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Give Me A Sign--The Surprise That Turned Out to Be a a Gift and Blessing in Disguise

Updated on July 22, 2012
Janine Huldie profile image

Janine is a published author in Only Trollops Shave Above the Knees, appears on The Huffington Post and at Confessions of A Mommyaholic.

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How It All Happened...

Emma Grace was not even 8 months old and sleeping through the night, when it happened. In July 2009, my husband Kevin and I had our first child, a little girl. We named her Emma Grace. I actually prayed right after I found out I was pregnant at Christmas mass 2008, that god would bless us with a little girl. I was always more a girly girl and even babysitting was just more comfortable with girls.

Believe me if I had a boy, I would have loved him with all my heart and soul, but just really wanted a little girl when I first found out. When I prayed, I spoke to my grandfather in these prayers and told him that if I was indeed having a girl, I would pick Grace as her middle name, because that was his sister's name and growing up they were as close as can be. Well, I did indeed have my girl, but that is besides the point here.

In another hub article, I discussed how Emma had colic as an infant for the first few months of her life. She rarely ever slept through the night even once the colic subsided, Emma started to cut her first tooth and that too seemed to keep her up nights. Well, both Kevin and I worked full-time teaching at this point. We are both licensed teachers and spent many nights walking the floors with her and trying to get her to sleep even for a few hours so that we could too.

One day in early March 2010, Kevin and I actually had a free moment to ourselves while Emma napped during the day and we actually were able to spend some quality alone time together even for an hour was better than nothing I suppose. Seriously, I could count on one hand how many times we had sex after having Emma, because of just the craziness of adding a new baby to our lives and her being such a fussy baby to boot.

A few weeks later, we had a family christening to attend. I remember talking to my cousin and another person and they were joking about getting pregnant again and saying that it would probably be easier to have the second now then wait.

Well, I started thinking what if I somehow was pregnant from that encounter with Kevin a few weeks prior. I didn't get my period yet and was due the day after. Panic set in that I could be, because again Emma was not the easiest of babies and we were exhausted from just her.

Later that day, I told Kevin my fears and his first response was no way it was just once. i was less than confident that he was right. I spent that night and the next day at work worrying about this. Kevin told me that afternoon after work to just take a pregnancy test and was sure that would be the end of it to put my mind at rest.

Well lo and behold, I took the test and immediately the double line appeared. I knew from trying to conceive Emma right away what the double line meant, I was indeed pregnant again! Well, I was totally spooked now. I remember sitting with the test in my hand, speechless and in complete shock. Kevin's reaction was that of shock at first, but then once it settled in he was on cloud nine to be having another baby. He was totally supportive, but my hormones were truly getting the better of me now.


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Definitely, Pregnant Again...

Believe me when I say, I always wanted children plural and knew we would have more than just Emma, but at that moment I was so unsure if we were ready again. I was plain scared from knowing how difficult it was having Emma and was nervous about having another baby that could possibly have colic or be just as fussy, when we still had Emma who was a bit of a handful.

Once the shock wore off a bit, I immediately called my doctor to have a blood test to make it official. When I called, he had me come in immediately, drew blood and told me if I was indeed pregnant again that I had some time to decide what I wanted to do. I loved him for saying that and knew that he was right about needing to think things through and make a decision that was best for myself and my family.

Even in the best of circumstances, pregnancy can be very overwhelming. But like I said, we had Emma who was still giving us a run for our money even on a good day. Also, we did not have job security as teachers, because of the economy and the state of educations job at this time. So between the two I was definitely worried about having another baby at this time.


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Divine Intervention: My Grandmother's Final Gift

I decided to take a ride to the cemetery to seek some solace from my grandparents. My grandfather passed back in 1999 (I wrote another hub on this experience) and my grandmother had actually just passed a few weeks prior to me getting pregnant.

