25 Reasons You Should Marry a Writer
- Writers are like nuns, they have taken a vow of poverty.
- You will get endless love letters.
- They are used to being broke and therefore not super materialistic.
- They are excellent communicators, speaking in thesis, bullet points, and conclusions.
- Their conversations are poetic, descriptive, and full of similes and metaphors.
- They will not use expletives when arguing, they know how to "use their words."
- Don't worry about them being too clingy; they love alone time to write.
- They can quote you a sonnet.
9. They will write all of your Christmas cards, thank you notes, and proposals.
10. They are masters of plot and can explain the ending of Memento or Inception if you are a normal person just don't get it.
11. They are highly analytical and can solve your emotional and inner-personal problems, just like they do for the characters in their novel.
12. You really don't have to entertain them, they are good at entertaining themselves, often creating whole worlds to enjoy at their own disposal.
13. When unexpected bad things happen, they rejoice because it gives them great writing material. Getting stuck in an elevator, lost in a ghost town, or finding out the hitchhiker you picked up was on the CIA's most wanted list, might be the best thing that ever happened to them.
14. They are very quite people, often wanting hours of alone time to type away, distraction-free. Go shopping, watch the ball game, or tinker on your car—you won't be interrupted.
15. They want to go everywhere and try everything in the name of research. Go watch a mud derby? Heck yes! Spend a month in the French countryside? Do you even have to ask?
16. You will be thoroughly entertained by watching them do "research." They may spend hours researching how to rob a bank or laying on the tombstones at the local cemetery—just to see how it feels. Don't think it awkward when they ask to interview the head of security of your local airport because they want to know how to hijack an airplane—again, it's for research.
17. Your children will ace A.P. English, but may need a math tutor—unless you can help out.
18. They work really odd hours—and if you ask really, really nicely—they might be free to pick up your sweater at the laundromat. Consider yourself very lucky for marrying someone who abhors the 9-5.
19. They have writer friends from all over the world and can probably get you free copies of your favorite books—in return for a short review on Amazon.
20. When their book is turned into the next blockbuster film, you will get tickets to the movie premier.
21. They are obsessed with ideas, knowledge, and figuring out how the world works. They are very keen observers and will keep you entertained with hours of interesting conversations about aliens, the apocalypse, and what it's like to love a vampire who wants to be human so he doesn't have to live forever as a bloodsucking villain.
22. They are just plain strange.
23.They have their own unique style and don't have to shop for a Halloween costume—they've got plenty in their closet.
24. They are very "in the moment" type people—very stop and smell the roses type. They take careful notice on how a flower closes at sunset, how the light cascades through the glass of the cathedral, and how the cement smells after it rains. You'll get more out of life too.
25. If you marry a writer you will have a life of rich language, imagination, and words that will change you from the inside out. They know how to say the right words to make you feel better, cheer you up, and encourage you to be your best.
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