Is it okay to give someone a wish list to use when gift shopping for you?
Gift shopping can be difficult; would you be insulted if someone gave you a wish list to help you shop for them?
I think that it's great to have a wish list to use as a reference when getting and giving gifts. I do, however, think that it is more fun for the giver and receiver of the gift if you are more general on your wish list. For example, I think it is better to put "slippers-size medium" as opposed to typing out the specific brand, color, and store for the slippers. If you are after something that specific, it is probably better to just go ahead and buy it yourself. It is way more fun to have a little bit of mystery in gift-giving.
The best way to do it is to enroll at the gift registry offered by some department stores. You can choose the gift items you would like to receive. Once enrolled, you will be given a discount card which you can distribute to your guests informing them to buy gifts at discounted price at the department store where you are registered. The discounts only apply to the items you have chosen.
I would never give anyone a wish list unless they specifically asked for one. My husband and my mother-in-law are the only ones that ask, and even then I am careful to put just a few items of modest budget, and I also am sure to add 'but these are just ideas, please don't feel compelled to get something from the list'. If someone gave me a wish list without my asking them (I do ask my husband and mother-in-law for their wish lists), but if someone gave me one WITHOUT me asking, yes I would be insulted. I would try to handle the situation gracefully but make no definite commitment to the gift list, e.g. I would say to the person handing me the list "Thank you for this list, this will give me some helpful ideas. However, it's quite possible I might come up with my own ideas while out shopping."
The only two situations where I would be entirely OK if someone gave me a wish list to choose from would be a) a wedding (but not a second or subsequent wedding) and b) a baby shower (but only for a first baby).
I think gift giving has change a lot over the years. I would not want a wish list because it is making it more like a business transaction - why not just hand them cash? If I know an occasion is coming up and I know the person well, I can think of something they might like.
I have varied thoughts on this question. I feel that if the wish list is reasonable enough (price wise), then I don't think that it is a bad idea. The gift giver can pick which gift they want to buy off of that list because they know that is what the receiver would want.
However, I do agree with some other people when they have answered that it is like a business transaction. I think if someone wants to give a gift but doesn't know what to give, then they can give cash or gift cards to that person. If they are close friends they can just ask them what they really NEED and buy it for them.
That is a great question!
I would say yes, especially if it is a husband. I might not necessarily write it down, but I have been known to print out pictures and circle items in a store ad, and hang hints on the refridgerator. This came about years ago, after receiving a windshield sun shade for my 25th birthday. I have never let him forget it either.
by Meredith Loughran 11 years ago
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Make a wish list
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