What makes the average parent a dream destroyer regarding children who are more

1. 86

   gmwilliamsposted 3 years ago

   What makes the average parent a dream destroyer regarding children who are more creative,
   
   artistic, and unconventional in terms of educational/career aspirations, goals, and options?   Children of a creative, artistic, and/or unconventional bent are oftentimes told by average parents to have "more realistic" goals and to get a "real job".  Such children's creative, artistic, and unconventional dreams are mocked, even derided by such parents as being impractical, even foolish.   Only the strong creative, artistic, and/or unconventional child pursues his/her dreams no matter what.  Many creative, artistic, and unconventional children subvert their dreams into "realistic" careers.
   
   

   replyreport
2. 82

   Ricki-Lee Keeleyposted 3 years ago

   Some parents are jealous of their child's natural talent. Others just repeat what they think their own parents would say because that is what they learned growing up. Sometimes the average parent is honestly worried for their child's future. It is a common understanding in modern society that creative jobs do not make very much money.
   
   Hope this helped,
   Cheers

   replyreport
   1. 86

      gmwilliamsposted 3 years agoin reply to this

      You are so spot on in your analysis.

      replyreport
3. 93

   Pollyanna Jonesposted 3 years ago

   Totally agree with Ricki-Lee on this. My mom poo-poos my work, be it art or my writing, and instead of being encouraging always belittles me or is just plain nasty. It used to stunt my creative output as it really did affect my belief in my own work, and damaged my motivation.
   
   I'd hear from second-hand sources, that she would "show off" my art, writing, and achievements when with her peers, in a bid to make herself look good. Relatives that she grew up with explained to me how she always had to be top of the class, even though she didn't have that much ability. If she couldn't be top, she'd be nasty to those that she perceived to be better than her. It all clicked; she is jealous and petty. It's as if she feels she is in some sort of competition with me, which is very strange!!
   
   Since I stopped paying attention to all of that negativity, I've allowed myself to just get on with it. Her opinion does not matter at all. I don't need her to be proud of my work. If it's good enough for me, it'll do!
   
   Don't get me wrong, I love my mother, and am pretty sure that she has always done what she believes is the best. I don't think she even realises that she does these things.
   
   On the bright side, she's shown me a warning of how such behaviours affect a child. I will never do that to my own.

   replyreport
   1. 86

      gmwilliamsposted 3 years agoin reply to this

      Wonderful answer, by the way, was your mother the oldest child.  Many oldest children have issues of power and always being first.  If they aren't first, they don't want anyone else to be first either.

      replyreport
   2. 93

      Pollyanna Jonesposted 3 years agoin reply to this

      Yes, she is the oldest of four!

      replyreport
   3. 86

      gmwilliamsposted 3 years agoin reply to this

      Oldest children must be first.  They have to be the top banana so to speak or they are miserable.  Oldest children do not want to be outdone by anyone.  They have power issues!

      replyreport