I'd like feedback on my article: Waking up to Failure Every Day.

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  1. profile image0
    Ivan Hernandezposted 7 years ago

    I would like help with improving my article.

    https://hubpages.com/literature/Waking- … -Every-Day

    Can you help me? Thank you in advance.

    1. theraggededge profile image84
      theraggededgeposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      No. Even the title is too depressing smile

      Like the rhymes though.

      1. profile image0
        Ivan Hernandezposted 7 years agoin reply to this

        Thanks. This is my first poem.

  2. Mary Florence profile image66
    Mary Florenceposted 7 years ago

    Let's try, "Waking Up To Failure Every Day" instead of "Waking up to Failure Every Day".

    Capitalisation

    1. profile image0
      Ivan Hernandezposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      Thank you. I will Correct it.

  3. profile image0
    Ivan Hernandezposted 7 years ago

    How do I improve this article further?

    1. theraggededge profile image84
      theraggededgeposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      It's not an article, it's a poem, so you have it how you like it. It's your creation and as long as the spelling is okay, then it should be fine. Is there a poetry category to put it under?

      1. profile image0
        Ivan Hernandezposted 7 years agoin reply to this

        2-line poems. Actually, no. There isn't. What do you call 2-line poetries?

        1. theraggededge profile image84
          theraggededgeposted 7 years agoin reply to this

          Stanzas? I don't know much about poetry.

          1. profile image0
            Ivan Hernandezposted 7 years agoin reply to this

            I made a stanza, but there's no category for Stanza.

            I rearranged the poem into a stanza.

            1. profile image0
              Ivan Hernandezposted 7 years agoin reply to this

              I've rearranged the poem into a sonnet: A 14-line poem. 3 rows of 4 lines each and 2 lines at the end followed by a note at the end.

  4. eugbug profile image66
    eugbugposted 7 years ago

    Is this autobiographical?

    1. profile image0
      Ivan Hernandezposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      Yes, but It's an autobiographical poetry. What do you call that?

      1. eugbug profile image66
        eugbugposted 7 years agoin reply to this

        I don't know. What do you define as failure?

        1. profile image0
          Ivan Hernandezposted 7 years agoin reply to this

          Not accomplishing your goals. Letting yourself be negative. Having medicine. Having no chance at independence.

          1. theraggededge profile image84
            theraggededgeposted 7 years agoin reply to this

            Well you accomplished writing some poetry. How many people do that? Not many.

            1. profile image0
              Ivan Hernandezposted 7 years agoin reply to this

              I made a sonnet. Come check.

          2. eugbug profile image66
            eugbugposted 7 years agoin reply to this

            Well you learned to walk and read and write. They're all achievements and successes. Success doesn't have to be composed of wondrous achievements. Life is all about baby steps and not so baby steps and positive mental attitude.

  5. theraggededge profile image84
    theraggededgeposted 7 years ago

    Do you know what the best bit is?

    This: "Erick Hernandez rarely writes poetry, but when he does, it is a masterpiece."

    I love it big_smile

    1. profile image0
      Ivan Hernandezposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      Thank you. That's why It's going to Letterpile. As soon as my 14 days expires, I can publish it.

  6. theraggededge profile image84
    theraggededgeposted 7 years ago

    Could you write another poem?

    Finding happiness in the small things? You know, like breakfast, or TV, or your HP friends?

 
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