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NOT OLD - YOUTHFULLY CHALLENGED!

Updated on April 27, 2013
SENSIBLE SHOES?
SENSIBLE SHOES?
STAGE FRIGHT?
STAGE FRIGHT?


Waking each morning with joints talking BACK,

From deep in the chest - a wheeze and a HACK!

A glance in the mirror - a new facial CRACK,

Flesh once young now mottled and SLACK!


Bursting to piddle, woke twice in the NIGHT,

Risked missing the bowl - diminishing SIGHT!

Once safely mounted, plagued by a fresh PLIGHT,

The once-bursting bladder - now suffers STAGE FRIGHT!

MEDS REPLACE SEX..
MEDS REPLACE SEX..
CHOCOLATE CAKE OR SEX?
CHOCOLATE CAKE OR SEX?


The Doctor, the Dentist - the UROLOGIST,

Retired, thank God, cause The Boss would be PISSED!

What's this on my tushy - a new 'hemmy' or CYST?

One more lovely question to add to THE LIST!


Meds replace SEX as the favored DISCOURSE,

Fornication no longer the mind's driving FORCE.

Please don't misinterpret - there is some REMORSE,

But cake for dessert is a HUGE pleasure SOURCE!


YOUTHFULLY CHALLENGED
YOUTHFULLY CHALLENGED


Hush Puppies and walkers - can't kick like a FLAPPER,

Light up the night - with that shiny new 'CLAPPER'!

Stylishly dressed in jammies and WRAPPER,

Easily shed on the way to the CRAPPER!


And yet there's no question, with all of life's WOES,

Still much to achieve - whence mobility SLOWS.

Should this flower wilt - another one GROWS,

The fact of the matter is: THAT'S HOW LIFE GOES!


(Not Quite) The End...


GEORGE CARLIN ON GROWING OLD...

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    • Deborah Brooks profile image

      Deborah Brooks Langford 4 years ago from Brownsville,TX

      Leslie.. THIS IS MY LIFE..LOL.. thank you sweetie for making me laugh.. well maybe i will cry.. My husband is mad at me.. wont talk I feel like a widow.. and my aches and pains seem like a crime.. lol

      love you girlfriend

      sharing of course.

      deb

    • FyrFytr234 profile image

      FyrFytr234 4 years ago

      LMAO! You've outdone yourself again! This might be the funniest hub you've ever written. Had me LOL from top to bottom. Hemmy? LOL. Also the "stage fright" and chocolate cake pictures. And Carlin is perfect. My god K, you never cease to amaze me, impress me, and make me laugh. Well done young lady. I think it's one of your best. And useful as well...but not yet! Thumbs up and shared already.

    • wayne barrett profile image

      Wayne Barrett 4 years ago from Clearwater Florida

      This is hilarious. And to top it off with, Carlin. Perfect!

    • AudreyHowitt profile image

      Audrey Howitt 4 years ago from California

      Highlarious!!

    • Just Ask Susan profile image

      Susan Zutautas 4 years ago from Ontario, Canada

      LOL! This one's a keeper for sure ... pinning and sharing and voting way up and more.

    • xstatic profile image

      Jim Higgins 4 years ago from Eugene, Oregon

      Another great one... something to look forward too... I guess!

    • billybuc profile image

      Bill Holland 4 years ago from Olympia, WA

      Not only hilarious but oh so true. :) I can relate, Sis! I can relate.

      love you

      bill

    • profile image

      Vincent Moore 4 years ago

      OMG not was this only funny it was highlarious indeed, I too almost shyt and pissed myself reading and watching my favourtie comedian RIP dear Georgie Carlin your the greatest, nobody can top your humor. You outdid yourself with this brilliant piece my friend. A true comic you can be, have you thought about doing stand up comedy? Heck you would have everybody rolling in the aisles. LoL Voted up and shared.

    • profile image

      lovedoctor926 4 years ago

      Meds replace sex. lol. You're a trip! Well-done and very entertaining. Voted up!

    • bravewarrior profile image

      Shauna L Bowling 4 years ago from Central Florida

      Yep, that's how life goes! You gotta laugh and you gotta love it, if others don't like it, they can all go and shove it!

      Great tribute to the aging process, Leslie! If only our bodies could stay as young as our minds.....

    • tobusiness profile image

      Jo Alexis-Hagues 4 years ago from Bedfordshire, U.K

      Oh boy!.. you got that right, the story of my life these days. Brilliantly funny, many of us relate only too well.

