Hi Hubbers,
I'd like some help with passing the Quality Assessment Process. Will you please give feedback on my article? What can I do to improve? Thanks!
Here is my article: The Essence of Shrimad Bhagavad Gita: Unleashing Shree Krishna's Original Message! (must be signed in to view)
Hi there,
You only need to post one thread per article, otherwise advice gets muddled and lost.
I'd say to delete the links and add reputable references at the end of the article.
You need an introduction to explain to readers the purpose of the article.
The beginning reads like a blog post - I kind of lost interest because I couldn't relate to the information.
There's no such word as 'whoopingly'. 'Whoop' is a verb, not an adverb. Although it sounds like a great description to me
But, yes, too much 'I'.
Good luck.
It's a very interesting article but it might be more interesting if you gave your readers the facts and let them come to their own conclusions.You need to switch some words for others. For example, you've used the word 'whoopingly', a word I'm not sure even exists. 'As many of us know,' is unnecessary; 'Apparently, I started by peeping into the book.': the use of 'apparently' and 'peeping' don't make sense here; 'Yes, I was ardently looking for it.': 'yes' and 'ardently' don't make sense here and, in any case, the sentence is unnecessary; 'I was so happy to read this quote, as someone from outside India frankly accepted that the Bhagavad Gita is for the mankind': 'extremely' might be better than 'so', omit the comma and use 'as it meant that' instead of 'as', and leave out 'the' before 'mankind; 'It seriously made by day and increased my curiosity more to know the essence.': 'my', not 'by' and there is no need for 'more'. Happy writing. : - )
Thanks to both of you. Your feedback is valuable. Will make the suggested changes. Keep giving such feedback!
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