I'm a father who raised two daughters who were successfully launched and are now married. I just wanted to share a simple practice that will tame your children in stores so that you are not one of those embarrassed, frustrated parents struggling with their kids who always want something and will scream and carry on, making you pay when you refuse them.
Simply explain your policy from when they're very young, even earlier then when you think they can understand. You will need to repeat the instructions as you follow through with your own policy. Simply explain: 1. Its O.K. to ask for something. 2. Know that you may or may not be able to get it. (You decide, not them, when you judge it appropriate to buy them something) and: 3. (Here is the important part) Explain that if they repeatedly ask, whine, or cry that it will ensure that they definitely will NOT GET whatever it is they want.
Every once in a while you will need to buy them something. You would anyway; wouldn't you? After a learning period, (during which time the policy may have little, if any, affect on their behavior) you will be blessed with well behaved children with which you will never fear taking them shopping.
Thank you, I think this is a subject many mothers are dealing with. I see it at the stores, at Disneyland, I even deal with it myself from time to time. I do agree about keeping them informed about the rules and expectations from the get go. I always remind my kids before we get into a store what the rules are. What we are buying and that today is not a day to ask for extra toys or vice versa, if we have time and money I let them know they can pick out something before we leave if they are good listeners. Not always, I have a problem with one of my daughters who likes to hide and then not answer when I call her. I know it's all fun and games to her but it does worry my so.
Its very important to have a framework within which you operate. When the kids know that there is a framework and that whatever the reason they cannot get out of the frame however hard they try to push the boundaries then they feel secure and you as parents will have happy contented children. Blessings.
I'm a mother of one toddler boy. I like to bring him around when I shop. I do grocery shopping most of the time and I will make use of the grocery shopping to educate my son on food, mathematics and science.
Of course I will always bring him around to the kids section for him to browse through the items. Personally, I enjoy shopping for any children's items. However, I will always state the rules before I bring him there. No running about, no whining. He will have to ask if he wants to look at something beyond his reach.
I have set 3 ABC rules for my son at this point of growing stage which he is still learning to adapt.
A - no Arguing
B - no Bargaining
C - no Complaining
Nonetheless, I will listen to him when he made his request politely. Overall, my shopping experience is enjoyable!
My children are picky eaters so every now and again I bring them with me to do the shopping. I let them choose one box of cereal each, one box of biscuits, one type of fruit, and so on. They know now that they can only choose one thing, so they pick the one they like the most and usually eat all of it later.
To avoid misunderstandings, before going in the shop I remind them that we are going to buy food and no toys. If they behave well during the shopping, then at the end I let them choose a sweet or go in the toy cars outside the shop.
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