Wrote a new hub this afternoon, just for fun. It is topical, relating to a new news item today. Would someone like to read it in it's entirety and comment, please? Pretty please? I don't usually do 'satire' if that is what it could be described as, should I leave it as it is, or go a bit further over the top?
Can you link to which hub it is? I checked your profile, but I'm not sure which hub to read!
I liked your profile though, sounds like a very interesting life. I, too, just recently joined here because I love writing but have been away from it for many, many years. Hoping to brush up on some old skills and learn a lot of new ones about writing online.
Welcome to hubpages...LOL...like I'm an oldtimer!
Sorry the link is
Ok, I'm not great at criticism, but I'll try and turn off the "obsessed with being liked" button and do some constructive points here.
First of all, I think its a nice first attempt at this style. Although, I think I might call it sarcasm, or skepticism, rather than satire. (Not a bad thing, though, its good to look at serious subjects with a sense of humor - and, I personally, am a huge fan of sarcasm.)
The first few topics could use a little revision, I think. At first, I wasn't sure where you were going with this and you just came off as kind of negative. I think you really got into your groove around the banning of beans category. That's when I started to realize that this was intentionally humorous. I might expand your first paragraph to help illustrate the intent of the article. A reader sometimes adjusts better to a certain style if they know what to expect. (I think I would have found your first few segments more amusing and less negative if I realized the tone of your piece.)
The comment about the 83% (instead of 80, or 85) might be a good place to give the reader a taste of what is to come. That was funny! (Maybe expand a little, giving your take on what percent will come from each industry or person? Ex. - "I can only assume that the breakdown will be as follows considering the specific 83% dictum. Automakers 1%, Big Oil 1%, Government 1%, average American household 80%." or something.
Other than that, good for you for trying something new! I definitely laughed quite a few of your comments. Good luck!
You have definitely given me the encouragement I need to go back and change a few things, like you suggested. And thanks for the comments.
I didn't know where the hub was going either until I got to the bean column because I just sat down and threw it out really quickly, but you're right, I should go back and lighten the whole tone of the hub from the start.
Now comes the HARD work! LOL
OK I've made some changes which I hope will make the hub look better:)
by Jackie Lynnley 3 years ago
Do you ever bite yourself?I mean accidentally of course on the inside of your mouth or your tongue? I hate when I do that and it is not due to eating like a ravenous dog; though I do have sharp incisor teeth, I do take my time eating; but still it happens out of the blue. Does this happen to you?
by Jessie Watson 8 months ago
"A naturalists life would be a happy one if he had only to observe, and never to write" - Charlie D.
by Dave Mathews 7 years ago
I am sick and tired of homosexuals crying for equal rights.The Judeo-Christian faiths believe according to their religious Holy Scripture whether that be the Torah, or the Holy Bible, that homosexuality is an abomination before Almighty God. In other words it is a sin punishable by God.Even Islam...
by hubchief - pen name 9 years ago
people, i have volunteered to reseach on correlation between age distribution vs hub contents. Could you please visit my age profile hub and vote on your own age profile. The clicks are all anonymous to me (I think hubstaff knows where to find the data as they would not allow you to vote twice)I am...
by freefogging 5 years ago
I have lately been much more active on HP. Fixing articles that needed updating and adding pics and modules to the ones that were lacking. I have Hubhopped and even commented on other writers articles. I have asked and answered questions.I have only earned about 0.80 cents this month. Really, what...
by Lgali 10 years ago
My profile name is related to my place lahri gali where i was born
Copyright © 2018 HubPages Inc. and respective owners. Other product and company names shown may be trademarks of their respective owners. HubPages® is a registered Service Mark of HubPages, Inc. HubPages and Hubbers (authors) may earn revenue on this page based on affiliate relationships and advertisements with partners including Amazon, Google, and others.
|HubPages Device ID||This is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.|
|Login||This is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.|
|HubPages Traffic Pixel||This is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.|
|Remarketing Pixels||We may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.|
|Conversion Tracking Pixels||We may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.|