Funny Pun about the Head
The Head
John was so happy
At everyone he smiled.
His wife was delivering
Their very first child.
His joy was short lived
He soon had to mourn.
His wife had expired
When his son was born.
But the boy survived
Just one problem, y’know.
He had no legs . . .
No arms . . . no torso.
There was just a head,
Handsome, it’s true,
But no other parts
Which ever grew.
John loved his son
And kept him alive
Because of his love
The Head did thrive.
John taught his son
In his home school.
He kept him at home,
Kids can be so cruel.
He fashioned a box
With a one-way screen.
The Head could see out
But no one could see in.
John took his son with him
To all sporting events
Football, baseball, tennis,
He spared no expense.
The Head loved movies
He knew all the stars.
He enjoyed the races,
Whether horses or cars.
Before very long
The Head was twenty-one.
John was so proud
Of his only son.
Let us celebrate,
You are a man, I see.
We will go to a bar
Your first drink is on me.
John ordered a whiskey
The patrons and bartender were in awe
Watching a Head drinking
Was the strangest thing they ever saw.
The Head made a face
At the whiskey’s taste
But drank it down
Without a smile or frown.
The weirdest thing happened
They all gave a big shout
Do you know what it was?
The Head’s torso popped out.
They all were in shock,
How could this be?
John begged his son
Drink another for me.
The customers all chanted
Drink, drink, drink!
So John’s son had one more.
And what do you think?
Two arms popped out.
The people went wild.
The son drank one more
No longer a child.
You know what came next
Two legs popped out.
Everyone in the bar
Gave a tremendous shout.
The bar was in chaos
Some patrons were praying
John’s son was now tipsy,
His body was swaying.
He stumbled through the door
Trying out his new legs
He almost fell on the floor
It was like walking on eggs.
He lurched and he staggered
And fell into the street.
Where a two-ton truck hit him
And made him mincemeat.
Everyone in the bar
Was shocked beyond belief
John fell to the ground
Devastated by his grief.
The bartender sighed
And this is what he said:
“That boy should have quit . . .
. . . While he was a Head!”
I am an incorrigible punster. Maybe you should not ‘incorrige’ me.
© Copyright BJ Rakow, Ph.D. 2011. All rights reserved. Author, "Much of What You Know about Job Search Just Ain't So" Amazon.com
Punny Books
More from Bad to Verse
- Funny Pun - Number One
Are puns the lowest form of humor? Who cares? I love them. Read about 'Stanley the Snail.' Didja know he was a hermaphrodite? - Funny Pun – Number Two
Did you know that Leo the Lion was involved in the study of immortality? So were seagulls. - Fear of Flying or Aerophobia
Fish gotta swim and birds gotta fly. Not me. I have a fear of flying. It's called aerophobia. - Interview with Lady Godiva
Listen, my friends, no secrets will I dare to hide. About our dear Lady Godiva’s very strange ride. - Psychic Vegetables and the Things They Have Told Me
Actually, the vegetables are not psychic, just a little bit strange. And strangely, the psychic is me.
Comments about Funny Pun about the Head
OMG! drbj! your humour is way over my head! Regards, snakeslane
- Author
Way over your HEAD, eh? You are my kind of commenter, snakeslane. Thank you for being the first.
Shocking! What is the world coming to when a good head can't have a drink without being punished for it?
Oh my, my head is spinning over your punny poems.
haha yes I do like this one.
He should have kept his head instead of getting legless and gaining his legs.
I'm not sure if I'm making sense anywhere today.
Ouch!!! That was cruel, drbj...and yet I head for every hub that you write! :D
- Author
It is shocking, Wrath. Things aren't bad enough economically without this added punishment. Loved your line: "What is the world coming to when a good head can't have a drink without being punished for it?" Thanks for the visit and the 'bon mot.'
- Author
So your head is spinning over my punny poems, Becky. That's even more than I could hope for, my dear. Thank you.
- Author
Cruel, eh, Feline, And yet you 'head' for every hub that I write! Ah, that was a good one, m'luv. Touche!