Something drew me to the cemetery that cold and bitter March day. When i got there, I remember just kneeling down and the tears started to pour out. I couldn't understand or make out why this was happening right now. And then it dawned on me why I looked to them for answers and why now. I had always felt a bit short changed that my grandfather had gone so quickly and that I was never able to ask him to send me a sign that he was indeed ok once he was gone. I had had this conversation with my grandmother while she was still alive on more than one occasion and she promised me that she would send me a sign every time we did speak about this.

Well, my grandmother had trouble conceiving and only ended up having one child, my mom and told me how blessed she had been to just be able to have a baby. She wished she could have at least had another, but alas it was not meant to be for her. She also knew how much I wanted children (plural again) and knew all I went through to have gotten pregnant with Emma.

At the cemetery that day, it dawned on me that this was my grandmother's sign. She was Ok even though she was no longer with us physically. She not only wanted me to know this, but left me a little something to remember it by. Sounds crazy I know, but to me it made perfect sense. I did miss her so much and when she passed away not quite 2 months prior, I was so hurt and lost yet again by the loss of someone else that I held dear to me. I truly couldn't make sense of her death. She had lived a long and good life, but I still was greedy and would have liked more.

My grandmother's sign was clear, she gave me a chance to have another baby and to have more love and happiness then one could even deserve. I am a little ashamed that I didn't realize it sooner and that I was so scared and on the fence when I first found I was pregnant again. In her death, she brought about new life and who was I to not happily take this last gift that she left for me.

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Thank You For This Precious Gift!

I left the cemetery that day knowing in my heart of hearts that I was meant to be pregnant again now and have another baby. I welcomed it and felt truly blessed. My pregnancy was not an easy one by any means. I ended up being high risk and will safe this sorry for another hub in the future, but on November 23, 2010, Kevin, Emma and I welcomed Lily Ann Huldie into our family. From the moment, I held her in my arms I knew she was meant to be mine and have loved her from the beginning. By the way, she was such a good baby. Again I was truly blessed, not that I wasn't before, but I know in my heart of hearts, my grandmother yet again had her hand in not giving us more than we could handle with having 2 fussy babies.

Emma will now be 3 years old and is such an amazing little girl and for all the sleepless nights she was truly worth it. Lily is on her way to 20 months old and this little girl never stops talking. Guess what my grandmother was the friendliest person you could meet and was always a talker. My mom swears that my grandmother lives inside Lily, because Lily truly has so much of my grandmother's spirit alive in her little body. It is so amazing what a wonderful gift my grandmother gave me and for that I am so grateful and feel like I am the luckiest person alive.

This hub is dedicated to my grandmother, Adele Piacentile 1919-2010, you were an amazing woman and will never be forgotten. We love you and miss you Nana. Thank you for always being there for me in life and death too.

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    • CyberShelley profile image

      Shelley Watson 4 years ago

      Janine, what a wonderful story, thank for sharing this with us. Your Emma and Lily are indeed a blessing. Voted up, beautiful and awesome!

    • Janine Huldie profile image
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      Janine Huldie 4 years ago from New York, New York

      Oh, thank you so much CyberShelley. I love my girls so much and am just so glad to be able to share a bit more of my story with all on Hubpages.

    • TToombs08 profile image

      Terrye Toombs 4 years ago from Somewhere between Heaven and Hell without a road map.

      Great story, Janine! Very sweet, like your daughters. :) VUM.

    • Janine Huldie profile image
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      Janine Huldie 4 years ago from New York, New York

      Thank you so much Ttoombs08, totally appreciate your kind comments and support.

    • teaches12345 profile image

      Dianna Mendez 4 years ago

      You have two beautiful little girls. What a blessing! I know that your grandmother would be proud of how you had faith in their coming into your life.

    • Janine Huldie profile image
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      Janine Huldie 4 years ago from New York, New York

      Teaches12345, thank you so much for saying that my grandmother would be proud and your kind comments about my girls. I do hope that my grandmother is proud of me and truly appreciate your thoughtfulness in your comments and support here always.

    • josh3418 profile image

      Joshua Zerbini 4 years ago from Pennsylvania

      Aww Janine, this was an awesome hub! I love the story, and the pictures of your daughters, they are gorgeous! I love being able to follow your stories and learn more about your exciting journey with Kevin, Emma, and Lily. You guys have been truly blessed and it is a blessing to read about it! I appreciate your sincerity and honesty in your work! Great job here Janine, keep up the great work! Votes as per usual! And sharing!

