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Autism - I can't even grieve right

  1. Kylyssa profile image98
    Kylyssaposted 15 months ago

    A few days ago, I posted a request to people to do something kind for me. What I asked was for them to just be kind to someone else so I could think of their kindness to someone else and feel there is kindness and hope in the world during a very difficult time. I asked for nothing for myself but the feeling that my request was out there and that maybe it might help someone be more kind to someone else in a world that's awfully hard. I thought perhaps there might be someone who would see my request and it would be just the encouragement they needed that day to be brave enough to do something loving for someone they wanted to help.

    I am autistic. People tell me this makes me no different than anyone else, but that's not the truth. People who aren't would be able to truly talk to people, have their words come out intelligibly (at some point, grief chokes normal people, too), and get some comfort in the flesh. I can't. Talking and trying to be heard is something that happens online for me much of the time. My words just don't come out when I am feeling painful emotions. That's why I asked this here, why I asked people to be kind to other people through HubPages.

    I asked for people to be kind to each other instead of prayers because I am an atheist. Prayers just don't comfort me because, much as I might want to, I don't think God is real. People ask for prayers all the time so I thought asking for a different kind of spiritual comfort was OK, but apparently it wasn't.

    Can someone who isn't autistic please explain what was wrong or offensive about my post?

    1. letstalkabouteduc profile image99
      letstalkabouteducposted 15 months agoin reply to this

      Kylyssa -- Your post and something else you wrote recently inspired me to do a kind act. I purchased lots of tampons and sanitary napkins (along with shampoo, brushes, deodorant, hand soap, etc.) and donated it to our local homeless shelter. You made such an impact on me when you wrote how difficult it is to be a homeless woman having your period. I had never thought about that before, and it really hit me hard. I so appreciate when people like you let me see the world in a new way and help me develop a better understanding. Happy Thanksgiving!

  2. profile image0
    calculus-geometryposted 15 months ago

    Hi Kylyssa, I'm sorry to hear you are going through a difficult time in your life and I hope things get better for you.  To clarify, are you referring to your Q&A post that was removed by a moderator?
    http://hubpages.com/health/answer/27306 … ind-for-me

    I know it's hard to not take it personally, but HubPages Q&A moderators are robotic when it comes to removing questions that don't fit the very narrow Q&A guidelines.  They removed it because they didn't see it as a question that could lead to the creation of a hub, not because it was offensive or because they dislike you. 

    It sounds like a great topic for the forum where people's responses won't be limited to a certain number of characters.  I hope you decide to repost it here.

    1. Kylyssa profile image98
      Kylyssaposted 15 months agoin reply to this

      I thought I'd been offensive somehow and I was really struggling to figure out what. I feel a lot better knowing it's really just that I posted in the wrong area.

      I often say the wrong thing even when I'm not sleep-deprived, physically ill, serving as a caregiver, or deep in grief so it seemed logical I'd do it more often and more thoroughly when I am. All those stresses probably did create the result, but it was just a result of me not really thinking about where posts go.

      I want you to know your explanation took all the hurt of it off me like a blanket of spikes getting lifted off me.

      Thank you.

      1. Marisa Wright profile image98
        Marisa Wrightposted 15 months agoin reply to this

        Kylyssa, I know what you mean.  I am not autistic but I spent most of my childhood fairly isolated from society (due to illness) and as a result, I often don't know how to act in social situations.

        In particular, I seem to have a talent for mentioning "the elephant in the room".

  3. Marisa Wright profile image98
    Marisa Wrightposted 15 months ago

    I agree with calculus-geometry.   The Q&A  section is very misunderstood and personally, I wish they would just get rid of it!

    1. Kylyssa profile image98
      Kylyssaposted 15 months agoin reply to this

      Thank you. I can't make sense of anything right now.