Old Age Benefits

Hi, Tim...

You're only 41? Bless you, my child, you are a youngster in the scheme of things. Delighted you could relate nevertheless to many of these benefits and alerts.

You are so right. Age is just a number. It is how we feel in or minds. Although good health does help. :)

Good to see you here, Michael. You laughed out loud? What a nice compliment. And thank you for the 'funniest thing' remark. Do come back and study this at your leisure.

Anyone who says my work is 'wonderfully hysterical' is one of my BFF. Thank you for the up, too. I'm delighted you found me.

Nice to meet you, Cousin Fudd. Do you by any chance have a relative named Elmer? Who stutters a bit?

Thanks for visiting and loving my 126-year-old man joke. It is one of my all-time favorites.

I know what you mean, christopher, some days we feel older than others. But I try to ignore it. And finding humor in almost everything I see and hear and read does help. A lot!

Drooling insensiblity, my friend? That will never happen to you with your clever mind and appreciation of fine music, among other things.

Any time I can 'take the sting out of old age,' just give me a call. And thank you for your sublime compliment, I love being a 'Doctor of Laughter Medicine.'

That saying,“it takes twice as long to look half as good” is bittersweet, isn't it, Petra? Probably because it is true. But not for you, m'luv. I see a natural beauty in your bone structure in your avatar that will never be diminished.

But I was born in the Pleistocene Era which makes me at least as old as dirt. What you said is true. I know some older people who are not as sweet and positive as they were when they were younger so I don't hang out with them.

Thank you for mentioning my sense of humor. It is one of my best qualities. And I was delighted to see you enjoyed the “Bud” in front of the “wiser.”

Oh, Lela, you are too funny. And why would you have to look for the old stuff in the first place? You are still a 'spring chicken,' m'luv.

But thank you for the thanks anyway.

Nice to meet you, gmwilliams, and thank you for loving this hub. Yes, the creaks and the aches do creep up on us. I promise not to tell anyone you are 60. But you are still young - at least, compared to me.

I applaud your skill in dancing those 60s and 70s dances - you have to be agile for that. You just keep on trucking and I will never mention your age again. Trust me.

Hi, melpor. What a treat to see you here. Especially since you were laughing the whole time you were rading this hub. What a nice compliment!

You are right. We do have to take care of ourselves if we want to enjoy our old age. So you are approaching 60? So am I, but from the other side! :)

I admire that you can still do more pushups than most teenagers. My greatest pushup is pushing myself up from the dinner table before I eat too much.

As far as growing old, I plan to live forever. So far, so good. Thank you for the visit and the Thumbs up.

Hi, Tina. I agree, if we don't joke about this stage of life when we reach it, we will really feel old. Trust me, I know.

Thank you for your sweet comments. If YOU need another best friend, I herewith apply for the position. Anyone who mentions my humor, curiosity and intelligence is already MY best friend. :)

YESSS! Rosemary, women are only as old as they feel. And men are old when they stop 'feeling.' Right?

Thank you for laughing all the way through this 'wonderful' hub. Delighted you felt 21 again but that's understandable. You don't look a day over 22. Trust me.

Thanks, too, fo appreciating my favorite Sam joke, my sometimes bawdy comments, the video and the cartoons. You are MY kind of reader, m'dear.

Hello, Alastar. You, your sisters, and your visiting friends obviously have superior senses of humor. Smash hit, eh? That comment will keep me going for some time.

Give my love to your sister who 'howled with delight.' She is one of my newest best friends.

Give my regards to your other sister, the stoic one. A dry sense of humor does have possibilities.

And love AND regards to you for your gracious comments - all absolutely veracious, of course. 'Top-rated and A-number one"? Thank you, thank you.

Hi, VioletSun, I think I heard you chuckling to yourself from here. Delighted to know there are others in the universe who also search for their glasses while wearing them as head coverings.

I almost added the Old Age Alert about: 'We can do without sex but not without our glasses.' Decided not to because the only comment I could think of that rhymed ended with the a-word.

Whoa! I think I hear you chuckling again!

Hi, Ruby,

You 'laughed all the way through, funny and true?'

That's ust one of the reasons why I love you!

Thanks for finding that the cartoons were hilarious,

And George Carlin's humor as rare as a Stradivarius.

Like you, I miss him, too.

Thank you for your 'up and away.....'