    • Janine Huldie profile image
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      Janine Huldie 4 years ago from New York, New York

      Oh Josh thank you so much for reading, supporting and sharing. I am really just loving writing about all of these events in my life. May sound crazy but it is so cathartic to just be able to get this all out in a written form. I can't say enough how much I really appreciate all your kindness though.

    • josh3418 profile image

      Joshua Zerbini 4 years ago from Pennsylvania

      No problem, you deserve it! And I am glad I came back because I looked at the pictures again, they are so adorable! I loved everything about this hub, really I did, Janine!

    • Janine Huldie profile image
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      Janine Huldie 4 years ago from New York, New York

      Josh, again thank you from the bottom of my heart for everything. I know I keep saying it, but seriously I just can't thank you enough :)

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      lovedoctor926 4 years ago

      Your daughters are beautiful. You are very blessed. I really enjoyed this story. Voted up!

    • josh3418 profile image

      Joshua Zerbini 4 years ago from Pennsylvania

      You are very welcome Janine, I feel the same way back! :)

    • Kathleen Cochran profile image

      Kathleen Cochran 4 years ago from Atlanta, Georgia

      I have an "All things work together for good" baby as well. He got married this year. Bless your lovely daughters.

    • Janine Huldie profile image
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      Janine Huldie 4 years ago from New York, New York

      Lovedoctor926, thank you so much for kind comments about my daughters and my article in general. It is totally appreciated all your comments and support.

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      Janine Huldie 4 years ago from New York, New York

      Again Josh, thanks and the feeling is definitely mutual!!

    • Janine Huldie profile image
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      Janine Huldie 4 years ago from New York, New York

      Kathleen, time does sure fly. Congrats to your son on his wedding and marriage. Thank you so much for comments and support on my article.

    • Nell Rose profile image

      Nell Rose 4 years ago from England

      Hi, such a lovely story, and your two girls are so gorgeous. It certainly was a gift from your grandmother, I am sure she would be so proud of you, wonderful!

    • Janine Huldie profile image
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      Janine Huldie 4 years ago from New York, New York

      Oh Nell tour comments mean the world to me. Thank you so much for that and your support too. Again, I totally believe in the hereafter and hope that wherever my grandmother is she is happy and proud of me too. By the way, my mom just mentioned that Lily looks like she will be left handed and guess what so was my grandmother. Just another strong coincidence!!

    • Nell Rose profile image

      Nell Rose 4 years ago from England

      We southpaws are the best! lol! my dad was left handed and so am I, so thats great!

    • Janine Huldie profile image
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      Janine Huldie 4 years ago from New York, New York

      Oh love it, Lily is totally in good company it would appear!!

    • Nell Rose profile image

      Nell Rose 4 years ago from England

      lol! thanks

    • Janine Huldie profile image
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      Janine Huldie 4 years ago from New York, New York

      No problem anytime :)

    • Glimmer Twin Fan profile image

      Glimmer Twin Fan 4 years ago

      That was a beautiful hub. Very touching. I think those that have passed speak to us in many different ways in our lives.

    • Sunshine625 profile image

      Linda Bilyeu 4 years ago from Orlando, FL

      I love reading tributes to grandparents and especially grandmothers. Your story is obviously told from your heart. As a granny I feel your grandparents would be very proud of you.

      I also understand about hoping for a girl...I also did and got two plus a granddaughter. Life is good!

    • Janine Huldie profile image
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      Janine Huldie 4 years ago from New York, New York

      Glimmer Twin Fan, I totally agree with you and do believe in their being life after death in some form. Not sure what form though, just have always felt so strongly that both my grandmother and my grandfather have never been far off it that makes sense. Thanks for stopping by and for your comment and support.

