May I have a crumb of expert opinion on my many mistakes?

1. 81

   William Taylor Vposted 2 years ago

   My goal is to write about college level psychology concepts that someone with no awareness of psychology can learn from.  Does this paper achieve that?  And what else could I improve on (like, just something that jumps out to you)?  Thank you for your time.  https://discover.hubpages.com/education … evelopment

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   1. 84

      Miebakagh57posted 2 years agoin reply to this

      The first two or three sentence of the summary, is actuary the summary depicted. This along with the whole paragraphe should form the introduction. Put that in a seperate text capsule.                           .           Then the body of the article follows in  each text capsule. Don't forget the conclusion also in another text capsule before the reference.                                      I would like to introduce you to the  Learning Center, where you would learn the basic ropes of story writing. Click 'help' top right of your page or timeline and your're done. Then dig deeper.                         Seriously, source your photos as captured by you, or source them online at a free photo downloading sites.

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   2. 77

      chef-de-jourposted 2 years agoin reply to this

      I would recommend you read through relevant sections at the Learning Center here at HP:
      
      https://hubpages.com/help-wizard/
      
      Then study/read through some of the quality evergreen articles on the various niche sites: Dengarden, Owlcation and so on. You'll get a good idea of how to compose a decent, informative article and what works best for the online market.
      
      The more you read and learn the better chances of success.
      
      Your article:
      
      * needs to be longer, split into more accessible paragraphs/capsules and composed clearly to help guide the first-time reader through what is quite a complex subject.
      
      * definitely should have sources cited. Without references your article will not be taken seriously.
      
      * contains highly technical terms. You should include definitions to help inform the reader.
      
      * might benefit from more personal insights - your own experiences in the world of psychology?
      
      Keep writing, studying and learning. It can take time to achieve success online. I'm no expert but do know that patience, hard work and passion for a subject eventually bring rewards.

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   3. 73

      greenmindposted 2 years agoin reply to this

      The article is very dense; consider breaking it up into a handful of separate articles. Generally the more quality articles you publish here, the better you do.

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   4. 67

      OldRosesposted 2 years agoin reply to this

      Hub Pages is not a platform for publishing college papers.  It is an online magazine.  You need to read articles here first to get an idea of what types of articles are acceptable and, most importantly, how they are written.  The format of your article is not acceptable here.  You need to re-write it for lay people in the form of a magazine article.

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   5. 42

      dylananthony4uposted 2 years agoin reply to this

      Hi William. I'm just starting out here on HubPages, but maybe I can give my two cents. I read your article, and I must say that it is a really interesting topic to begin with. Maybe you can expound on it more in future parts.
      
      Your article was also very informative. Just a style suggestion: maybe break your texts into multiple paragraphs so that it's easier on the reader's eyes.

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2. 68

   PaulGoodman67posted 2 years ago

   I didn't go through it in detail, but here are some of my thoughts derived from my impressions.
   
   Rather than a "summary," which typically comes at the end, it should be more of an introduction. The actual content list is fine, but you should use it to explain what you aim to show/inform the reader, something along the lines of "this is what you'll learn from this article."
   
   Your paragraphs are way too long for the online world. Most people read on their smartphones nowadays. HubPages recommends a max of three sentences per para.
   
   As the chef says, the article overall should be longer. It's not an exact science, but I would aim for maybe 1,000 to 1,500 words. You should break it up into bite-sized pieces with subheadings, bullet points, pictures, videos, etc.
   
   I would also follow the chef's suggestions to study the learning center material and use the articles on the front pages of the HubPages niche sites as examples regarding structure and tone.
   
   In fact, everything that the chef said above is excellent advice. There's a lot to learn if you want to succeed.

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