      Up and sharing everywhere.

    • carol7777 profile image

      carol stanley 4 years ago from Arizona

      OMG...Is that the way life has gone???? Oh no. Well I played Pickleball for two hours today..However I am tired....Darn why can't we start out old and work our way back.. All funny, true and so well written as always....YOu do have magic words.

    • drbj profile image

      drbj and sherry 4 years ago from south Florida

      Every hilarious word, ImKarn, is a gem and I'm still laughing as I type. You have captured the essence of growing old too well. And I should know having grown up in the Pleistocene Era. Brava, m'dear.

    • jacharless profile image

      Charles James 4 years ago from Between New York and London

      LMAO.

      Best Rap song heard in years.

      Put this to music, on YouTube, and you'll go Viral (in a good way) in minutes!

    • JayeWisdom profile image

      Jaye Denman 4 years ago from Deep South, USA

      Ah, Leslie...Thanks to you, I have a new phrase with which to describe myself: "youthfully challenged!" This description should blend nicely with my other life challenges: I'm not lame, but "mobility challenged." I'm not short, but "height-challenged." I'm not dense, but "technologically challenged." I could go on, but might depress myself!

      I certainly recognized several aspects of my daily/nightly existence in your funny new poem. Thanks for making it laugh-out-loud hilarious. It's so much better to laugh than to cry about these changes, even if it promotes more wrinkles!

      Voted Up++

      Jaye

    • Rosemay50 profile image

      Rosemary Sadler 4 years ago from Hawkes Bay - NewZealand

      This is incredably funny, laughed all the way through. Yep thats how life goes.

    • ahorseback profile image

      ahorseback 4 years ago

      What fun it would be to have a hubber party with you and all the others Leslie ! I could see myself laughing to tears ! And You.......You party animal ! You're so funny !......Ed

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      Wrath Warbone 4 years ago

      So true! lol. Terry

    • Faith Reaper profile image

      Faith Reaper 4 years ago from southern USA

      Getting old is not for sissies, is what I heard someone say once, and now can relate!

      So funny, but sadly a lot of reality there. Very clever write.

      hahaha Voted up +++ and sharing

      Hugs, Faith Reaper

    • wetnosedogs profile image

      wetnosedogs 4 years ago from Alabama

      This is a great laugh. I won't add more cause I'd just give myself away.

    • web923 profile image

      Bill Blackburn 4 years ago from Twentynine Palms, California

      C'est la vie, C'est la vie, C'est la vie! Such is life, but you have a way of a mixing Romanticism, Humor, Sarcasm and an unrivaled Blunt Thumping Directness, and then delivering it with the Charisma and Style of a ballet dancer and Military Commander combined. You definitely are (1) in 70 billion Leslie, and my hat's off for another awesome Tub... (oops Hub; I meant Hub!)

    • profile image

      Sueswan 4 years ago

      Hi Leslie,

      It was just another ordinary Monday until I read your poem. ROFL

      Voted up and away and sharing!

    • DanaTeresa profile image

      Dana Strang 4 years ago from Ohio

      O M G ! how i LOVE this! Sadly for me, I can relate to so much of this! Age is not a number, it is a feeling. And I feel about 80! Thanks for the opportunity to laugh about it.

      This is funny, intelligent, relatable, enjoyable, and very well written. You have absolutely delivered on this one! ... Love Carlin by the way. A brilliantly funny man.

    • mary615 profile image

      Mary Hyatt 4 years ago from Florida

      Oh, yes.....I knew I was getting old when I realized I had more doctor's appointments on my calender than social events!

      Thanks for the laugh and for George Carlin. He was one of the greats.

      Voted UP, etc.

    • phoenix2327 profile image

      Zulma Burgos-Dudgeon 4 years ago from United Kingdom

      Funny hub, Leslie. Love starting my day with a laugh.

      It's true though. My daughter works as a healthcare assistant mainly with the oldies and she can vouch for this. Sadly, I'm at an awkward age. I'm too old to keep pace with the rest of the world but too young for the world to offer assistance.

    • moonfroth profile image

      Clark Cook 4 years ago from Rural BC (Canada) & N of Puerto Vallarta (Mexico)

      Lady, I'm THERE and the only thing that's real fun anymore is my mind. Well, it may annoy hell out of others, but I get a kick out of it. Nonetheless, my favourite bumper sticker is "Growin' Od Ain't for

      Sissies." Great little Hub Leslie. Thanks.

