The Bully Guide - A Revolution Starts With ONE....
The Bully Guide
The following is my opinion on a way to end bullying for people who are currently being bullied or know someone that's being bullied.
1. Know Your Bully
A bully is a person just like you. If this person harasses you, physical or verbal, day after day, it's time to speak your mind to them. Talk to them and figure out why they treat you this way.
Try a few questions, like:
What is your problem with me?
Why do you bully me every chance you get?
I have done nothing to you, so why do you do this to me?
Chances are, they have no answer for any of these questions. Bullies tend to bully, because they can. I believe it's rare that a bully has a problem that he takes out on other people. A lot of bullies come from very respectable homes so to say they are brought up wrong is not fair.
Newsflash, people are just cruel. We are human, and humans do things because they feel like it. Unlike other animals we can think about what we are doing. And that is what these questions are for.
Stop your bully and make him think about what he is doing. Make them understand that making their pain your pain is wrong. And if they are doing it for fun, let them know it's not fun for you.
2. Defend Yourself
Some people can be scared to stand up for them selves. Some may tell you violence is not the answer, or don't respond... or my favorite, "ignore them and they'll go away. These people must not live in the real world. People don't just go away. Words hurt as much as fists to some people. I joke about telling people to "man up" but to be honest, everyone has their limit and you have every right to say or do what you feel is right to defend your self, from ANYONE.
I had thick skin in school so words never bothered me, but that moment you decided you were brave enough to put your hands on me was a different story. DON"T EVER allow someone to think they have the right to put their hands on you in anyway, because they will do it every chance they get.
When someone puts their hands on you, you have the right to defend yourself, never think someone is too big or that they seem scary that you can't fight back. Sometimes the best way to get a bullies attention, is to knock them on their ass one good time. Trust I've got a few people to never look at me again after letting them know I mean business. This doesn't mean go pick a fight with people you feel have wronged you, just defend yourself when you need too.
However verbal is a different story, you should remember words are just that, words. Let people say what they want. But if you feel they've crossed the line and you can't take anymore, look at them and tell them, "That's enough, you had your fun, but you've crossed the line, now please leave me alone." They may respond with physical threats in which you should respond "you are completely immature and this situation is unnecessary." This is not an exact wording, but you get the idea. Remember to stay calm, there is nothing better than an over energized bully messing with a guy that's calm as a snail, take some of that umph away from his crowd when his insults don't affect you.
3. Tell Someone
Now this one can go either way. It could be good, or it could be bad. (I'll get to the bad at the end of this.) It's as simple as this, talk to your family and/or talk to some friends about the way this bully treats you. If you have real friends they'll have your back when you have to face them (REMEMBER POWER IN NUMBERS).
And you'll need family to support you, I say family because not every one has a mom or dad. Family can be the ones to talk you through situations, hell, everyone knows cousins are the ones that will fight hardest for you. But if you have a brother or sister that's older, talk to them about this, they can help, NEVER THINK NO ONE CARES. THE LAST PERSON YOU EXPECT TO CARE MAY BE THE PERSON THAT CARES THE MOST.
4. Understand
This is actually directed at friends of victims. If your friend is being bullied don't act impulsively. Talk to them, some people don't want to be defended because they feel it makes things worse, and it just might. Just understand what your friend needs from you. Usually it's someone to stand with them.
Which leads me to...
Bystanders
One of the worst things about bullying is the people that stand around cheering it on or do nothing.
First, don't laugh at some else's pain (not unless their telling the joke). You would hate it if someone messed with you all day everyday, so why make this persons life worse and laugh in their face while being insulted. Bullies are usually influenced by the people around them, if no one agrees with the bully, then they become irrelevant.
Second, if you think bullying is wrong, then HELLO, defend the person being bullied. You are already standing their, letting the Bully know they've got an audience. Now, since you hate what they are doing step between them and tell them to shut their mouth because what they are doing is not cool. Oh, look at that, a few of YOUR good friends are standing with you, poor bully out numbered, I'm sure they just walked away. COMMON SENSE rules all.
PARENTS & TEACHERS
Now this is the hardest. What do you do when a student or your child tells you they are being bullied. "Go to the principle and schedule a meeting..." STOP, just stop. What you're about to do is just going to make it worse.
Parents, stop running to the school and telling every little thing your kid tells you. The school will try to confirm if what was said is true, American logic says "if someone makes a claim, then go straight to the other party to confirm." Because hello, the bully will tell you if he's bullying people.
I'm sure some of you are wondering what you can do.
First, parents of bullied children, get involved at your child's school (PTA meetings, hold events that support causes) the only way to stop something like this is to change everything. Get kids to stand up for each other. Get a sense of community going on in schools, get some good morals going into our kids minds. Put your child in karate/kung fu classes, let them build their confident and defend them selves. They will only survive with your aid, not your interference. If your kid understands who they are and have the confidence to embrace who they are, a bully can say or do nothing to hurt them.
And last, to parents with kids that ARE bullies. BE BETTER PARENTS, that is all. I don't care if you go on camping trips every week with your kid. If your kid is a bully it's because the parents failed to inform their child that hurting others is wrong. FIX IT!
This is apart of my Anti Bullying movement. To support and get more imformation on the film please visit the KickStarter. Stay safe and Be Blessed. Thank You
The Bully Guide Film KickStater
- "The Bully Guide" A Revolution Starts With ONE... by Inspiration Studios » Backers &md
Inspiration Studios is raising funds for "The Bully Guide" A Revolution Starts With ONE... on Kickstarter! ... one person, one idea, one goal. A story of the abuse students go through with bullying. A heartbreaking real look at our world.