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Ways to Kill Time: The Dork Meter

Updated on September 15, 2012
Jeannieinabottle profile image

Jeannie has been writing for HubPages for over 5 years. She covers a wide variety of topics—anything from hamsters to office work.

Have you ever wondered if you are a dork?

If you are sitting home right now reading this hub, then trust me, you could be considered a dork or at least "dorkish." I mean, seriously, why else would you be searching for something like this unless you are suspicious that your suffer from that condition known as Dork. Have you ever wondered if you are just a little dorkish or a total dork? Well, have no fear! I am here to help you.

With the Dork Meter, you will be able to rank your own dork-like qualities in no time! I mean, come on... if you are a dork, you probably like taking quizzes anyway. Find out where you rank on the dork meter once and for all.

Please add one point for each YES

1. Have you read all of the Lord of the Rings books? (Does not count if you had to read it for school.)

2. Have you seen the Lord of the Rings movies?

3. Have you read all the Harry Potter books?

4. Have you seen all the Harry Potter movies?

5. Do you watch the SyFy channel?

6. Do you like Star Trek?

7. Do you like Star Wars?

8. If you have ever gone to a midnight opening for a movie, add another point.

9. If you have ever gone to a midnight opening for a movie and dressed like a character in the movie, add yet another point.

10. Do you like the X-Files?

11. Do you read any teen paranormal books? (Yes, Twilight counts.)

12. Have you ever been to a midnight opening for a book? (Yes, Twilight counts again.)

13. Do you like Weird Al?

14. Add another point if you've been to see Weird Al in concert.

15. Do you like pirates?

16. Add another point if you try to speak like a pirate.

17. Do you know how to speak Klingon?

18. Do you know how to speak Elvish?

19. Do you collect Beanie Babies?

20: Do you collect any memorablia from any of the movies or books listed above?

21. Do you play Dungeons and Dragons?

22. Do you play World of Warcraft?

23. Do you play Magic?

24. Do you play Warhammer?

25. Do you collect comic books?

26. Are you 21 or older and live in your parents' basement?

27. Do you spend 20 hours or more of your free time on the computer?

28. Can you build websites?

29. Add another point if you know HTML.

30. Are you a fan of zombies?

Drum roll please...

If you answered yes to at least 15 of these questions, you are pretty dorky. If yes to more than 25, you are a total dork. If you answered yes to all questions and thought of some more questions I should have asked, you are an off the charts total dork.

If you are a little disappointed about being a dork, don't worry, there are some things that cancel that out. You can minus points for things like have a full-time job, graduating college, not living in your parents' house, being hot, dressing fashionably, etc.

Even if you are a dork, who cares? You are probably really smart too! So don't be so sad. Come on over, fix my computer, and let's be buddies! We can debate about the way the Harry Potter series ended all day!

Are You a Dork?

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Submit a Comment

  • Jeannieinabottle profile image

    Jeannie InABottle 5 years ago from Baltimore, MD

    Well, come on, you must be cool and fabulous then! No to every question? Wow! Thanks for checking out my long neglected old hub. :-)

  • fpherj48 profile image

    Paula 5 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York

    jeannie...I could very truthfully answer a loud and firm, "NO," to every single one of your questions. I am the opposite of a DORK and don't bother telling me what that might be, please. It could be worse than a dork and I'm in no mood to feel down and out.

    If you want to lie to me and tell me how cool and fabulous I am...that will be would also be the first time anyone has ever said that!

    Up..........and funny as always.

  • Jeannieinabottle profile image

    Jeannie InABottle 5 years ago from Baltimore, MD

    Congratulations my non-dorky friends! Thanks so much for checking out my hub. Sadly I am a tad dorky myself, but I am OK with that.

  • JayeWisdom profile image

    Jaye Denman 5 years ago from Deep South, USA

    I got one point (I enjoyed the movie STAR WARS.) I also realized what a dork really is! I enjoyed reading this. So I'm not a dork (I'm too non-techie, don't care for fantasy fiction or zombies), but I'm not sure what label applies to me. Maybe I'm just boring!


  • Daisy Mariposa profile image

    Daisy Mariposa 5 years ago from Orange County (Southern California)


    I'm nowhere near being a dork, but I enjoyed reading your Hub.

  • Janine Huldie profile image

    Janine Huldie 5 years ago from New York, New York

    Very cute article Jeannie. I guess I am not a dork only scoring 6 here, but still couldn't help but get a chuckle here. Have of course voted and shared too!!

  • Jeannieinabottle profile image

    Jeannie InABottle 5 years ago from Baltimore, MD

    Daughter of Maat - Hahaha... it is great to embrace your dorkiness. Sometimes I wonder if the dorks of the world are actually the really cool people now. No one wants to be a boring jock or cheerleader anymore, unless of course, they enjoy watching Harry Potter or Star Trek. :-) Thanks for taking the quiz!

    Electro-Denizen - It is great learning new stuff each day. Hey, if you want to be a real dork, then you can totally be one. I think your desire to be a dork makes you an even better dork! :-) Thanks for reading my hub.

  • Electro-Denizen profile image

    Charles 5 years ago from Wales, UK

    That's really depressing. I thought I was a real dork, turns out I'm not with only 7! I don't get that. At least I learned something about myself. :-(

  • Daughter Of Maat profile image

    Melissa Flagg OSC 5 years ago from Rural Central Florida

    lmao ha I read through this as my husband sat on the couch watching Star Trek Voyager!! We're total dorks, the whole family. But we like it that way! Great hub, I was laughing all the way through as I checked off each question! :D

  • Jeannieinabottle profile image

    Jeannie InABottle 6 years ago from Baltimore, MD

    It's OK. I probably wrote this hub on a Saturday night, so we are in the same dorky boat.

  • ThatFatGuy profile image

    ThatFatGuy 6 years ago from Here and there

    19 for me. But i'm a total dork, i'll admit it. The fact it's a Saturday night, 12:30 a.m. and i'm reading through this proves my dorkiness :)

  • Jeannieinabottle profile image

    Jeannie InABottle 7 years ago from Baltimore, MD

    Don't worry; I am a dork too. That was why I had so much insight and was able to write this hub. Thanks for your comment!

  • ladyjane1 profile image

    ladyjane1 7 years ago from Texas

    Nice hub and guilty I am a total dork. Cheers.