I'd like feedback on my article: ATTRACTING TEENAGER

1. 77

   OGUNDARE OLUSEGUNposted 5 years ago

   Hi Hubbers,
   
   I'd like some help with passing the Quality Assessment Process. Will you please give feedback on my article? What can I do to improve? Thanks!
   Here is my article: ATTRACTING TEENAGER (must be signed in to view)

   replyreport
   1. 96

      theraggededgeposted 5 years agoin reply to this

      Forgive me, but is this about a teacher becoming romantically involved with one of his students?
      
      He'd be jailed in the US or UK these days. Not a good premise for a story on HubPages.
      
      The title is also questionable. It will never be approved.

      replyreport
      1. 77

         OGUNDARE OLUSEGUNposted 5 years agoin reply to this

         Thanks for this.
         If you read the story very well you will see that the man was not from the inception showing love to the naive girl though the naive girl was showing signs of interest.
         Then in this part of the world, Nigeria, the concept of marriage is based on a man being older than the woman. That is why you will read about the wide age gaps in marriage here probably unlike in your end where such hardly happens...I am though not sure.
         But here, it takes time for a man to become settled...That is the concept here it is in no way promoting illicit affairs with teenager nor immature girls or ladies. You may go through the content again, but not the title alone before arriving at conclusion.
         Approving my post is not a must by you nor the management, but I am painting the picture of what happens here, as well as other parts of the world even if not in your country.
         Thank you for this.
         I am very grateful.

         replyreport
         1. 94

            CYong74posted 5 years agoin reply to this

            I think you do not understand how this platform works. Theraggededge is not the person who approves your article. She is a writer herself and purely replying to your request for help.
            
            In the world of writing, offline or online, it is the writer's duty to ensure things like title aren't misleading. To resort to the defense of a reader jumping to conclusions or shaded by cultural differences is lazy and frankly, amateurish.
            
            In addition to which, there are many other ways to title what you claim to be writing about. Quite honestly, "Attracting Teenager" doesn't befit your content. (I have read it) One could even consider it as pretty misleading.

            replyreport
2. 94

   CYong74posted 5 years ago

   Ineed. The title sounds like some Nambla writeup! HP will never approve that.

   replyreport