Does Your Extended Family Have Unrealistic Expectations of You Regarding Your Parenting Skills?
Do they not understand how slow that "system" is. Do they tell you how to discipline?
Actually I am fortunate to be out of that loop we just keep our parenting opinions to ourselves.I think that it's so much better if more families did this
My family is pretty close, so we have very similar parenting styles and skills. While we don't tell each other how to discipline, we share our experiences and help when asked.
If you're receiving unwanted advice, just say "thanks" and keep doing what works for you. Some people just like to be heard...
I really do say thanks but my family really doesn't have good boundries. I do raise my son very close to the way I was raised, but because he is special needs, they do have their opinions. I am a single mother and its me and my adult son only. I know him in and out. When I can not get him to comply with a simple request (i.e. get ready to go to the dr.), my family will say "just tell him" this or that. Basically I feel they don't respect my mothering skills, but I know they are just trying to help. It is frustrating,
Our extended family have never lived close by. But, I can guarantee, they would not have interfered or been involved in any way in the discipline of our children.
Extended family has no business weighing in on one's child raising skills unless there is some kind of abuse-then everyone should step in.
BleuBrenda, you need to draw very strong boundaries and let them know that you will not tolerate certain things. It isn't important that they are trying to help--if a man is drowning and someone is trying to help him, but keeps dunking his head under in an attempt to help--it is not help at all and the motives are unimportant.
I would tell them, I love you, but you are out of line and this is my son, and I am the parent and will make the decisions I need to--I will ask for help when I need it.. It is an entirely different matter if you ask them for help. Good luck!
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