My Inner Critic IS Raging!!

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   Rafiniposted 14 years ago

   ok, sorry, but I hafta get this off my chest...
   
   a young woman who just broke up with her bf of 5 years is already in love with someone she hasn't met face to face from an online dating service?  No.  This sounds like desperation to me.  And some people call me desperate cuz I'm willing to give my heart after a month of serious face to face dating!!  (I agree  lol  I need to take more time)
   
   there is also a thread from someone (i forget who) who joined 3 weeks ago, published 1 hub, posted 1 thread saying they are here for us to depend on re: queries and worries about our love lives?  I DONT THINK SO!!! 
   
   there are more, but this is all I can think of right now - cuz I just ran into the threads   lol  anything you want to "get off your chest"?

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      Faybe Bayposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      Yes Rafini, thanks for the opening. One posted a very depressed thread due to having no readers. I wrote a letter explaining why. Only one hub published with additions added in own comment section? so no one is getting notified of a new hub, because there is no new hub. Second letter I wrote to same hubber! I do not mind helping anyone, but to act suicidal because one does not know how it goes? and whose hubs is this person reading? For if said hubber has read any hubs at all they would know. If they read any forum posts at all they would know.

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         Rafiniposted 14 years agoin reply to this

         i must have missed that thread

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            Faybe Bayposted 14 years agoin reply to this

            I won't ruin your day by dredging it up from my back pages. I will go check on the hubber though and see if the message was received.

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      mega1posted 14 years agoin reply to this

      I've seen you around the forums and you seem like a fairly reasonable person.  So maybe you can give me some advice, or feedback or whatever you call it - this afternoon we started a little thread called "tittering" about breast awareness specifically for a website of the same name that would promote breast cancer awareness - a pun on the word titter that means "giggle" and I asked Hubbers for pics (especially of themselves or friends, but not exclusively) - clothed, of course. Well, what we got was some very very scanty pics of women mainly that were probably not useable for the project I had in mind.  Then it got really strange and one hubber was talking about milk! while another posted pictures that were quite grossly destorted.  I think people saw the pun on titter and thought it was way more risque than I had anticipated. What do you think of that?  should I have been bent out of shape, or not?  (actually, I realize that this is just par for the forums, but I did get my feathers a little ruffled from people willfully misunderstanding) Or maybe somebody else will read this and tell me what, if anything, I can say to get that idea back on track?
      
      or am I hijacking this thread?  well in response to your questions - I wouldn't worry about these kind of personal questions because I really think people exaggerate their plights, and they usually know what response they're gonna get, just want feedback.  and similarly I do not ask for peoples advice about things other than hub questions.  I personally think people reveal way to much about themselves, bordering on dangerous to give out such personal info.  Altho, it is very easy to fall in to chatting with someone and revealing a lot, I would never ask another hubber for advice about my love life!  (if I had one, that is!)

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         Faybe Bayposted 14 years agoin reply to this

         Mega I already read the hub and I'm in, even voted, but you see I have only photos of a monkey, although I'd never heard it called that until the friend who found it called me and said he found it. Childbirth, you know. No breast photos, have to find some.

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      2. 83

         Rafiniposted 14 years agoin reply to this

         Mega - i sent you an email.
         
         I guess i'm still too sensitive, even in online conversations 
         and that's why my inner critic rages at times.  i like to discuss personal issues to a point but realize the ultimate decision is up to me or the other person.  I enjoy it cuz nobody knows who I really am so I have no fear - and it's something I cant do face to face for the opposite reasons (except with a therapist!).   i guess it's a matter of:  to each their own 

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2. 0

   Iðunnposted 14 years ago

   On the first subject, in my opinion it's her business and I wouldn't worry about it at all.  I just don't care, it doesn't affect me and I tend to let other people mind their own business.
   
   On the second subject, I think you've brought up something pretty important.  It's easy to bond with strangers on the internet.  A few days or weeks seems to take the place of the years you would normally take to invest in others to form trust bonds.
   
   I'd suggest that people seriously pay attention to situaions just like the one you described (which I haven't seen yet, but I've seen many like it) inviting strangers to share extremely personal data online.  Always assume it can be used against you later by bored others, sometimes by the person collecting the information directly and sometimes just invisible readers. 
   
   People grossly underestimate the damage that can be done by trolls and I've found many others who are nice people assume most internet others to be nice - positive projection.  I did myself and had to learn the hard way my mistake.  This is a terrible assumption.  Most people are nice, but trolls gravitate to message boards to play out their games, often in multiple aes so the percentage of them is one area is much higher than say, the percent of trolls internet-wise. 
   
   However, ultimately you yourself are responsible for how you choose to respond.  I've certainly made mistakes in trust in the past regarding online interactions and I would encourage everyone to think of safety first.