    • Mhatter99 profile image

      Martin Kloess 4 years ago from San Francisco

      I joined the masons at 40 and became a teen again

    • dghbrh profile image

      deergha 4 years ago from ...... a place beyond now and beyond here !!!

      Thank for funny piece here. You are really outshining yourself in this one dear Leslie. Shared across the board and voted up interesting.

    • ananceleste profile image

      Anan Celeste 4 years ago from California

      Age is but a number that if you want can be reversed. Or so mu grandmother says. She celebrates her birthday with a laugh and a joke. She always make us switch the numbers of her cake. This year she turned 86 and refused to blow the candles until my dad switched the numbers of the cake. So for all intends and purposes she is 65. She jokes that she fixes herself because she is waiting for her millionaire. She emphasises that she is the teenager that refuses to die. I believe her , she wakes up singing and goes to sleep singing. When ever she has a beer, she clarifies that is not the last one, because her last beer has not yet been made. I bet is true. Great poem as usual Leslie.

    • marcoujor profile image

      Maria Jordan 4 years ago from Jeffersonville PA

      The way you rhyme is a crime...!! You are a funny honey and I appreciate this poem about me...hee- hee!

      Voted UP and FAB. Love, Maria

    • gaplumber profile image

      gaplumber 4 years ago

      Yep, sound like a box of rice crispies when I get up in the mornings, very funny, thanks.

    • Anna Haven profile image

      Anna Haven 4 years ago from Scotland

      Funny and clever. Voted up!

    • old albion profile image

      Graham Lee 4 years ago from Lancashire. England.

      Hi Leslie. All very funny and very true. Tip top.

      Graham.

    • shiningirisheyes profile image

      Shining Irish Eyes 4 years ago from Upstate, New York

      Leslie - You are the master of humorous yet honest poetry! This poem perfectly exhibits that outstanding sense of humor you provide - and I love every minute of it!

      I have grown accustom to waking up and uttering the words "well - that wasn't there when I went to bed" or "how the hell did that get there?" and "what the hell is THAT?"

      Leslie - I am your number one fan!

    • Cantuhearmescream profile image

      Cat 4 years ago from New York

      Leslie,

      This is tooo funny... This is all just starting to make sense to me!

      Well, I must say you are the sexiest comparison to George Carlin I've ever known!

    • ImKarn23 profile image
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      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Debbie: Hello dear - i'm so sorry to hear that life is not happy for you right now! You have SO much on your plate - i'd like to have a little chat with van....Grrrrrr...

      why do we hurt the ones we love?

      please know i'm here...

    • ImKarn23 profile image
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      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Fyrfytr: LOL...i LOVE when you LOVE it!

      I must tell you that your easy praise and abundant compliments speak highly to your ego!

      Ummm...was that a little too freud for this early in the morning..

      lol...XX(X)

    • ImKarn23 profile image
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      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Wayne...

      @Audrey..

      @Susan...

      Hello hub-buds - so good to see you! Glad you had fun here and - Thank you for 'sharing' Susan - don't think i didn't notice..

      Be well - and be good to each other!

    • ImKarn23 profile image
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      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @X: Ummmmm...you guess?

      And - you don't suffer from ANY of this? Wow...i want YOUR genes..

      lol

      Nice to see you as always X

    • ImKarn23 profile image
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      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Billy: Hey Bill-Bro! Love ya too!

    • schoolgirlforreal profile image

      schoolgirlforreal 4 years ago from USA

      Nothing wrong with getting old, it's fun! George Carlin was a great ending. Thanks for the good laugh!

    • HattieMattieMae profile image

      HattieMattieMae 4 years ago from Limburg, Netherlands

      ha ha...you always have sense of humor...you have a pair of those shoes?

    • tonytemplar profile image

      Tony Gilbert 4 years ago from Galveston, Texas

      ah, well you found a home like ViewsHound................why didnt you tell me?.........and I cannot find ANYTHING I HAVE POSTED YET! help!

    • kashmir56 profile image

      Thomas Silvia 4 years ago from Massachusetts

      Hi my friend this is awesome and so true, thanks i needed a good laugh today !

    • aviannovice profile image

      Deb Hirt 4 years ago from Stillwater, OK

      I should hope it is not quite the end! You have weekly walks on the lake. If'n I have to push you or get you a Hoveround, you're going!

