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How to Bullyproof Your Only Child
Your Only Child Does Not Have To Be The Object Of School Bullies
Many people have the mistaken perception that school bullies routinely target only children because they are alone and have no older siblings to defend them. This could not be further from the truth. School bullies target a certain type of child whether or not he/she has siblings or is a singleton.
Children who are targeted by school bullies often have characteristics and circumstances which the school bully perceived to be different and threatening. Some school bullies pick on children who are smarter, prettier, and/or more intelligent. While other school bullies single out children who are more sensitive and/or more introverted. Still there are quite a few school bullies who pick on children who are more economically advantaged than they are.
Many bullies often target children who elect not go along with the crowd. The characteristics of the picked on children vary and their family size varies. There are children from multichild families ranging from small to very large who are routinely picked on by school bullies for whatever reason he/she deem necessary while there are singleton children who are not picked on at all because of their personality characteristics and they have a high sense of self-confidence.
Oh, how I digress. There is an increase in one-child familiy in the late twentieth and early twenty first centuries. I shall not go into an analytic litany of how only children are high achievers and have excellent interpersonal relationships with teachers and peers alike. Yes, there is an increase in the population of only children; however, there is also an increase in bullying behaviors in the school system.
There are more studies done to the deleterious effects of bullying on the victim. These deleterious effects range from being totally withdrawn, having a marked decrease in self-esteem, depression, and committing suicide. Children need to be protected from bullies however teachers and parents cannot be everywhere. This means that children have to innovate methodologies in which to protect themselves.
Because only children have no older siblings to defend them, they can develop friendships with trusted, responsible, and reliable older students at their schools. Oftentimes, older students, whether or not they are blood related, look out for younger pupils. Only children also have closer relationships with their parents than children with siblings so parents often play a clear and highly visible role in nipping bullying behavior at the beginning stages. If an only child is targeted by a school bully in the early stages, he/she should inform the parents who will in turn inform the schools. Parents are often instrumental in nipping bullying in the bud.
Oftentimes, only children are singled out by school bullies because they are often more affluent and smarter than the general school population. Many times only children are very mature beyond their years and are well behaved in class much to the bane of other children. Only children are often or not teacher's pets. More fuel to the fire. Teacher's pets are often singled out by school bullies because they are jealous of the child's status.
Only children often have a special relationship with teachers who admire them either because of their scholastic status or other related factors. I remember in my elementary school each time a school bully picked on me and/or another only child, we would simply tell the teacher who would publicly and physically chastise the school bully in front of the class. This would teach him/her a lesson by effectively nipping the act in the bud. Only children often have a relationship with teachers and other adult authority figures that children in multichild families do not have.
To reiterate, since teachers and parents cannot be always present, the only child has to develop intense physical skills to deter and discourage the school bully. There are sports and karate classes to develop physical coordination and dexterity which does come in handy to deflate the school bully and teach him/her a harsh physical lesson. Also only children can deflate the school bully's ego by discovering and/or focusing on his/her Achilles heel, venomously addressing that. The majority of school bullies do not like to have their weakest spot addressed and highlighted- that would be too embarrasing and would make him/her lose face.
Yes, only children can effectively defend themselves from school bullies by using all the avenues that I have addressed above. Since only children can easily interact with adults, they can enlist teacher, administrative, and parental support regarding this issue. Furthermore, they can develop relationships with trusted and responsible older students in the school. Last of all, only children because of their self-sufficiency can develop strong physical and mental dexterity so he/she can deflate and totally stop the school bully in his/her tracks. Not to digress, I know of a girl who was the most picked on child throughout elementary and junior high school. She was even osctracized from her clique and spent most of her years alone. She was not an only child but the middle child of twenty children!