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And Now We are Four...More or Less: When Adult Children Move Back Home

Updated on September 3, 2010

A Little Family History

Back in May of 2008, my husband, Anthony, and I proudly sent our 20 year old son, Aaron, off to Universal Technical Institute to pursue his automotive passion. It was difficult at first, for he is our only child, but within only a few months, we settled in comfortably as a couple, with Aaron only six hours away from home. We have always been a closely knit trio, and it was not surprising to learn that he planned to return home when he graduated.  We would be 'empty-nesters' no more.

Aaron was raised in this tiny town of Bishop, California, since he was five years old, and he has always loved the rural nature of the place: His school was in Sacramento, and the poor boy-I mean, young man-was miserable.

Home Improvements

Aaron was quite the student during this period, for he rarely ventured outside of his apartment, finding the big city daunting in its size and complexity. At the end of 2008, however, he acquired a cat, a dog, and, lo and behold, a girlfriend. How this happened, I'll never know, since mothers are never privy to such information.

Suffice it to say, Christine is a precious young woman, and I believe my son feels the same way. I must admit I had a few doubts about his continued excellence in his studies with her arrival, but thank God I was wrong, and Aaron graduated top of his class on Friday, November 13, 2009.

Anthony and I drove that long and winding road to Sacramento with both excitement and concern, for after the ceremony, we were to help pack their household and move them back home.  Did I forget to mention that the cat had just given birth to 5 kittens?  I believe I did, so sorry, but if you are parents, I imagine you'll understand my wavering sanity at the moment.

Moving Day

The day of transition arrived and we were all on the road by 10 a.m., Aaron driving his car with car-sick prone Christine holding the kittens on her lap, and the dog on my lap in our truck. Now of course we were instructed to stay on Aaron's 'tail' due to his bad tags, which led to a wild ride, indeed. After a Hummer nearly ran our truck off the road in Placerville, my husband decided to back off just a little and let Aaron adjust. He did. Thanks, kid, I mean, young man.

The other unfortunate incident was that just north of June Lake, my son's weary automobile chose to overheat. Now my son is a brand new graduate, you recall, of an auto tech school, but did he think to bring a jug of water? You know the answer. So we began slipping all of the iced tea we could find into the radiator, and somehow we managed to make it to town.

Wait a minute.  There was another-almost-unfortunate incident-how could I forget? As we 'sort of' slowed to approach yet another tiny town, we spied one of those strategically placed police cars off the side of the road. Waiting. My son made the decision to pull into the only gas station in town, we followed. And what do you know? The cop pulled in as well, but on the opposite side. To fill up, thankfully.

Hearts all aflutter, we took off before he could fill his tank-and made it home unscathed!

Home Sweet Home

No matter how much love you may have for your progeny, moving him-them-back into a household is a daunting task. There is 'stuff' to be unloaded, animals to be introduced, and boundaries to be established. Unfortunately, our home is fairly small, and all of this new 'stuff' was initially placed on the dining room table. I do believe the animals had a less stressful time than we humans the first few days, as boundaries were set by my hubby and me as soon as we saw our domicile becoming a box depository.

Of course I had been forewarned of the necessity of 'contracts' and of the benefits of gathering together in a rational way to discuss all of these issues beforehand, but, well, we simply didn't do it that way.  But Aaron and Christine are adapting wonderfully to-mostly Anthony's-household regulations.  Admittedly, I am somewhat protective of my computer time, but I am learning to be flexible-I think. 

Commotion and Adaptation

Now, all in all this has been a transition full of joy and reunion.  Aaron is a very popular young man in this small town, and our house has been full of friends and energy.  This is taking some getting used to on the part of my hubby and me, but, hey, it's only been a week.

The only sorrow to this new life is that during some of this commotion, Aaron forgot to close one of our doors, and we have lost one of our cats, Rocky.

At first, I was enraged and heartbroken, but on reflection, I realized that Aaron felt terrible, for he grew up with that cat-Rocky was the oldest animal in our home.  My only words to him were "Never Again!" and I am certain that he heard me loud and clear.


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    • lorlie6 profile image

      Laurel Rogers 6 years ago from Bishop, Ca

      Hi MT! Today my d-i-l and I are almost the best of friends, though there have been some awesome rough spots. She is a wonderful young woman, but it's taken me time to find this out!

