IMPORTANT HEALTH ADVICE FOR WOMEN

  1. Eric Graudins profile image60
    Eric Graudinsposted 10 years ago

    Received this from a friend who is a serial emailer.
    Author unknown.
    =============================

    IMPORTANT HEALTH ADVICE FOR WOMEN lol

    Do you have feelings of inadequacy?
    Do you suffer from shyness?
    Do you sometimes wish you were more assertive?


    If you answered yes to any of these questions, ask your doctor or
    pharmacist about White Wine.

    White Wine is the safe, natural way to feel better and more confident
    about yourself and your actions. White Wine can help ease you out of
    your shyness and let you tell the world that you're ready and willing to
    do just about anything.
    You will notice the benefits of White Wine almost immediately and with a
    regimen of regular doses you can overcome any obstacles that prevent you
    from living the life you want to live.
    Shyness and awkwardness will be a thing of the past and you will
    discover many talents you never knew you had. Stop hiding and start
    living, with White Wine. White Wine may not be right for everyone. Women
    who are pregnant or nursing should not use White Wine. However, women
    who wouldn't mind nursing or becoming pregnant are encouraged to try it.

    Side effects may include dizziness, nausea, vomiting, incarceration,
    erotic lustfulness, loss of motor control, loss of clothing, loss of
    money, loss of virginity, delusions of grandeur, table dancing,
    headache, dehydration, dry mouth, and a desire to sing Karaoke and play
    all-night rounds of Strip Poker, Truth Or Dare, and Naked Twister.

    WARNING:
    The consumption of White Wine may make you think you are whispering when
    you are not.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    WARNING:
    The consumption of White Wine is a major factor in dancing like an
    idiot.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    WARNING:
    The consumption of White Wine may cause you to tell your friends over
    and over again that you love them.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    WARNING:
    The consumption of White Wine may cause you to think you can sing.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    WARNING:
    The consumption of White Wine may lead you to believe that ex-lovers are
    really dying for you to telephone them at four in the morning.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    WARNING:
    The consumption of White Wine may make you think you can logically
    converse with members of the opposite sex without spitting.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    WARNING:
    The consumption of White Wine may create the illusion that you are
    tougher, smarter, faster and better looking than most people
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    NOW JUST IMAGINE WHAT YOU COULD ACHIEVE WITH RED WINE!!

  2. Shadesbreath profile image83
    Shadesbreathposted 10 years ago

    Eric, you know I love you man, but... back away from the Internet.  Just, you know, step back and, I don't know, throw a frisbee at your dog or something.  Just for a day or two.

 
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