That is the place I want to stay.

Thank you for agreeing with me, Alicia, that 'there are some very true points behind the humor.' Yes, there will be inevitable changes as we age - but then it's always better than the alternative. Correct?

And you know that I have always believed laughter is the best medicine. I even say so in my profile.

'Funny AND up?' You make my day, Peggy W. You are so right because you echo what I have believed my entire, very old life. Humor and laughter are the best antidotes to aging. Together with a knowledgeable physician. Thank you for the up vote.

Hi, JamaGenee. Thanks for laughing all the way through this hub - that's the end result that pleases me the most.

Yes, by all means, when your grown kids make older jokes, fight fire with fire. Just remind them of the possibility they will get to that all-nighter stage, too.

Just be very careful, my dear, not to alienate them. Remember, our children are the ones who select our nursing home! Heh, heh.

Ooh, bp, laughing through your tears? That's not easy but it is a hallmark I plan to continue to shoot for.

BTW, I have finally figured out what the bp stands for: Brilliant Pundit. Correct?

Thank you, thank you, for the 'Up and funny and awesome!'

That sounds like the lyrics to a wonderful song, Dex -

'Hey, hey, hey, voted up, up and away. Everyone's said what I wanted to say."

Love it! And thank you for that 'treasure' remark which I shall treasure. :)

Welcome to the club, Bill, er ... Phil, er ... wait a minute ... Will! That's it, Will!

It's a pleasure to have you visit, dear Gill. :)

You write the nicest things, Colin, and I'm talking about your comments to me as well as your exceptionally creative epigrams.

"World Class Level," you say. Wow! That's a nice place to be. Thank you, thank you. Being able to switch from the ridiculous to the sublime is what kept me from getting good grades in calculus and statistics ... a long, long time ago. I found those subjects just too serious.

Thanks for comparing the duality in my work to that of George Carlin, my hero. He was the Master. And so are you, epi-man. :)

Hi, Nellieanna. I cannot believe you once felt 'dumpy.' To me, you epitomize all that is elegant and classy - and thin! I think it was the Duchess of Windsor who once said, "You can never be too rich, too conservative, nor too thin!" Amen.

Congratulations on your upcoming 80th birthday, m'luv, I would never have guessed. You have the youngest mind around. And the face and the body ain't bad either.

Delighted to hear that intestinal sluggishness does not plague you - it dwouldn't dare.

Happy you enjoy George Carlin's humor as much as I do. And you are right on the money - there is NO better alternative to living and enjoying life.

Thank you for being entertained and informed by this hub and the chuckles and smiles it produced. Hugs backatcha.

Good to know, Sheila, that you find these benefits and alerts "too true, too true." You are a woman of few words. That's a gift many men might cherish. :)

From your beautiful photo, Martie, you are a lovely, young-looking chick who has yet to reach 'spring chicken' status. You are a long, long way from experiencing the benefits (?) of old age.

Thank you for including that saying which I had not heard before: to wit, 'When will you know you are dead? When you wake up without a pain somewhere in your body. If I can think of enough additional old age benefits, I will add this one to them in Part Two.

What a sweet comment - to be like me when you are fully grown. Just keep on being positive, in love with life, and seeing the humor in everything. You are well on your way!

Yay, I adore that Royal title, Martie. But get up, girl, you don't have to curtsey . . . only everyone else! :)

Thanks for the return visit, Michael. Nice to meet another Carlin admirer. His humor was unique. Is it OK to vote Up again? Hey, it's OK with me.

I appreciate your sharing my hubs with anyone you wish: the kids, other grown-ups, discerning pets, whatever.

Hi, Holle. You and your hubby are still youngsters but sooner or later, all these wonderful (?) benefits will accrue. Now you have had a heads up.

So you waltzed all over my buttons. Felt it from here, my dear. Thank you, thank you. All my love and give my love to hubby, too.

How nice to see you here, Beata, delighted you love this hub and no thanks are necessary. It is entirely my pleasure.

You are a philosopher of positivism, my dear. 'Aging with a smile on your face' is the ONLY way to go.

Awesome . . . wonderful! . . . talented...? You talkin' to ME? You talkin' TO me? You TALKIN' to me? Thank you, Sherry, for those lovely adjectives. You are the nicest, smartest, most beautiful daughter I ever had.