      My son, however, is still quite a piece of work, though he has been maturing by the day...I think because of Christine and his son, and of course, by the circumstances at the moment.

      The drive itself was sooo crazy, but all is pretty okay these days, though that car they drove died!!!

      Thanks for the visit!


    • Millionaire Tips profile image

      Shasta Matova 6 years ago from USA

      Oh gosh, I hope my daughter's return isn't nearly as eventful as yours. I hope you have all adjusted now.

    • lorlie6 profile image

      Laurel Rogers 7 years ago from Bishop, Ca

      Thanks so much, saleheensblog-Rocky did return, then died a couple of weeks later. He was old, though, and had a fabulous cat life.

      Thanks for stopping by.

    • lorlie6 profile image

      Laurel Rogers 7 years ago from Bishop, Ca

      I'm sure you did see it differently from your mom! They've moved out, I am glad to say, but we do live only a mile away.

      Much more tolerable now!

    • Rebecca E. profile image

      Rebecca E. 7 years ago from Canada

      a great read, and in a sense my mom and i saw it in different ways, and had a laugh with this.

    • lorlie6 profile image

      Laurel Rogers 7 years ago from Bishop, Ca

      I'm not going anywhere, that's for sure!

    • ahorseback profile image

      ahorseback 7 years ago

      Stick with us hubbers we'll pull you through.......

    • lorlie6 profile image

      Laurel Rogers 7 years ago from Bishop, Ca

      Oh yeah! ;)

    • ahorseback profile image

      ahorseback 7 years ago

      Lolie , empty nesters unite , power to the parents ,right on! Thanks and good luck girl.

    • lorlie6 profile image

      Laurel Rogers 7 years ago from Bishop, Ca

      Do you mean you moved things around on the squirrel hub? I'll go have another look. Thanks, Micky, for the visit!

    • Micky Dee profile image

      Micky Dee 7 years ago

      Fantastic! Happy ending and all! Great hub! I really came over to tell you that you have a great "eye" - thank you! I moved some things around. But I'm glad I found this and I'm glad Rocky Dude is back!

    • lorlie6 profile image

      Laurel Rogers 7 years ago from Bishop, Ca

      Hi Eiddwen-you're a dear for finding this one, it was one of the first hubs I ever wrote!

      Thanks for coming for a read.

    • Eiddwen profile image

      Eiddwen 7 years ago from Wales

      I've only just come across this one and again it's brilliant. Once I start reading I cannot take my eyes away until the end as usual. Thanks again for sharing this lorlie6

    • lorlie6 profile image

      Laurel Rogers 7 years ago from Bishop, Ca

      Thanks for coming by, oliversmum! It was quite the ordeal, but all in all, a wonderful turn of events.

      Take care!

    • oliversmum profile image

      oliversmum 7 years ago from australia

      lorlie6. Hi. Wow what an absolutely beautiful story, on what it took to move your son back home, extremely exhausting but wonderful, and you also gained a beautiful young lady as well, and of course the animals.

      It is so sad that you lost you cat Rocky, hopefully he is very happy where ever he is.

      I loved your story. There is nothing better than to have your Family near by.

      Thanks so much for sharing your story with us. :) :)

    • lorlie6 profile image

      Laurel Rogers 8 years ago from Bishop, Ca

      TS-sometimes I wish he were still under 5, but I remember how hard that was as well.

      It sure does get complex these days, but it's grand to now see him as a 'young man!'



    • ThoughtfulSpot profile image

      ThoughtfulSpot 8 years ago from PA

      What a great read... glad I stopped by. I have 2 boys, much younger than yours, and, as complicated as my life with them seems at times, you've reminded me to enjoy the simplicity of them being in the "under 5" range... if only for a very short time.

    • lorlie6 profile image

      Laurel Rogers 8 years ago from Bishop, Ca

      habee-I know what you mean...and I'm STILL tired! :O)

    • habee profile image

      Holle Abee 8 years ago from Georgia

      That made me tired...but thanks for sharing! Been there, by the way.