    • Nell Rose profile image

      Nell Rose 4 years ago from England

      Not quite there yet, well, sort of.....! lol! so funny Leslie, and so darn true!

    • CrisSp profile image

      CrisSp 4 years ago from Sky Is The Limit Adventure

      Ahm, no ma'am not yet there! :) Lol! This is so funny! Thanks for the much needed chuckle. You're awesome!

    • ImKarn23 profile image
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      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Vincent: I am so pleased that you are probably changing your gotchies as we speak! LOL..

      i've accomplished something...haha..

      as a matter of fact, Vincent - YES - there are those who have told me i ought to do stand up comedy..

      truth be told - it doesn't fit with my need for privacy...

      i have no need of spotlight...it makes me itch..

      lol

      Thanks for sharing my friend - and THANKS for your amazing help!

    • ImKarn23 profile image
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      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Marlene: Lol..So nice to see you sweet friend! And - very glad you enjoyed your visit!

    • ImKarn23 profile image
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      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Sue: Awwwwww - what a sweet compliment! I changed your day - just a teensy bit!

      i am content!

      Thank you so much for sharing, dear!

    • ImKarn23 profile image
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      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Wetnosedogs: Great to see you! I won't ask - altho, ya know - i'd love to know..lol

    • ImKarn23 profile image
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      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Maria: I am tickled to see you my friend! I've been thinking of you and hoping all is well!

      I had nothing but fun writing this one - it was a very easy 'birth'...LOL..

      be well, Maria!

    • ImKarn23 profile image
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      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Gaplumber: LOL...Yep - me too - 'SNAP, CRAPPLE, PLOP'....LOL

    • ImKarn23 profile image
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      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @AnnaHaven: Thank you!

    • ImKarn23 profile image
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      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Shauna: shove it? Love it!

      Annnnd - not above it! lol

      does it get warmer and fuzzier in here when you visit - or - is it just me?

    • ImKarn23 profile image
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      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Tobusiness: Jo - i LOVE your new picture! Gorgeous! Thanks for taking the time!

      And - thanks for sharing - much appreciated

    • ImKarn23 profile image
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      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Carol7777: PICKLEBALL? ummmm...is that some arizona thing that i've not heard of? EVER! lol..

      You're adorable - do you know that?

      i hope so...

    • ImKarn23 profile image
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      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Deergha: Tears of laughter? Cry, baby cry!

      You're hilarious - 'the Pleistocene era...' lol

      be well, my friend..

    • ImKarn23 profile image
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      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Jacharles: LOL..nice to hub-meet you JAC!

      Feel free to rap away...i'll write words - you write music..

      fair?

      fair..

      and please - come again! lol

    • midget38 profile image

      Michelle Liew 4 years ago from Singapore

      Ah, the joys and pains of growing old. We must keep ourselves healthy for then! Thanks, Leslie.

    • Gypsy Rose Lee profile image

      Gypsy Rose Lee 4 years ago from Riga, Latvia

      Just hilarious Leslie. Ah, life, ah, the pain and strife. C'est la vie. Let's stay young forever and rock and roll. Love ya. Hugs.

    • picadilly profile image

      Priscill Anne Alvik 4 years ago from Schaumburg, IL

      Your humor is over the top funny!!! Love this piece!!! Definitely, I am in a fit of giggles Missy L.!

    • profile image

      dreamseeker2 4 years ago

      LOL! Very cute spin on getting older and what some go through. Had to voted up and awesome! I am happy I stopped by to read it!! : )

    • Natashalh profile image

      Natasha 4 years ago from Hawaii

      Hey now, Hush Puppies are comfortable!

    • ImKarn23 profile image
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      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Jaye: Lol..and i am "Directionally Impaired' (and technology...for sure!)..

      I'm so glad you enjoyed this, my friend - even if it caused a wrinkle or two. On YOU - i'm sure they only add character..lol

      Thanks for taking the time!

    • ImKarn23 profile image
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      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Rosemay50: Thanks Rosemay!

    • ImKarn23 profile image
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      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Ed: That sounds like it could be a wild time, my friend! I'm the furthest thing from a party animal, mind you - considering i don't drink and i'm up like at 6am - just for shits and giggles..LOL..

      Thanks for meandering over!