Hi, midnightbliss. What a wonderful name. What visions it conjures up? Thank you for loving my funny hub. Aging can be a wonderful experience. All we need is the strength to handle it. And a powerful sense of humor.

Thanks for stopping by.

What lovely comments, Nellieanna, they could be a sweet hub all by themselves. Isn't it strange sometimes what wonderful life lessons we learn from the most mundane things - such as making and wrapping Christmas presents.

But I must insist again, m'dear, you could never be dumpy - that just does not compute. :)

Hi, bg, Well, you can't be too upset that you were beginning to relate to some of these Old Age Benefits. Not when your Wii indicated you were younger than your kids, coordination-wise. They probably didn't take too kindly to that information.

Thanks for finding this funny and 'Great.'

Hi, fucsia. That Mark Twain really knew what he was talking about. Laughter makes the world go round. Thank you for visiting and describing my hub as 'this funny moment of truth.' What a nice comment, my dear.

Welcome, Ken, the (younger and better-looking) Sean Connery of Canada. Thank you for your sublime, laudatory comments. Now I no longer feel as old as dirt. As old as soil, perhaps ...

Delighted you enjoy my hubs and interviews. Isn't it funny how so many of us can relate to these various old age benefits - especially the glasses on top of the head syndrome? I don't believe for a minute though that you even thought of smacking that insenstivie woman who made such a rude comment. Sean, yes! You, Ken - never!

Delighted that you enjoy my creative antics and hope to be around long enough to create many more. So far, so good. :)

Hi, JRocco

So you're almost 60 - I mean, 40? Your secret is safe with me.

I'm delighted the Carlin video was so meaningful for you. He was something else wasn't he? Thank you for finding this hub terrific and enjoying it.

And since you used the expression, 'You rock!!!!!!,' to describe me, I know you are only 40! Right?

Hi, b. Malin. "Refreshing and laugh-a-minute hub," you say? How discerning of you! Thank you for loving my humor. I love being called 'cool,' so I refuse to answer how old using that term makes either one of us ... the incrimination issue, you know.

Actually, I'll accept 'cool' or 'hot' as long as you don't use the term, 'tepid.'

Hi, Hanna. Thank you for stopping by and enjoying this hub. How can you know what I'm talking about? You are much too young, m'dear - if not in age, certainly in personality and spirit. Trust me.

Knew you would love that fave joke of mine. Delighted I could give you a laugh.

Keith, you are a sweetheart. Thank you for that lovely comment that I "have a young at heart attitude which comes out in (my) writing." I have always believed that about myself and it is a great pleasure to have it confirmed by others.

Yes, laughter is healthy so keep on laughing and you will live a long, healthy life. Promise! Cbeers to you, too, mate. (Didn't know I could speak your language, didja?)

Oh, Dolores, if I made you laugh, then my mission is accomplished. And my dear, you made me laugh when you recounted the tale of riding with a 79-year old 'who scared the wits out of' you.

We have a number of drivers in my neck of the woods who drive like that but I can understand. It may be one of the few 'pleasures' left! :)

Thanks for visiting. Come back any time. What was your name again, dear?

Hi, Hilary - I knew you would love these old age benefits and with your vibrant sense of humor, the wrinkled sock benefit would be most appealing. It's one of my all-time favorites, too. Thanks for making this trip, m'luv.

Thank you, Ruchira, for reading my 'funny hub.' Yes, you will get older, but haggard? No way! If your mind stays active, then your body tries even harder to keep up. Trust me, I know!

What a sweet heart you are, Sally. Thank you, thank you for sharing this on Facebook. We 'not so old broads' need all the help we can get.

Laughing and crying at the same time? Perhaps you should increase your meds. :)

Happy to see you enjoyed my fave joke and cartoon, too. I do appreciate your stopping by.

Oh, James, I so enjoy your visits and comments. You are so spot on: laughter IS good for the soul - and your health, too. Your sweet words brighten up my day even more! As that great sage, Milton Berle, once said: "Laughter is an instant vacation." Amen.

Nope, Kelly, you're too young for those old age signs. You won't start falling apart for another ten to twelve ... months! :)

So your dad had furniture problems. Love that one. You know I'll use it. Somehow. Some way. Some time. Thanks.

What an outstanding comment, Becca. You "laughed yourself silly" reading this? So did I, my love, writing it!