    • Janine Huldie profile image
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      Janine Huldie 4 years ago from New York, New York

      Sunshine625, our are totally right that my story is truly from the heart. Not a day goes by that I don't think of my grandmother or miss her. I am glad someone else can also relate to wanting a girl and so true life is good! Thanks you again for your support and comments here.

    • Trinity M profile image

      Trinity M 4 years ago

      Lovely hub. I have one son who is nearly 7 and have been trying for years to have another baby with no luck. I am glad you were blessed with another angel and that you now have two precious gifts and a living sign from your lovely grandmother. Thanks for sharing :)

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      Janine Huldie 4 years ago from New York, New York

      Trinity, she truly was a gift and can tell you with our first we tried for months before conceiving, but Lily was just given to us as though I blinked and I was pregnant again if that makes sense. So I can relate to struggling too to conceive. But I do feel blessed here and hope that you too will be blessed again real soon. Thank you again so much for your comment and support as usual!!

    • rajan jolly profile image

      Rajan Singh Jolly 4 years ago from From Mumbai, presently in Jalandhar,INDIA.

      A truly amazing story Janine. In our country we count begetting a child as a blessing from God and you are you are lucky in that you have the blessings of your grandmother as well. You are blessed to have such sweet daughters.

      Voted Up,beautiful, indeed awesome.

    • Janine Huldie profile image
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      Janine Huldie 4 years ago from New York, New York

      Thank you Rajan. I totally agree that god blessed with with my daughter and also having the blessings of my grandmother. Thank you for your comments and for stopping by too.

    • midget38 profile image

      Michelle Liew 4 years ago from Singapore

      God has blessed you with a beautiful girl, Janine! And know that whatever it is, he'll always be there for all of you. Emma's beautiful! Thanks for sharing.

    • Janine Huldie profile image
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      Janine Huldie 4 years ago from New York, New York

      Oh thank you so much Michelle. I really can't help but agree with you on this and thank god everyday for both my girls and of course my husband too. Thanks again for stopping by and all your continued support!

    • dghbrh profile image

      deergha 4 years ago from ...... a place beyond now and beyond here !!!

      So beautiful daughters and God bless you and your family with all the smiles. I pray for the peace of Grand mother's departed soul. Be happy. Its truly an amazing hub...voted up and sharing with my followers, dear:-)

    • Janine Huldie profile image
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      Janine Huldie 4 years ago from New York, New York

      Dghbrh, thank you so much for you comment, votes and share too. Your kindness here is very much appreciated. Especially want to thank you for the prayers for my departed grandmother.

    • moonlake profile image

      moonlake 4 years ago from America

      Your babies are beautiful. I'm so glad your grandmother sent you a sign. Children are gifts from God. Voted up.

    • Janine Huldie profile image
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      Janine Huldie 4 years ago from New York, New York

      Moonlake, thank you so much for your lovely comment about my kids. I happen to be prejudice, but that is because they are mine lol!! I honestly do believe that Lily was a total sign from my grandmother and not a day goes by where she doesn't do or say something that make me more convinced now. Very much agree about children being a gift from god too. Thank you also for the votes too!!

    • Sunshine625 profile image

      Linda Bilyeu 4 years ago from Orlando, FL

      Awesome and shared once again! :)

    • Janine Huldie profile image
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      Janine Huldie 4 years ago from New York, New York

      Thank you again Linda for saying that and for sharing once again :)

    • rcrumple profile image

      Rich 4 years ago from Kentucky

      Janine -

      What a great story! And your two girls are so precious. I bet they never do anything wrong, do they? (hee hee)

      The spread is about the same as my girls. It's great because when the oldest outgrows her clothes the younger is ready to jump into them. Wait until they grow up and get out of the house. Instead of having kids around forever, within a couple of years, you go from house parent to free parent. It's great having them around when they're young, but it's even better enjoying them when they're gone! But you have a long time before that happens.

      Again, great story. Enjoyed!

    • Janine Huldie profile image
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      Janine Huldie 4 years ago from New York, New York

      Richard, thank you for your lovely words about my girls. You are so right about one growing out of their clothes and then the other growing into them. That is truly a huge perk about about having two the same sex so close in age.

