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Part 4 of The Family Sarnath: The Family that Performs Ritualistic Human Sacrifice Together, Stays Together.

Updated on May 8, 2013

Chapter 8: It's a Soft J.

While the old Mr. and Mrs. Keane were virtually non-existent, there did yet exist a small remnant of their former humanity tucked away in some small, slimy corner of the cephalic members of their new identities. And it was in this slimy corner that a tinge of sadness was felt by the Keane parents for the loss of their rebellious, yet endearingly chubby little son, Jeffy. Granted, this foreign sense of loss was experienced by the Keanes for but thirty seconds, yet even so, the Deep Ones could sense the pain they had caused their earthly hosts, and were prepared to offer their condolences. Within moments of Jeffy being pulled into the ocean by a mess of black tentacles, there did emerge from the depths....The P.J.

Popping his terrifying and amphibious head out of Jeffy's worthless shrine, The P.J., (short for Priest of Jog-Sothoth- it's a soft J) slithered its way into the Keane's hearts, and then, like a gelatinous piece of primordial slop, slithered its way onto Dolly's forehead, latching itself leech-like to her temporal lobe in hopes of ingesting sustenance. After a near eternity of time spent removing the entity (and explaining to the doctor why Dolly required 32 stitches), the Keane family accepted The P.J. as their own- a perfectly acceptable replacement for what's-his-name.

Chapter 9: Out of the Minds of Babes...

The P.J. and Billy formed an instant bond, as Billy knew he had much to learn from an 8000 year old entity. Conversely, The P.J. appreciated Billy's enthusiasm for pursuits rarely entertained by ten-year-old boys: moonlit chants in the local cemetery, Necronomicon memorization, and extremely bloody human sacrifice. While The P.J.'s fearsome cephalopodic body lacked vocal chords, it transmitted mental messages to Billy, urging him on towards greater and greater heights of occultic aspirations- as well as increased body counts. In turn, not only did Billy's thirst for blood increase, but his thirst for power as well. While barely the height of his father's kneecap, Billy began delegating assignments to Mr. Keane, expecting complete obedience to his will. When the child ordered Mr. Keane to murder his own physician, the parents began to formulate suspicions as to just how beneficial an addition The P.J. was to their household.

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