Here's to more hilarity wherever we are fortunate enough to find it.

Dear Erin - Thank you for your lovely comments and taking the time to share some personal info. You are much appreciated. Since you are living with aging parents, you know whereof I write when it pertains to old age (?) benefits.

Delighted to hear that your inner child is ageless. So is mine and so, I believe, is Nellieanna's. Keeps us young at heart. Am I reflective and playful? Yes!!! Mature? NOT! Probably never will be. And thank you, thank you, m'dear for the up!

Thank you finding this amusing, CM. You are so right; old age is not optional. And it's a heck of a lot better than the alternative!

That was a lovely Shakespearean quote. 'Infinite variety' works for me unless it pertains to where did I leave the car keys?

As far as being delusional, that's my favorite state - it makes life so much more interesting. :)

Thank you, Jane, for recognizing how important a sense of humor is especially as we age. And thanks for the compliment. I usually do try to find the funny side of most situations.

Delighted you enjoyed the George Carlin video as much as I do. We could use more of his ironic humor these days. Cheers backatcha m'luv.

Dear pras, you are so right. We are all on the way to old age the moment after we are born. But although growing old is mandatory, growing up is optional. Would you agree?

Thank you for your gracious comments and the up. It is always my pleasure to have you visit.

Hi, tip - your mother-in-law is spot on. CRS has no age limitations. I would write more about that universal ailment but I've already forgotten what I planned to write. Thanks for your kind comments and laughter. You make my . . . er, my . . . uh, well you know what I mean. :)

I am absolutely thrilled to pieces, exquisitely little pieces at that, to learn, Audrey, that you are not blue, annoyed, worried, complaining, angry, depressed, in pain, or tired.

To learn that I have made you happy with my 'funniest hub in town' - thank you, thank you - makes me happy, too. Trust me. But please, dear, don't laugh that hard! :)

Anyone who appreciates my Budweiser comment is my kind of friend, Sunshine. You should feel fine since you are definitely not as old as me yet. No one is that old.

And if you recognize that you are confused, that is a sign that all is rght in your world. It's when you don't know it that you're in trubble with a capital T.

Thank you for the 'fantastic hub' comment. Please be my guest and share it with everyone!

So nice to meet you, Gypsy Willow. Thank you for loving my 'wonderful, funny hub.' That makes at least two of us. And no thanks are necessary; entirely my pleasure, my dear.

That's perfect, psychicdog. So on the mark. You know I'll use it.

O G, I described you to a T?

R U OK with that, ethel, or R U at C?

Thank you, Duchess, what a nice comment: 'a treat to read.' Please remember to come by whenever you can - I just started a new series of funny puns - the first is "Funny Pun - Number One" with Stanley the Snail. And let me know what your mom thinks, too.

Thank you, sweethearts2, for making the trip. Sorry about the added laugh lines but the health benefits of laughter far outweigh any downside. At least, that's what I keep telling myself!

Oh, Derdriu, how lucky I am to have found a commenter such as yourself with such perspicacity and wit to recognize my unique and hilarious combination of artistry, humor, meter and philosophy. Thanks for laughing everywhere. Your comment, m'luv, is rated up!

How nice to meet you here, Glenn. So glad you wanted to find out more about old age benefits. And like you, I believe that laughter keeps us young - at least at heart and in spirit. Will definitely use your phone answer - it has a certain kind of appeal to me.

Delighted I gave you a million laughs and the Sam joke is one of my favorites, too. Thank you for the up, awesome and funny.

What a pleasure to have you back, Audrey. I thought perhaps it was something I said. Or wrote. Or thought. Absolutely delighted that you loved the jokes, the quotes and the Carlin. He was a hoot!

You are spot on about not preferring the alternative. For me, I intend to wear spurs and dig in my heels all the way! Thank you m'luv, for the visit, the up and outta here.

I'm with you, Stephanie, laughter is the only antidote to aging. Though good health does help a bit. You are more than welcome for the laughs and the joke. That 126-year old roue is my kind of guy! Thank you for the multiple 'ups,' you are my kind of commenter.

How nice to see you here, lex123. Thanks for the visit and finding this hub hilarious. Delighted you enjoyed the old age jokes. Laughter is the only way to stay yound at heart!

That is a great line, isn't it? Thanks for loving my hubs and thanks for the joke but I have to admit I'm stumped. I understand the first part but the German guy who hides that TV remote? I haven't got a clue? Help me out, please.