- Author
Do not worry about making sense on one of my 'punny' hubs, Rosemary. Why should you? I don't! Thank you for your comments and liking this one. I like you, too.
After this - they need to have a wild! Button!
That was super entertaining and my eyes were glued to word after fascinating choice of word....all the way to the fascinating end!
My step dad was the kind of guy who - if you'd lost a leg - he'd say be happy you got another one.....look at the people who have none....now here's a case of someone who would be hard ta beet! LOL.
LOL!! I'm beginning to worry about your mental health, my friend. Voted up and funny.
- Author
HP needs a 'wild' button, Kelly? That's one of the nicest things you ever said to me. Thanks for visiting, your choice of the adjective, 'fascinating,' and including that touching remark of your stepdad.
- Author
Do not worry, Holle, the state of my mental health is indisputable. If it weren't for those strange voices, I would have nothing to write. Heh, heh. Thank you, m'luv, for the up and funny. So are you.
Yes I'm contacting hub team immediately to request a wild button!
This is one of the most moving stories every told. It's not every piece of poetry that evokes both tears of laughter as well as tears of sorrow. And 10 points for avoiding any mention of the song, "I ain't got nobody". I'm also a sucker for rhyming poetry (a lost art these days) so bravo Doc. I think you have a keen head on your shoulders.
Voted up and hilarious - and why didn't I see that one coming?
Great job, BJ~!
The doctor was definitely in the house today! You have a head start on the rest of us, but I fear we are all heading in the same direction - your poetry reminds me of a favorite hymn "Over my head, I hear music in the air..."
Cheers!
Funny and tragic--good thing --it's just a poem. You've do have a knack for inventing these hilarious poems--love it and love it.
Wow! Brilliant! I'm in awe. Probably because I knew a head like that. Only he was a boy who had developed into a head, then he changed into a boy again because he drank too much. So the community hit him and made mincemeat of him. Your head in here was born a head. Now that makes this pun a tragedy. Bravo drbj! This is but only my interpretation of this excellent pun of yours. Perhaps I've seen only the ear of this hippo-of-a-pun?
I could just see this story unfold in my head as it went along. It's different, but very witty!
Didn't see that Ending Coming...So glad I stopped by to read #3...I now feel like I'm a HEAD for a while!
OMG, This is soo funny.
I do wish the head had only drank wine
With his new found organ
The Girls 'wooda' stood in line.
It is a sad story really. Gave me a headache. What a way to go!
Hi Dr. BJ! Well, I thought I would get a head-start on bed tonight but this will keep me up and laughing for awhile!!
My friend, you make me smile again. I love the way you share between funny and tragic at the same time. Again, you have done a great job. Rated up and have a nice weekend!
Prasetio
- Author
Yes, by all means, Kelly, do request a 'wild' button. But perhaps you shouldn't mention my name. They already think I am!
- Author
I knew that you, Hilary, would appreciate the bathos and pathos represented by this remarkable tale. Thanks for reminding me of that great song I neglected to include. Probably because I didn't want to exacerbate poor John's grief. I will accept the 10 points though.
Thank you bunches for your visit and your outstanding approbation. A keen Head, eh. Takes one to know one, m'luv.
- Author
Thank you, Audrey, for the up and hilarious. I feel the same way about you. May even dedicate a future pun to your Mals. Delighted you didn't see this one coming - makes it all the more fun. ;)
- Author
Love your clever comment, Elle, you are miles ahead of the rest of us jumping headfirst and headlong into the fray. Have to stop now, I'm getting a headache.
- Author
Thank you, anginwu, for appreciating my combination of comedy and tragedy and loving my 'hilarious' poems. It's either a knack or a kneurosis.
- Author
A hippo-of-a-pun, Martie? Oh, my dear girl, you may have gone over the edge. Welcome to my world. I will make sure you get the room next to mine with the extra padding on the walls. Thank you for the brilliant and the bravo - you are soooo perceptive.
