How do you deal with them? Especially if it's someone close to you.
I would complain back. People sometime can't see the affect on others unless they experience the same thing. Called 'give them a taste of their own medicine'.
I think we all need to complain from time to time, because it is human nature, and frustration can be eased by a good old moan. If someone is complaining all the time though, I would think that they are suffering from depression, and may need a listening ear and some advice. I have listened for hours to people who need to complain, and have offered the best advice I can. I also realise that it could very well be me in need of complaining in the future and would hope they would offer me a listening ear in return.
I hear you Valeman....it's good to give a listening ear. I suffered from depression and I still have my moments. Sometimes....when someone is negative about everything and if you listen to it everyday....it drives you up the wall. I understand that we are human and it's our nature but when it is impossible to have a normal conversation with someone....it gets to be too much.
in the infamous words of the Doctor, "RUN"....... Seriously though, it depends on your relationship with the person. Some people you can escape from, but it's not always so easy. Sometimes, you can be frank with them. I find that a lot of the time they feel insulted, because they don't realize what a downer they actually are being, so some sensitivity may need to be practiced. Really we are each responsible for our own happiness, so empowering someone else to take more charge of their life, ideally should help raise their self esteem.
My ex had 8 personalities. I had 8 women in one and could not be prosecuted for polygamy. I would just listen, more entertainment in an hour than without in a year. But when negativity gets to be too
much - you got put a stop to it.
What a coincidence! I have just recently broken off a relationship with a girlfriend of more than a decade, mostly because of this very issue.
Women do love to commiserate with each other, and I've done my share of complaining to girlfriends, but this lady has gotten to where she doesn't do much else except whine about how everybody mistreats her. It finally just got to be too much for me.
Plus, I had felt sorry for her over the years and loaned her money, etc, which she never repaid. I wish it hadn't taken me so long to figure out this was a "victim" I didn't need in my life.
Good luck to you Sassy, in deciding how to deal with your chronic complainer.
I know I used to complain all the time, but hearing someone else complain about everything has really opened my eyes to how my complaining brought others down. I have learned to change what you can and accept what you can't, not to say I don't complain, just not as much.
I think avoiding them is the way to go. Life is short and we should aim to surround ourselves with positive people that bring out the best in us and hopefully we can to the same for them. Compulsive complainers keep us in a negative place, they are stuck and probably won't change.
I hope I am not complaining about this..lol.
ask them to look at the other side. I complain at times too but then mentally I see and can almost touch the light at the end of the tunnel.
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