    • lorlie6 profile image

      Laurel Rogers 8 years ago from Bishop, Ca

      Thanks, K-I am so excited...thanks for stopping by.

      Jane-I really appreciate your words of encouragement!

    • Jane@CM profile image

      Jane@CM 8 years ago

      Lorlie, what a great story. Our daughter went off to college this fall, but only 30 minutes away. It was still an adjustment. You are an amazing writer, once I start reading one of your hubs I can't stop!

    • K Partin profile image

      K Partin 8 years ago from Garden City, Michigan

      Hey lorlie, great hub, I'm tired....and I just read in the forum Rocky is back, great news I'm happy for you! Thanks K.

    • lorlie6 profile image

      Laurel Rogers 8 years ago from Bishop, Ca

      Thanks for reading, James...I'm afraid Rocky's a creature gone back to God, or, perhaps, to a neighbor's house!

    • James A Watkins profile image

      James A Watkins 8 years ago from Chicago

      Excellent tale with a good ending (except for Rocky). Thanks for the reading pleasure. I liked it.

    • lorlie6 profile image

      Laurel Rogers 8 years ago from Bishop, Ca

      Absolutely, billips, absolutely!

    • billips profile image

      billips 8 years ago from Central Texas

      Lovely Hub - so like life - some good, some bad, some ups, some downs, but how wonderful to have number one son Home Again - B.

    • lorlie6 profile image

      Laurel Rogers 8 years ago from Bishop, Ca

      Oh LORD, elayne!!! Wow, you should have written a hub on this, not me. :o) But thanks for the message and certainly that closeness with your 4 eldest grandkids is a huge blessing.

    • elayne001 profile image

      Elayne 8 years ago from Rocky Mountains

      I feel you! My four children all got married and then moved back in and stayed 'til after their first babies were born. It was difficult, mostly because they took what seemed like "my babies" with them. I am still really close to the four oldest grandchildren because of that.

    • lorlie6 profile image

      Laurel Rogers 8 years ago from Bishop, Ca

      ralwus-I am learning to share, and it's not so bad: Sharing gets me off the thing for a while!

      poetlorraine-I appreciate your comment, mostly because it WAS so interesting!!

    • profile image

      poetlorraine 8 years ago

      that made a nice read, you made it so interesting, well done

    • profile image

      ralwus 8 years ago

      Yes, that could be a stressful time for all. good luck now. Rocky will probably return. I don't like anyone near my PC, bad enough I have to share with my wife. I got her one for herself a few weeks back and am awaiting its arrival.

    • lorlie6 profile image

      Laurel Rogers 8 years ago from Bishop, Ca

      Thanks, Ladybird, that's quite nice to hear!

    • Ladybird33 profile image

      Ladybird33 8 years ago from Fabulous USA

      Craziness can be a good thing (but nice when it's quiet time too, huh?) You have a talent, to do a lot in a short amount of time :) Kudo's to you.

    • lorlie6 profile image

      Laurel Rogers 8 years ago from Bishop, Ca

      I am already laughing-but not about my Rocky...But I'll get over that and I do know he's in God's hands. Thanks for the commentary!

    • Chin chin profile image

      Chin chin 8 years ago from Philippines

      It's nice to have families together again even for just reunions. The commotions and adjustments spices up life. It is something I'm looking forward to someday with my parents, brother and sister.

    • Green Lotus profile image

      Hillary 8 years ago from Atlanta, GA

      What an ordeal, but you know you'll look back and laugh one day. I have to remember to put iced tea in the radiator next time i overheat!

    • lorlie6 profile image

      Laurel Rogers 8 years ago from Bishop, Ca

      I do appreciate your input, itakins-now I must relax and enjoy!

    • itakins profile image

      itakins 8 years ago from Irl

      Oh boy-let's hope time will get things under control-daunting to say the least.Great read though.

    • lorlie6 profile image

      Laurel Rogers 8 years ago from Bishop, Ca

      Thanks, Crazd! I'm tired myself!!!

    • profile image

      Crazdwriter 8 years ago

      Wow Lorlie...phew! You made me tired just by reading everything you had to do in order to get your son and his girlfriend, dog, and 6 cats home. PHEW! I think I need to take a break now lol

      Two thumbs up on the hub!


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