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      Rafiniposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      i agree wholeheartedly.  i just felt the need to start the thread cuz I was worried my criticism would show up inappropriately in another one.  (thoughts were already forming )

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3. 83

   Rafiniposted 14 years ago

   one more -
   
   when you are new, please read the responses to you post!  especially the ones giving information re: how hubpages works.

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      Faybe Bayposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      exactly! I went back to the original forum post and the hubber never returned. I checked the hub and they are still posting new additions in their hubs comments section, directing people to the forums to read poetry! I do not think said hubber even opened my e-mail. I was very clear. Yet the few fans are explaining to post the poetry there...
      I am shaking my head.

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         Rafiniposted 14 years agoin reply to this

         me too 

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            Faybe Bayposted 14 years agoin reply to this

            Actually what the regulars did with the thread is funny. I'll let you read, but it says Don't Read.
            
            http://hubpages.com/forum/topic/36939#post836871

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               Rafiniposted 14 years agoin reply to this

               hehhehe
               i took a look when it was first posted but didn't know what to say to a topic that said Dont Read!  lol

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                  Faybe Bayposted 14 years agoin reply to this

                  Yeah, so I clicked his name and figured out, hey I've been here before!

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   tantrumposted 14 years ago

   
   
   Welcome to HP, all of you !!

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      Faybe Bayposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      oops sorry, we were ranting it's true. but you see it was extenuating circumstances.

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         tantrumposted 14 years agoin reply to this

         I C !
         
         
         
         
         

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   Flightkeeperposted 14 years ago

   It's hard to have a catchy name for something like breast awareness without it being kinda...weird.  I understand the play on words regarding "tittering" but there are just some strange people out there who might not have gotten it. Which is why I think you got those strange pix of people in flimsy nightgowns.
   
   I don't know maybe you should publish a hub about strange people in flimsy nightgowns so that we can all be tittering

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      mega1posted 14 years agoin reply to this

      you're so right!

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   Ohmaposted 14 years ago

   Mega1 I am a little confused? exactly when did you become offende by your tittering thread http://hubpages.com/forum/topic/37040 before or after you changed your Avatar pick?

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   tantrumposted 14 years ago

   The OP seems this was a thread for joking. That's what I thought. And everybody else as well !
   
   http://hubpages.com/forum/topic/37040#post839470
   
   It doesn't say anything about breast cancer until pinky touched that topic

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      Rafiniposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      i have seen this before but didn't want to ask         lol
      
      what is OP?

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         tantrumposted 14 years agoin reply to this

         Open Post
         

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      mega1posted 14 years agoin reply to this

      that's right - pinky and I were the only ones on the thread and she said "It could be in relevance to breast cancer awareness, somehow"  and then we should have talked more about that there.  But even if there had not been the breast cancer awareness part, I wasn't thinking that people would post such gross pics of breasts or talk about milk?  and I am actually laughing as it did start as a joke - so don't take it too seriously!

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8. 60

   Ohmaposted 14 years ago

   OP-opening post

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9. 77

   mega1posted 14 years ago

   I wasn't exactly offended, just didn't plan on having the idea turn into strangeness -  it began to get strange around
   
   http://hubpages.com/forum/topic/37040?page=8
   
   and the women with (obviously enhanced and distorted photos) large large large breasts were not at all what I had asked for and then people started talking about milk!  also strange! well you will see it in context - thing is I was going along with everything until suddenly I thought "Hey! this is not breast cancer awareness and it is all off track!"  which is what I shoul have said, and will say, maybe, tomorrow!  I'm not mad or upset or anything - I often get ideas, big plans, and then they go astray!  : 
   
   oh, and the other photos got progressively skimpier until I did reign it in by saying "no nipples" - My mom used to tell me, whenever I was disappointed by friends  "Well, you've just got to know the crowd you are running with!"  heh heh!

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   1. 61

      tantrumposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      The OP seems this was a thread for joking. That's what I thought. And everybody else as well !
      
      http://hubpages.com/forum/topic/37040#post839470
      
      It doesn't say anything about breast cancer until pinky touched that topic.
      
      You weren't very specific. that's what happened ! LOL!!

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      Faybe Bayposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      Hi Rochelle! Mega, you guys did get a bit out of hand, as I said I have no photos of breasts, bet you're glad now.

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         Rochelle Frankposted 14 years agoin reply to this

         I didn't post there.

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    Rochelle Frankposted 14 years ago

    OP= original poster.

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       tantrumposted 14 years agoin reply to this

       I thought it was open post !
       OH!
       
       
       
       

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          Rafiniposted 14 years agoin reply to this

          
          
          they all work just so i know for next time 

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