    • ImKarn23 profile image
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      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Dana..yeah, yeah - age is a number - till your joints lock up!

      LOL..

      I'm so glad that you enjoy my labors, dear Dana - that means that you'll be back!

      Looking forward to it - always!

    • ImKarn23 profile image
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      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Mary: Lol...i SO hear you - more Dr's appts than social events! I wish i'd have thought of that when i was writing it..

    • cianeko profile image

      Cianeko Abueva 4 years ago

      Great poem! I love the sound of my mind while reading the last words in each line :-)

    • Vellur profile image

      Nithya Venkat 4 years ago from Dubai

      We never grow old, only young. Great poem. Voted up.

    • ImKarn23 profile image
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      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Faith: Hello dear - so good to see you! I've heard that same little quote - and i agree - too much reality to truly laugh at..

      sigh..

      LOL..Thanks for taking the time, Faith - and thank you for sharing..

    • ImKarn23 profile image
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      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Bill: You are too kind, my friend - but, please - DON'T STOP! LOL...

      All kidding aside- very happy you enjoyed! You know the feeling is mutual!

    • ImKarn23 profile image
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      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Zulma: Hello my friend - good to see you! I bet your daughter tells you stories that make you cry with laughter - and with compassion!

    • ImKarn23 profile image
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      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Harold: Hello, Moon...Boy do i hear THAT!

      I appreciate you taking the time to visit!

    • ImKarn23 profile image
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      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Deergha: Hello, my friend - thanks for giggling - and sharing! Have a great Thursday!

    • ImKarn23 profile image
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      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Graham: Thank you...

    • ImKarn23 profile image
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      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Anan...OMG..i am laughing out loud! Your granny sounds like an absolute hoot! I wish i knew her - and you're lucky that you do!

      What an impact she'll have on YOUR aging process! Lucky you..

    • ImKarn23 profile image
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      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Rasma: Yes - let's DO! lol..

      Thanks for taking the time, dear!

    • ImKarn23 profile image
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      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Michelle: Really nice to see you, my friend! Enjoy your day!

    • ImKarn23 profile image
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      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @CrisSp: And thank YOU sweetie pie!

    • ImKarn23 profile image
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      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Nell: Good for you - fight it every inch of the way, my friend! It's the only way to go..lol

      So nice to see you Nell!

    • ImKarn23 profile image
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      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Becks: I am so pleased that you enjoy my work - it truly tickles me and encourages me to, ya know - try again!

      Sigh..i hear ya about the morning 'scan' - and all the surprises it holds..

      HAHA

    • ImKarn23 profile image
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      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Cat: Just started? Lucky YOU!

      Give it a year or two - it'll make more sense than you can imagine!

      LOL

    • ImKarn23 profile image
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      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Rosie: Hello, gorgeous! FUN? LOL...Easy for you to say - what are you - 30?

      LOL..

    • ImKarn23 profile image
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      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Hattiemattiemae: LOL...I'll never tellllllll.....

      but - thanks for asking - and visiting, Hattie!

    • tillsontitan profile image

      Mary Craig 4 years ago from New York

      Certainly our new mantra! Unfortunately I've been youthfully challenged for a few years, but refuse to believe it! I have to grow 0ld but I don't have to grow up.

      Voted up, funny, and interesting.

    • MartieCoetser profile image

      Martie Coetser 4 years ago from South Africa

      Lol! Aging is surely not for sissies. But I've decided to fight it until Death stops me.

      The fact of the matter DEFINITELY is: THAT'S HOW LIFE GOES!

      Oh, how I love GEORGE CARLIN!

      And you, too, Imkarn, are too witty for your sexy shirt :)

      BTW, my legs FEELS like that, but thankheavens they don't look like that...

      yet.... :)

    • ImKarn23 profile image
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      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Tony: YO! I DID TELL YOU - waaaaayyyy back when (when you weren't listening, clearly..) LOL..

      Anyway, better late than never - god help the hub!

      LOL..

      Love ya T!

    • ImKarn23 profile image
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      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Kashmir56: My pleasure K!

    • ImKarn23 profile image
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      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Aviannovice: LOL...'HOVERROUND???'...

      maybe tomorrow,dear..

      haha

      i DO appreciate the sentiment, tho..(i think...)

      lol

    • ImKarn23 profile image
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      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @MissyP: Keep giggling Missyprissy! Looks good on ya!

