Children Love Mothers More Than Fathers?

1. 60

   shop online fastposted 13 years ago

   Yeah.  what's up?
   
   What's this i'm hearing, in a certain poor neighbor, that children are more naturally drawn to their mothers than their fathers.  is this true?
   
   what's up with this nature, nurture?
   
   tell me. children naturally love their mothers more than they love their fathers?  how is that trur?

   replyreport
   1. 87

      Chasing Rileyposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      I don't think children love mothers more than fathers or vice versa. Men and women bring different attributes to parenting. When I first had kids, I remember so many moms who wouldn't leave their baby with their husbands because they felt he couldn't adequately take care of the child. I thought that was ridiculous and controlling. What they were really saying is that a dad wouldn't care for the baby the same as a mom. A dad's style is different and children benefit from both styles. Sometime a child is drawn more to one parent. I know my kids love my husband and I both, however, if they had to pick one, I know my oldest son would pick me and my youngest son would pick his dad.

      replyreport
      1. 61

         megs78posted 13 years agoin reply to this

         SO TRUE!  we have 3 kids and our youngest is a daddy's boy.  our oldest is a mommy's girl and the middle child can easily go both ways.  we realize that our childrens personalities have a lot to do with who they gravitate toward and thats ok with us.  of course, mommy is always the 'go to person' for bobos and the like, but papa is the go to for fun and playing and almost always the go between when mommy and kids are having a rough time and he is always there to take up the slack when i am tired.  we are a team and we work well TOGETHER!!!

         replyreport
2. 70

   Cagsilposted 13 years ago

   I would say there's a different kind of bond between a mother and child than there's between a father and child, but I would not say that a child loves one more than the other.

   replyreport
   1. 60

      shop online fastposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      the bond between children and Mothers is different from the bond between children and Fathers.
      
      how is this bond different?

      replyreport
      1. 70

         Cagsilposted 13 years agoin reply to this

         On a sub-conscious level it is different due to the fact that the mother gave birth to the child. It's been proven that a child will learn while in the womb, if the mother reads to it or talks to it.
         
         I know, my two nieces are a prime example of it. My nieces are five years apart from one another and my sister while carrying her first one, read to her and listened to music and talked to her. The second child, she did neither/none of it. The speed of growth between the two with regards to learning is quite different.
         
         So, it has to be recognized on a sub-conscious level there's a bond between mother and child, which is going to be different than father and child. It still doesn't mean that a child loves one more than the other.

         replyreport
         1. 60

            shop online fastposted 13 years agoin reply to this

            wow! interesting take
            
            i'm zooming in on the reading to the children while in the mother's womb.
            
            we read to our first son while he was in the womb, and for crying out loud, he just does not like to read or to do his school work for that matter.
            
            the second son was never read to, while he was in the womb: but now he is the genius of the family.  he loves to read. he is academically brilliant.
            
            same mother and father
            
            what do you think is happening here?

            replyreport
            1. 70

               Cagsilposted 13 years agoin reply to this

               I would be more inclined to wonder what happened after each one was born? My sister kept reading to and with her first before she started school. Again, something she didn't do with her second daughter.
               
               Your situation would be different depending on your actions(parental).

               replyreport
               1. 60

                  shop online fastposted 13 years agoin reply to this

                  after the son was born, he was reading pictures.  he could call every name in his story books.  names such as ball, cake, ice cream, apple, etc.
                  
                  but by the time he went to school something happened.  he started regressing.  it appeared as though he was deliberately acting like "i don't know what an apple looks like"
                  
                  he really doesn't like school work.  he falls asleep, literally, when you call him to do his homework
                  
                  the second son. no problem.  he will sit and do homework all night long if you allowed him

                  replyreport
      2. 60

         JeniferRWposted 13 years agoin reply to this

         Possibly the difference in bond could be contributed to the difference in men and women, or to be specific how men and women maybe differ in handling the child or reactions to different situations. For example my 3 year old LOVES his father, I mean he is insanely crazy about him. Cannot wait to get see to see his father and asks about him constantly because in our specific situation, 'Daddy is the "fun" one'. His dad isn't as much the disciplinary as more the fun parent. In exchange, if my son falls or hurts himself in some way, he only wants me, the mother. He already knows, even at such a young age, that he will get more from me on the affection end of things. Not to say that his father doesn't care if he hurts himself etc., we just handle those types of things differently. Just like, I am the one who disciplines more so if my son wants something he knows he shouldn't be asking for right then, like cookies right before bed or something like that, he goes to his father not to me. Whereas, when it's actually time for bed he wants 'mommy to tuck him in'. Etc.
         
