food or other minimally skilled jobs because obviously you don't have the skills for the jobs you have been applying for to get hired.
   
   I mean yes it would be a job and it would be income but I'm 46 years old so it is damn hard to find a job let alone someone to hire you at this age. It is my one biggest fear about re-entering school. I will have to graduate and pass the boards before I will be hireable and I won't finish up until after my 50th birthday.

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      Crazdwriterposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      aaaa lynne sweety I'm 26 and can't find a job in my field. it's not just you...I've had huge breaks in between my last two jobs only having worked for maybe 6 months while in Hawaii...the last preschool I worked at was only being 4 months long. it's this damn economy that is screwing everyone over. people who have jobs are clinging to them for dear life while those who don't have jobs are scrambling to find one.
      
      And your mom was definitely WRONG to say that! Keep looking for the job YOU want, don't listen to her. it's your life and you want to be happy in your job. Screw what ppl say about money and all that. Money does make the world go round but a great fun job is what makes YOU want to work and makes YOU happy. I know this because I had one other job before I got into teaching at a preschool and I hated it!
      
      Don't feel too discourage, Lynne. when the time is right you will find the right job for you. Just keep looking like I am and don't let what your mom say bring you down. You have me and what I say is more important!
      
      You can't find a job because YOUR job isn't there just yet.

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      prettydarkhorseposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      Iunderstand where you are coming from, but you know what you can do it Ms. Lynne, I studied my post grad with four children in tow and my ex hubby didnt helped at all, I did it all through determination, and surely things will be different if yuo finished your college, for the meantime, will it be difficult for you to get service kind of job>>

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      rebekahELLEposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      I think your mom wasn't trying to hurt you, she probably feels frustrated for you also and sometimes the words come out wrong.
      there are so many out of work now, don't beat yourself up, it's a tough job market. stay positive and shake it off and keep moving forward.

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   lynnechandlerposted 13 years ago

   It isn't like I don't have skills, I do. I have a certificate of dental assisting, I have worked in banking, done secretarial work, etc but for the 6 years I have been in real estate. I went inactive back in 08 because of the market and took a retail job which both my parents chided me for and then I got hurt on the job helping move an entertainment center out to a truck for delivery.
   
   The company had no workers comp benefits so I lost my job when I had to stay out of work to heal. Since then I have applied for every opening I was qualified for and have only had one interview. My parents knew people that worked there and when they lost my first application caused a scene and I'm actually really surprised after that I got an interview but alas no job. First impressions and all that jazz.
   
   So, I have skills and yes I guess I could take a service job, but I was really trying to hold out until I got back in school before I picked up a job so I could see what the course load was going to be like.

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      prettydarkhorseposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      Oh ok I see..i have a feeling you have a plan already, and hope things will be easier as you go along the way...

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   Crazdwriterposted 13 years ago

   well I say lynne to keep looking...like I said don't give up for a job that you are qualified and if you want to go back to school then do it...maybe even do it all online...might help some with the work load

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    cosetteposted 13 years ago

    Lynne....don't let one comment by your mom trickle down and poison everything, including your excitement about school.
    
    just shrug and say 'well, that's your opinion now isn't it' then forget about it!
    
    you've got a lot of good skills and experience there! your world will open up when you sit at your desk in that classroom for the first time. don't look at it as four long years of hard work with uncertainty at the end. see it for what it is -  an incredible opportunity that you are creating just for you, and think about all of the wonderful things you will learn and how you will continue to grow and build on every achievement.
    
    i stopped letting people make me feel bad a few years ago. don't give anyone that power over you or your feelings.
    
    you're going to be just fine.

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    europewalkerposted 13 years ago

    Lynne,ignore it. Moms will be moms. We all have days like that. I let it go in one ear and out the other. They can't help themselves! You are in charge of your life,not her.

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    jdaviswritesposted 13 years ago

    It's a shame there are so many qualified people and willing to work people, including myself. I think right now, any job is a good job to have...but never loose focus of what you really want to do. Even if it takes more years, more money, more schooling whatever. Life is short so try not to worry about what your mom says. Thats all.

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    The Ropeposted 13 years ago

    Lynne, I've come to realize that half of the learning we get from going to college is in the tenacity and focus we learn, not necessarily in the subject matter.  Stay strong!  Your life is about you and at our age, we've earned the right to make our decisions.  It's a mother's prerogative to be negative, It's our right to ignore it.

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    rmcrayneposted 13 years ago

    Wow ladies, what great posts.  Lots of love here.

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    lynnechandlerposted 13 years ago

    Thank you all for your positive comments and words of encouragement. I thought I had gained a measure of self-esteem back over the last few years but after this morning I guess not, lol.
    
    Anyhow, I really do appreciate all the positive feedback here. You guys are really great.
    
    I love my mother and father unconditionally but sometimes they really know how to make me feel really inadequate and less than capable of wiping my own tush.
    
    I'm going to have to do some thinking on this one, I have spent the last 28 yrs doing what everyone else thought was right trying to please them and not myself. It's time for me now. I've raised my babies and it for the most part is just me at home. I do still have one child here but that will be only until the mid of Jan so this should be my time.

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    Crazdwriterposted 13 years ago

    Time for you to please yourself and make yourself happy. stop listening to others...except for us of course giving you good advice lol and do what YOU want from now on lynne! It's YOUR life YOU make yourself happy by doing what you want to.
    
    Good luck chica and if you ever want to rant, go to my page and hit contact and email me.

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    cosetteposted 13 years ago

    It's My Turn (with lyrics)

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    lynnechandlerposted 13 years ago

    Thanks CW I may have to take you up on that one.
    
    Cosette that is a really great song. TY

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    Crazdwriterposted 13 years ago

    Hey that is what I am here for... to help others if they need it. go ahead and flood my email if you need

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    lynnechandlerposted 13 years ago

    I won't flood you, usually I keep all this bottled up, lol. I have a little box I stick them in and most times when I close the box I can let it go, today I couldn't.

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       Crazdwriterposted 13 years agoin reply to this

       Don't keep it bottled up or you'll end up like me girlie. trust me I keep things bottled up and I am defintely messed up because of it. So email me anytime!

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    Uninvited Writerposted 13 years ago

    The last time I was unemployed and looking for a job in my field I applied for over 85 jobs and got 3 interviews, before I finally got a job almost a year later. And the economy was good then. Don't give up hope

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    Cagsilposted 13 years ago

    I thought long and hard about the topic, before I decided to comment. Now, I know- I'm not the smartest or brightest person on the planet, but what I do know is not about being smart or dumb.
    
    No one is ever stupid or dumb. Yes, some of their actions can make you think that they are dumb, but what you consider dumb is subjective according to your own moral judgement of yourself.
    
    If you can't see yourself doing it, you are most likely to consider it dumb or stupid, just for happening.
    
    The REASON for people doing dumb or stupid things is because of a lack of knowledge and understanding of life. Since, they do not understand life, they stumble forward through each trial and error episode that happens. They learn very little because they do not know what to look for. They think they understand life, just because they are living it and have their experience to tell themselves what they need. When in fact they know nothing compared to what they really need to know.
    
    Those who make judgement of someone being dumb or stupid, automatically points the finger back to himself/herself, about their own intellect and reveals that they are not too bright themselves, but feel the need to impose their own ego to justify their own inadequatecy.
    
    In the end, it shows people really don't understand what it means to be a human being.

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