Mea culpa, mea culpa, nemanja. Thanks, I should have guessed. Oh, no, I hope he's not visiting ny home, too. :)

Thank you, nemanja, I feel so much better. It's strange that the name, Alzheimer, never entered my mind. Instead of thinking of German literary names, I should have concentrated on medicine and psychiatry. Appreciate the feedback though.

Nice to meet you, Johan. A 'great' hub is my favorite kind.

Delighted you were able to relate to many of these scenarios, Lizzy. Thanks for traveling here all the way from my "How to Write an Advice Column" hub.

I will check out your "Murphy's Laws of Aging" which is recommended by your husband. Thank you for the gracious comments and the up. Knew you would love that final old age joke with spunky Sam.

Talk about forgetting stuff as we get older, Lizzy - I visited your Murphy hub and discovered I had read it and left a comment previously. Check it out dated 4 months ago. Loved it then and love it now.

Nice to meet you, LL. You are so right. Laughter is the healthy way to handle aging and make the best of it because it is so much better than the alternative.

Thenk you for the visit, the Up and the sharing. Sam says Hello.

Hi, Ariel. What a beautiful name. Delighted you liked the pictures very much - they do add to the hub, don't they? And thanks for the Ha!

How nice to meet you, Sheila. Hope you didn't hurt yourself laughing so hard. Did you show your hubby those old couple pictures? They are some of the funniest I have discovered. Thanks for the visit, the up and the funny.

You might also like to visit 'Old Age Ain't for Sissies.'

Oh, my, mary, did you write what I thought you wrote: "When you are old, it takes you all night long to do what you used to do ALL NIGHT LONG"! You go, girl!

Delighted you loved the photos and Carlin and since everything, as you say, works, then age is only a number. Right? Thanks for stopping by, m'luv, and for the Up and etc. You rock, dear mary.

Oh, my, mary, did you write what I thought you wrote: "When you are old, it takes you all night long to do what you used to do ALL NIGHT LONG"! You go, girl!

Delighted you loved the photos and Carlin and since everything, as you say, works, then age is only a number. Right? Thanks for stopping by, m'luv, and for the Up and etc. You rock, dear mary.

Hi, Michael, pleasure to meet you. Delighted I could warn you about what to expect ... more or less. Delighted to help you start your day in a hilarious way and thanks for the Up and funny. Come back any time.

Voted up & funny. Thanks for starting my day in a hilarious way!

Delighted to meet you, happyboomernurse. So glad you found me re mary's recommendation. Thanks for enjoying this dose of laughter and loving the poem, the graphics and the Maurice Chevalier video. It was special, wasn't it.

Thanks, too, for the Up, funny, awesome and interesting. You do know how to touch all my buttons.

Nice to make your acquaintance, Glimmer Twin Fan. (Interesting profile name, m'dear.) Happy I gave you a great laugh and you are the clever one repeating it.

Thanks for finding this a Funny hub!

No question about it, Lizzy, we both forgot. I had to go check your hub to make sure and lo and behold, I had been there earlier. Mea culpa, m'dear. Got to have that old memory chip replaced. Don't laugh; sometime in the future that could happen.

Now that joke, pd, is even older than me. Just kidding. I love it and will not hesitate to appropriate and share it. Thank you.

Now here's one for you. Older fellow is not feeling well so he goes to his doctor for a complete workup and physical.

The doctor calls him the next day and says, "I have bad news for you. You have only 24 ..."

Fellow interrupts him. "What do you mean, 24? 24 what? 24 months? 24 days? 24 what?"

Doctor replies: " 23, 22, 21, . . . "

Nice to meet you, Esther Strong. Thank you for finding this good fun and loving my profile picture. Me, too.

Happy to make your acquaintance, Johan. You are very welcome. Are you the strong, silent type? Just wonderin'.

Southernmapart, Hi. Thanks for enjoying this. If everyone else thinks you're getting old but you know you are not, then just keep doing what you're doing:

hit the hot spots whenever you feel like it, imbibe but not to excess, and 'make whoopee' whenever practical.

It takes one to know one they say. Thank you.

We have a lot in common, Chris. That's the very same line I always tell folks who complain about aging. It is way better than the alternative. Well said. Thanks for dropping by.