    • ImKarn23 profile image
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      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Dreamseeker2: I'm happy you stopped by to read it as well, my friend!

      Please - come again - the welcome mat's always out!

    • ImKarn23 profile image
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      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Natashalt: LOL..nothing personal against hush puppies - and actually considering subbing in 'sensible shoes'..

      DIDN'T...obviously..

      now - hush! lol

    • ImKarn23 profile image
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      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Vellur: How's life in Dubai today? So surreal, eh - from Canada to Dubai - and back again!

      KOOL!

    • CloudExplorer profile image

      Mike Pugh 4 years ago from New York City

      Leslie your poetic flow is more like poetic glow. Your words wrap around this page as if they were meant to be here, your poems are true personifacation in motion, as you've managed to summon up reality in the mix of laughter and with such stylish grace as a poet.

      Wowsers :) is what I felt as I laughed down the page here, and I love the way you write, it is a breath of fresh air. Your poem here is smoking! 5 Thumbs up and you know the rest.

    • picklesandrufus profile image

      picklesandrufus 4 years ago from Virginia Beach, Va

      Hey, I resemble these remarks:) Vote way up and quite funny!!

    • Cantuhearmescream profile image

      Cat 4 years ago from New York

      Well girl, I can't guess what's happening on the inside, but you're outsides are like the fountain of youth... you pretty lady!

    • poetforlife profile image

      Marie Williams 4 years ago from Dallas, Texas.

      So Funny. I laughed out loud. Nicely put.

    • always exploring profile image

      Ruby Jean Fuller 4 years ago from Southern Illinois

      OMG, Is this what i have to lQQk forward to? LMSO and George Carlin, what can i say? I love him..I have every video he ever made. RIP George. Leslie you crack me up like no other. Still love you my witty friend. More please...

    • ImKarn23 profile image
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      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Cianeko: Thank you! Hoping you enjoyed it to the point where you can no longer resist returning..

      do not resist..

      lol

    • phoenix2327 profile image

      Zulma Burgos-Dudgeon 4 years ago from United Kingdom

      Indeed she does, Leslie, indeed she does. I can't help but admire her clients. I hope I'm as feisty as they are when I reach that age. Think of the fun I could have pissing everyone off knowing there's nothing they can do. I mean, I'm old right? I can't help myself. (giggling evilly) ;)

    • Denise Handlon profile image

      Denise Handlon 4 years ago from North Carolina

      ha ahahahahaaa You're great, Leslie, and so is your humor! Loved this and your choice of video. George Carlin reigns in the everyday happenings of humor. LOL ! Sharing this one! UP / FUNNY

    • ImKarn23 profile image
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      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Mikey: Thank you, my friend! Your compliments mean a LOT to me - as you know!

      Keep laughing - it looks awesome on ya!

      And - thanks for sharing!!

    • ImKarn23 profile image
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      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Cat: You're sooo sweet, but - here's a little secret: it's good from far - but - far from good!

      fair nuff?

      now...ssshhhhhhh.....don't tell!

    • ImKarn23 profile image
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      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Poetforlife: Nice to hub-meet you poet! If you liked this - get used to it - poetry is not my genre - as long as it rhymes - i'm over the moon!

      LOL

    • ImKarn23 profile image
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      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Mary: So good to see you, my friend - as always! Oh - i have many mantras, as i'm sure you do and - this is definitely one of them!!!...

      we don't get OLD - we get OLDER - and then we DIE!

      lol

    • Cantuhearmescream profile image

      Cat 4 years ago from New York

      I will not let you speak such MALARKEY!

      But that is about the cutest thing I've heard, It's gonna be my new thing! :-)

    • ImKarn23 profile image
      Author

      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Martie: LOL..It's fight or die, eh sista?

      too sexy for my shirt? Thanks (peeling it off NOW...hhaha)..

      OMG@your legs

      i am laughing SO hard - thank you!

    • ImKarn23 profile image
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      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Picklesandrufus: LOL...zat so? Well, then - why doncha just 'Exit - stage right!'...

      NOOOO...don't go - i didn't mean it - promise!

      (can ya tell it's friday?)

      Thanks so much for putting up with me!

    • ImKarn23 profile image
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      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Ruby: Doll - if you're still 'looking forward' to it? You're doing GREAT! lol..

      Still love you too - of course!

    • ImKarn23 profile image
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      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Denise: HOLA, Denise - so nice to see your smiling face!