      As for the free parent house, we have a ways off for that, but would settle for a few quite hours here and there. Don't get me wrong, I love my kids, but at 3 years old and 20 months it is never a dull moment. Thanks again and truly appreciate your comment and continued support too!!

    • Mama Kim 8 profile image

      Sasha Kim 4 years ago

      Beautiful hub! I love the honesty, so sweet. Your girls are absolutely beautiful ^_^ We too wanted a girl... then we got the sweetest little boy, kinda girly actually, lol. Things always seem to work out how they're suppose to even if it doesn't seem like it at first... at least thats how it usually goes in my life. Voted a bunch ^_^

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      Janine Huldie 4 years ago from New York, New York

      Mama Kim 8, I thank you so much and tell you I just can't help being honest in my writing, because I am just an honest person by nature. Another lesson that my parents taught me at a young age was to be honest and not to,lie, so that's that :). But I do agree with you about everything having a way of working out in the end and so happy that you too have two beautiful children. Thank you for the votes too :)

    • Eiddwen profile image

      Eiddwen 4 years ago from Wales

      Oh what wonderful hub Janine ;your little ones are so gorgeous and you must be so proud. I also loved the photos of your grandparents ;so warm and happy.

      Thank you for sharing this gem and I am so glad I went hunting through your earlier hubs.

      Eddy.

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      Janine Huldie 4 years ago from New York, New York

      Eddy, thank you for searching through my earlier hubs to indeed find this one and truly appreciate your kind words. I do very much love my little girls to pieces and so blessed to have my family too :) Thank you as always though and just can't say that enough :) :)

    • mary615 profile image

      Mary Hyatt 4 years ago from Florida

      My first two daughters were born 18 months apart, and I know what you went through. I honestly didn't think I would survive. The oldest one had colic and cried all the time, and it was hard dealing with the second pregnancy so soon.

      Your daughters are just beautiful (but then, you knew that).

      Voted this UP, etc.

    • Janine Huldie profile image
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      Janine Huldie 4 years ago from New York, New York

      Thank you so much Mary and you just pretty much described my life with my pregnancies, with my older having colic and my two girls being only 16 months apart. Seriously, sounds like we had a bit in common!! Thank you also for the votes and constant kindness!!

    • rcrumple profile image

      Rich 4 years ago from Kentucky

      Janine, Just wanted you to know that this is indeed a heartwarming story every time I read it. For some reason, it really hit home today. Enjoyed it the second time around even more!

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      Janine Huldie 4 years ago from New York, New York

      Thanks you so very much Richard and I have to tell you I am feeling a bit like that today with it being Lily's 2nd birthday. I just can't believe how far we have come. I truly appreciate you and so happy to be friends with you :) :)

    • ishwaryaa22 profile image

      Ishwaryaa Dhandapani 4 years ago from Chennai, India

      A sweet hub with plenty of memories and nice photos! I always like reading about your wonderful family. You are now the proud mother of two beautiful princesses. Happy birthday to your little Lily!

      Thanks for SHARING. Beautiful & Interesting. Voted up & shared on Facebook

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      Janine Huldie 4 years ago from New York, New York

      Oh thank you so very much Ish for your kind words, birthday wishes for Lily and for the share, votes and share on Facebook, too. Truly appreciate it :) :)

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      Elizabeth Parker 3 years ago from Las Vegas, NV

      Very touching story! I'm sure this has hub can help many people who are feeling the same way that you had during your pregnancy. Voted up!

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      Janine Huldie 3 years ago from New York, New York

      Oh thank you so much and truly hope it does help others who are pregnant or who will be pregnant!!

    • thelyricwriter profile image

      Richard Ricky Hale 3 years ago from West Virginia

      Janine, very inspirational story. It shows how great the "Gift of Life" is. You are certainly blessed. Voted up, awesome, beautiful, and shared on FB. I'm sure your grandmother watches proudly:)

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      Janine Huldie 3 years ago from New York, New York

      Thank you so very much much thelyricwriter and hoping she is indeed looking down and smiling, too now!

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