How do I live with an alcoholic . l am afraid to leave.

1. 49

   pattyhposted 9 years ago

   How do I live with an alcoholic . l am afraid to leave.
   
   He likes to pick on me and is hard to live with . need help

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2. 93

   poppyrposted 9 years ago

   I suggest getting professional help for your problem, such as domestic abuse hotline for your area, or Alcoholics Anonymous.  What country are you in?
   http://www.thehotline.org/  (also have an online chat option)

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3. 71

   Baby-Boomer-58posted 9 years ago

   Make the decision to go. Then ask your friends and family to help you.
   
   Come up with a plan to leave safely, and keep your focus on creating a safe and happy future for yourself.
   
   Good luck.

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4. 52

   Lostinagonyposted 9 years ago

   I am in a similar situation, I love my wife to pieces, but I have recently realized that the way I love her is not good, for her or myself, any person with an addiction really does not comprehend emotional common sense, they have a deep uncontrollable desire to seek out a substance to numb the pain of the reality off their life from there perspective that has been instilled in thier core beliefs about them selves for reasons they don't even know, and they will never know until they choose to. I recently attended a retreat center that thought me how to process my core believes about myself, and it was amazing, I didn't stay there as long as I had planned but that's okay cause I can always go back. In this life of ours we have had experiences all the way back to birth, and through these experiences, good and bad, we have developed a set of core beliefs that we actually follow subconsciously some are good and some are detrimental to our life's. In my case I have a core believe that I am not worthy of love because of an experience I had at age nine, through this experiences I developed the belief that I am not worthy if love so for the last 30 odd years of my life I have based all my sections on the belief that I am not worthy, so I would seek out relationships and jobs and friendships that would reinforce this belief I had about myself that caused me to search out relationships and jobs that would seek approval, and when I got the approval my core belief would kick in and say you don't deserve this so I would subconciously destroy those relationships and jobs, I have since learned that this is why I have married an alcoholic because I am searching for approval or love that is unattainable because subconsciously I don't deserve it, well let me tell you I do deserve it and realizing this has helped me move forward in life and be healthier, in short you are where you are because you believe you should be, dig deep and find what your core beliefs are and how you developed them and than ask yourself is that true did you believe that about yourself and why, and now being an adult and being able to think clearly would you have imposed that belief on yourself because if that experiences and than change that believe by literally telling yourself it's not true. Focus on what your specific needs and wants I'm life are and ask yourself what's stopping you from getting what you want and deserve and when you can answer that question change what is stopping you. Your belief

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