      I agree - George is KING! Thanks for taking the time, having a giggle - AND for sharing!

    • ImKarn23 profile image
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      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Cat: You are very quickly becoming one of my mostest favoriteest peoples! You're adorable AND hilarious!

    • FyrFytr234 profile image

      FyrFytr234 4 years ago

      I do love this one. It's quickly become one of my favorites. LMAO and shared...again.

    • ImKarn23 profile image
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      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @MyFyrfytr: Thank You..

    • Cantuhearmescream profile image

      Cat 4 years ago from New York

      Leslie,

      Aw, you just absolutely made my night! Honestly, I am so glad I found you; you are truly a one of a kind! I love your attitude and you are so talented, though I don't think you give yourself enough credit... we'll have to work on that! ;-) Thank you!

      Cat

    • Vinaya Ghimire profile image

      Vinaya Ghimire 4 years ago from Nepal

      Im,

      world is a cruel place to live, people only admire perfection.

    • ImKarn23 profile image
      Author

      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Cat: I am thrilled that you found me as well, because now - i've found YOU and - i'm keeping you! lol

      Sigh...you touched a nerve with the second half of your comment, dear..

    • ImKarn23 profile image
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      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @VinayaGhimire: Hello, dear friend - SOOOO nice of you to visit! I know you are busy, therefore - i am honored!

    • Cantuhearmescream profile image

      Cat 4 years ago from New York

      Leslie,

      Aw... well that's a good thing, cause I wasn't goin' anywhere anyway! ;-)

      You're the best!

      Cat

    • gaplumber profile image

      gaplumber 4 years ago

      Oh Lord, Cat you and Leslie are friends? We are in big trouble mister.

    • Cantuhearmescream profile image

      Cat 4 years ago from New York

      Plumber, Hehe, yes, though I cannot even compare to this awesomely awesome specimen of a lady, but she has allowed me the pleasure of follwing her around! She's actually quite a charmer, if you haven't figured that out yet, it won't take long!

    • Lisa Luv profile image

      Lisa J Warner 4 years ago from Conneticut, USA

      LOL...I have a really good friend I have to share this with... Excellent Job!

    • ImKarn23 profile image
      Author

      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Plumber: HAHA...you have NO idea...between Cat, Beckie - and ME - you'd best mind your p's and q's sir!

      haha

    • ImKarn23 profile image
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      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Cat: Hmmmm...i see you suffer from the same affliction as I - You don't give yourself enough credit!

      Now - STOP THAT NONSENSE! (how's that for charming...)

      LOL..

    • gaplumber profile image

      gaplumber 4 years ago

      Sounds like we need to meet up for a beer, Hmmm, "Cyber Bar"?, could be a million dollar idea.

    • gaplumber profile image

      gaplumber 4 years ago

      OK who is Beckie?

    • ImKarn23 profile image
      Author

      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Plumber: Shiningirisheyes...

    • gaplumber profile image

      gaplumber 4 years ago

      OoooooHHHhhhhh, just can't beat an education

    • Cantuhearmescream profile image

      Cat 4 years ago from New York

      That's my girl!

    • ImKarn23 profile image
      Author

      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Lisa: Thank you sweetie - i appreciate your sharing it forward...we need to do that for each other more..

      i do it with almost every hub i read..

      talk soon, my friend!

    • ImKarn23 profile image
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      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Plumber: Beer? ewwww...i could probably manage cyber beer - but - no guarantees..

      my motto is - if it looks like pee pee and froths like pee pee and smells like pee pee - well - ya know the rest..

      LOL..

      and - yes - it very well could be a million dollar idea! can i be part owner/topless waitress? HAHAHA..

      clearly - i'm senile..

    • Eiddwen profile image

      Eiddwen 4 years ago from Wales

      As always very very brilliant !!!!

      Have a wonderful day my dear friend and keep these gems coming!!!

      Eddy.

    • Jackie Lynnley profile image

      Jackie Lynnley 4 years ago from The Beautiful South

      Wow you hit it right on the nail head, you did. lol

      As long as we can laugh about it though we will be OK! ^

    • teaches12345 profile image

      Dianna Mendez 4 years ago

      Wow, this really does tell it like it is! Thanks for the humor and for telling the truth in a fun light.

    • ImKarn23 profile image
      Author

      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Eddy: Hello, my friend - i hope you had a beautiful weekend? I think that i actually WON'T be writing on the hub too much any more..

      i'd LOVE if you wanted to follow my blog!

