In the ten years of the in law addition to my world, there have been three big blow outs. I've never experienced heated arguments, yelling and or hurtful intentional words before this addition.I have to admit that I have a way with words and presentation of the words that will rip your heart out of your chest with no signs of blood. Fortunately for me words don't phase me, but an action will hurt me to no end. Heaven forbid I hold on to the action, forgiveness will be hard to grant. So again, how do I crack open that door?
I did experience life with my MIL in the same house. While she was not evil, we had different lifestyles, priorities and sensibilities that made life together so hard. I was not happy living in her house and held grudges. Once, I blew out and spoke out all the accumulated anger, frustration into her face. I used strong words. We didn't speak for a week or so but at the end, I came to her and said sorry for (mind you) using such words (but not for feeling angry or having a different viewpoint). We forgave each other, cried and embraced. Two months later my life was changed, I moved out of her life and started a new one. I still maintain some contact with her (but not with my ex). Life can be interesting!
I would pick up the phone, call and say "out differences are hurting my husband, or whomever, and I want to correct that..."
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