         I don't think it comes down to loving one more than the other, it's just a difference at least in our household of the different characteristics the child receives from the both of us. I hope maybe this might help a little bit!

         replyreport
         1. 60

            shop online fastposted 13 years agoin reply to this

            so jeniferRW?
            
            i wonder if the father had been the disciplinarian, if the child would still re-act the same way to the father.  "daddy is the fun one" etc?

            replyreport
   2. 60

      shop online fastposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      could it be possible that this difference in bond between children and mothers versus children and fathers mean a difference in love?
      
      help me out.

      replyreport
3. 60

   Monisajdaposted 13 years ago

   Most mothers feed, burp, change, put to sleep their babies while fathers do it occasionally or some never. Mother's love tends to be unconditional while fathers like to shower their kids with affection especially if the child accomplishes something. This has been true in my family and many others that I know. Mother will naturally defend her children without giving any thought to it, she will often sacrifice her own sanity, rest to give the best to her offspring. Father, on another hand, even if he is involved and affectionate, wants to meet his needs first and then dot on his kids.
   
   Children are connected to their moms before they are born, they recognize their voice, and learn their smell, touch as soon as they are born. If they are breastfed they are particularly attached to mom's breast or her smell.

   replyreport
4. 60

   Monisajdaposted 13 years ago

   On the note of reading to little ones while still in the womb, I never read to my firstborn while she was there (I was busy working) and she is a great reader and ahead of her peers. My younger one certainly got a lot of reading while she was in my womb because her big sister was asking me to read to her a lot. So the second one is just as interested in books as her big sister and on her way to reading at age of 4.5.

   replyreport
5. 90

   wildernessposted 13 years ago

   My four year old grandson was a daddy's boy from the time he was born.  If mom was holding him and dad came into the room it was goodbye mom, hello dad.  It was so bad that mom had a really hard time actually bonding with him until he was nearly 3 years old - it was just so obvious that dad took first place.  He would even leave mom to come to grandpa - he just didn't really want much to do with women.  He would accept cuddling and loving from a woman, but only if there were no men around.
   
   It's only been the last few months that mom and dad are equal in his eyes or that he will leave grandpa to go to mom when hurt or sad.

   replyreport
6. 69

   Emma Bethposted 13 years ago

   Depending on their personalities and experiences children may find it easier to bond with one adult over the other. However, children also go through phases. At one time, depending on their age and needs they may be strongly dependent on the primary care giver, which tends to be the mother. However, as they grow and change this "favouritism' may change between parents. In terms of development, kids really benefit from close bonds with both mums and dad, as  this provides different experiences for them. ie Mums and dads tend to do different things with their children. ie dads tend to engage in more rough house loud play, while mothers tend to favour quiter activities.

   replyreport
7. 95

   thoughtholeposted 13 years ago

   In my personal experience I would say that it is absolutely false, and nearly backwards to say children love mothers more than fathers. Many a day have I spent listening to my children cry for daddy all the way to school, or as they are upset at me for putting them on time out or the like. Mothers and fathers each share and teach their children important aspects of life. I would venture to guess in most cases there is no love loss toward either party, but instead different experiences and characteristics that they love in one or the other.

   replyreport
8. 60

   somedress2011posted 13 years ago

   when he was a baby ,most of them will love mother more than fathers ,but as they are grow up ,they will think that fathers are their Heros and models ,fathers are teaches most of the time, they theach how can we be a good guy ,mother will take good care of us ,different role they play .
   
   when i am out with my father , i will feel very safe , when i am at home , i can enjoy the delicious food that cooked by my mother .
   
   Different chase ,the children will have different feelings, but i believe that every child love both of their parents.

   replyreport
9. 38

   dresslineposted 13 years ago

   i got a example several days ago , a child love his father more than his mother , and when he is asked to call his mother ,he will called his father's name,and maybe his father is more kind to him and cheat him well, or just stay with he more offen, child will always more like the one who stay with he or her offen .

   replyreport