Autism - I can't even grieve right

Jump to Last Post 1-3 of 3 discussions (7 posts)
  1. Kylyssa profile image95
    Kylyssaposted 23 months ago

    A few days ago, I posted a request to people to do something kind for me. What I asked was for them to just be kind to someone else so I could think of their kindness to someone else and feel there is kindness and hope in the world during a very difficult time. I asked for nothing for myself but the feeling that my request was out there and that maybe it might help someone be more kind to someone else in a world that's awfully hard. I thought perhaps there might be someone who would see my request and it would be just the encouragement they needed that day to be brave enough to do something loving for someone they wanted to help.

    I am autistic. People tell me this makes me no different than anyone else, but that's not the truth. People who aren't would be able to truly talk to people, have their words come out intelligibly (at some point, grief chokes normal people, too), and get some comfort in the flesh. I can't. Talking and trying to be heard is something that happens online for me much of the time. My words just don't come out when I am feeling painful emotions. That's why I asked this here, why I asked people to be kind to other people through HubPages.

    I asked for people to be kind to each other instead of prayers because I am an atheist. Prayers just don't comfort me because, much as I might want to, I don't think God is real. People ask for prayers all the time so I thought asking for a different kind of spiritual comfort was OK, but apparently it wasn't.

    Can someone who isn't autistic please explain what was wrong or offensive about my post?

    1. letstalkabouteduc profile image98
      letstalkabouteducposted 23 months agoin reply to this

      Kylyssa -- Your post and something else you wrote recently inspired me to do a kind act. I purchased lots of tampons and sanitary napkins (along with shampoo, brushes, deodorant, hand soap, etc.) and donated it to our local homeless shelter. You made such an impact on me when you wrote how difficult it is to be a homeless woman having your period. I had never thought about that before, and it really hit me hard. I so appreciate when people like you let me see the world in a new way and help me develop a better understanding. Happy Thanksgiving!

  2. profile image0
    calculus-geometryposted 23 months ago

    Hi Kylyssa, I'm sorry to hear you are going through a difficult time in your life and I hope things get better for you.  To clarify, are you referring to your Q&A post that was removed by a moderator? … ind-for-me

    I know it's hard to not take it personally, but HubPages Q&A moderators are robotic when it comes to removing questions that don't fit the very narrow Q&A guidelines.  They removed it because they didn't see it as a question that could lead to the creation of a hub, not because it was offensive or because they dislike you. 

    It sounds like a great topic for the forum where people's responses won't be limited to a certain number of characters.  I hope you decide to repost it here.

    1. Kylyssa profile image95
      Kylyssaposted 23 months agoin reply to this

      I thought I'd been offensive somehow and I was really struggling to figure out what. I feel a lot better knowing it's really just that I posted in the wrong area.

      I often say the wrong thing even when I'm not sleep-deprived, physically ill, serving as a caregiver, or deep in grief so it seemed logical I'd do it more often and more thoroughly when I am. All those stresses probably did create the result, but it was just a result of me not really thinking about where posts go.

      I want you to know your explanation took all the hurt of it off me like a blanket of spikes getting lifted off me.

      Thank you.

      1. Marisa Wright profile image97
        Marisa Wrightposted 23 months agoin reply to this

        Kylyssa, I know what you mean.  I am not autistic but I spent most of my childhood fairly isolated from society (due to illness) and as a result, I often don't know how to act in social situations.

        In particular, I seem to have a talent for mentioning "the elephant in the room".

  3. Marisa Wright profile image97
    Marisa Wrightposted 23 months ago

    I agree with calculus-geometry.   The Q&A  section is very misunderstood and personally, I wish they would just get rid of it!

    1. Kylyssa profile image95
      Kylyssaposted 23 months agoin reply to this

      Thank you. I can't make sense of anything right now.


This website uses cookies

As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at:

Show Details
HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the or domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)