- Author
Gee, mary, if you saw this story unfolding in your head, you are as witty and different as me. Welcome to the cell next to Martie and me. And thanks for stopping by.
- Author
Hi, b. Yup, the ending does kinda sneak up on you. I'm glad you stopped by, too. Like I always say, it's so much better to be aHead than to be Behind. Right?
- Author
Oh, Ruby, your comment was so risque,
I just do not know what I should say.
Oh, yes, I do.
Thank you! thank you!
Because you are so very clever,
I am now in your debt forever. :)
- Author
I'm so sorry this sad short story of the Head's sudden demise gave you a headache, christopher, my dear. I'll try to cheer you up anon with funny pun #4.
- Author
Hi, Dex.
Do regret that I delayed your head-start on sleepy-time. Do hope that you slept well despite this gruesome rhyme.
Thanks for the laughter.
- Author
Dear pras - it is always my extreme pleasure to make you smile. Just as it is my pleasure to have you visit me. Thank you. And you have a glorious weekend, too.
(groan)
These are the worst (and funniest) puns I have ever had the misfortune to read!
- Author
You are my hero, Will. You did and said everything an avid punster could hope for: a groan ... and a comment: "worst and funniest ..." Thank you!
OMG that funny!
- Author
Thank you, Susan. for your short but sweet, succinct 'funny' comment.
drbj: Ouch!
Thank you, voted up, etc.,
Derdriu
- Author
I like 'Ouch!', Derdriu, almost as much as I appreciate groans. Thank you for the visit and the up, m'dear.
Hi Dr,
I've been reading a lot of hubs today and finally, FINALLY, I truly laughed out loud. Has anyone told you that you are a nut? A fun nut that is!
Sharyn
- Author
Finally laughed out loud, Sharon? What a fabulous compliment. Do peruse the other five funny puns for more chuckles, m'dear.
Haven't been called a genuine nut ... yet. But a nutcase? Too many times to mention.
I tried not to, but I laughed anyway. You are a twisted punster.voted up!
- Author
A 'twisted punster,' Docmo? That's the nicest thing you ever said to me. Thank you for laughing and the up!
I should have seen that coming. Hook line and sinker. lol. Very nice.
- Author
Did I really 'gotcha,' Jim. That made MY day. Thanks for the visit and the appreciation.
Yes. You did. :)
Better to be a nice head than 4-limbed and dead. Don't cross the street in the middle of the block!
- Author
Now you tell him, Gerry. Where were you when the Head needed you? Thanks for the visit. Your comments are always appreciated.
This is a delight. Well written and humorous and effective language for visual representation. Thanks!
- Author
What a lovely literate commenht, ytsenoh. Thank you for your visit and approbation. They are both equally appreciated. It's my pleasure
Wow, this was a captivating story, and it provoked various emotions from happiness to sadness... And what a moral! I laughed in the middle, cried at the end, but now I am stunned because it so damn true - We seldom use our heads while we have it... or do we really have heads?
We live/drink life/wine until Fate turns us into mincemeat, and then we realize we were in fact @ssholes....
I could see this like a movie - the popping out of the body, arms and legs... Hilarious!
Voted up and funny, but also thought-provoking :)
- Author
You are correct, Martie, this was one of my more philosophical punny creations fashioned to provoke both happiness and grief in the reader. Thank you for understanding its preternatural profundity.
Your comments have inspired me to ponder on the possibility of creating an animated film - something in the nature of 'Pinnochio' to emphasize the mundane morality to say nothing of mortality inherent in this play on words.
But all these long words are making my head hurt, so I will end for now and just say that you, my dear, are thought-provoking. Oh, and thanks for the funny and the Up. You ARE a dear.
O my....do you have a book(s)? These 'punnies' (sorry) need to be assembled into a collection.....thanks for sharing.
Have a lovely rest of the weekend
Angels are on the way :) ps
- Author
I have thought of creating two or three new ebooks, Patricia - one for my funny puns and one or perhaps two for my supernatural interviews. Thanks for prodding me with your sweet suggestion. May you have a lovely rest-of-the-weekend, too.
59