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The Best Life Quotes-Twenty Funny Quotes About Animals

Updated on July 5, 2012

The Best Life Quotes

I can't remember who said "There's only one thing that seperates us from animals;we aren't afraid of vacuum cleaners."I think there maybe a few more differences than that between us and the huge animal population. Read on for more funny quotations about animals.

Funny Animal Quotes

Scientists say there are 3,000 spiders for every human being on earth.Does anybody want mine?Because I certainly don't. Chuck Bonner.

The horse is dangerous at both ends and uncomfortable in the middle. Ian Fleming.

Imagine if birds were tickled by feathers. You would see a flock of birds fly by hysterically laughingI. Steven Wright.

A hen is only an eggs way of making another egg. Samuel Butler.

The monkey is an organised sarcasm upon the human race. Henry Ward Becher.

It is even harder for the average ape to believe he descended from man. H L Mencken.

I am fond of pigs. Dogs look up to us . Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals. Winston Churchill

A zebra cannot change it's spots. Dan Quayle.

I am the pink sheep of the family. Alexander McQueen.

A  mind the calibre of mine cannot derive it's nutrients from cows. George Bernard Shaw.

The fox knows many things, the hedgehog just one big thing! Erasmus.

Did you know that squirrels are the devil's oven mitts. Miss Piggy.

A racehorse is the only animal that can take a thousand people for a ride at the same time.Herbert Prochnow.

A camel is a horse designed by a committee. .Alec Issignosis.

If a swamp alligator could talk it would sound like Tennessee Williams. Max Reed.

To create man was a quaint and original idea, but to add sheep was tautology. Mark Twain.

Kids, if you want a kitten, start asking your parents for a horse.Marty Allen.

My hamster died yesterday. Fell asleep at the wheel. Frank Carson.

I think animal testing is a terrible idea,they get all nervous and give the wrong answers.  Hugh Laurie.

Dogs have a nice life.You never see a dog with a wristwatch.  George Carlin.


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    • Cogerson profile image

      Cogerson 6 years ago from Virginia

      Great favorites would be the Churchill pig one and ...and the Tennessee Williams swap alligator....voted up and funny