    • JayeWisdom profile image

      Jaye Denman 4 years ago from Deep South, USA

      Leslie, I hope your comment above doesn't mean that you are leaving HubPages. If you have a blog, please provide the URL, as I'd love to continue reading what you have to say.

      Your fan and friend,

      Jaye

    • ImKarn23 profile image
      Author

      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Jaye: I'm afraid that it does, my friend! I've overstayed my welcome and - they're making it very clear! I'd rather go on my own steam - than on theirs, if you know what i mean!

      if you'd like - give me your email address and i'll add it to my blog so that when i post something - you'll be notified (or WARNED..) via email and all you have to do is 'click'!

      That goes for anyone else who'd like to follow me to a place where i can be free to say what i need to say!

      I'll of COURSE be on the hub - a lot - to read my amazing friends work!

      Just cause i'm not here doesn't mean i'm abandoning you! I read you because you're TALENTED writers!

      Luckily - leaving before being kicked off leaves me with this wonderful option!

      I'm afraid i just couldn't give a S*** about how to fold a fitted sheet - or what the color blue is good for!

      and i'm tired of worthwhile messages being censored!

      omg..lol

    • ImKarn23 profile image
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      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Jackie: Lol...sadly, i did, eh? i'm a 'young' OLD and yet - i feel it every single day..

      haha..

      it doesn't help that i've probably broken, sprained, strained - or concussed - every bone in my body!

      oops..

    • ImKarn23 profile image
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      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Teaches: Lol...sadly, eh?

      Always a pleasure when you visit, my friend!

    • midget38 profile image

      Michelle Liew 4 years ago from Singapore

      Age is but a number! Thanks for sharing, and I'm passing this round again, Leslie!

    • ImKarn23 profile image
      Author

      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Michelle: So true my friend - age IS just a number - and i've HIT IT! lol

      now - i have to make fun of it - my way! lol

      hope you giggled..

    • Deborah Brooks profile image

      Deborah Brooks Langford 4 years ago from Brownsville,TX

      Well I had to read again.. lol still so funny but this is hitting too close to home.. my body is desperately trying to be young but nothing is happening except being old..lol

      love you girlfriend

      Sharing

      Debbie

    • ImKarn23 profile image
      Author

      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      Deb...lol..i like this one too - makes me giggle still..

      love you - thanks so much for visiting - and sharing!

    • snakeslane profile image

      snakeslane 4 years ago from Canada

      Ms Karn,

      Erma Bombeck move over!!! Funny haha and kinda sad but true...Good work! Regards, snakeslane

    • carter06 profile image

      Mary 4 years ago from Cronulla NSW

      So Hi again ImK..just thought i'd drop by & see what ur up to..& found this tonic for help with getting older:) yep that is indeed just how life goes!! Funny as Leslie!! Cheers

    • ImKarn23 profile image
      Author

      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Carter06: Hello, dear - and welcome!

      Glad you found some solace from your aches and pains here..haha..

      i hope you come visit me at my new blog - i won't be writing on hubpages any longer..

      you can find me at...http://imkarn23.blogspot.ca/

      or - you can just leave me your email - and i'll take care of it on my end

      thanks for laughing!

    • ImKarn23 profile image
      Author

      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Snakeslane: LOL...You mean ROLL over - not MOVE over - yes?

      haha

      thanks you so much for visiting, commenting - and just generally putting up with me!

    • epigramman profile image

      epigramman 4 years ago

      Well no one does it quite like you my lovely Leslie - and while reading and laughing at this painful truth I felt I was reading something by Dr. Seuss if he were a feminist and the cat in the hat wore lipstick ,lol.

      Your hub presentations and wonderous feats of writing are always so much fun and you've got the best BS detector in the business.

      Thank you for your awesome birthday wishes and yes at 55 now I am feeling some of this pain too.

      lake erie time canada 12:20pm I think we've got summer now

    • Theater girl profile image

      Jennifer 4 years ago from New Jersey

      So very funny and clever! And I envy your ability with phrasing/rhyme. I have seen your name on other comments that I have left elsewhere and have been meaning to visit. So glad I did and I will be back soon!

    • ImKarn23 profile image
      Author

      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      Epi: lol..glad you stopped by for a giggle E! - i enjoyed one that you provided as well!

      I love that you mention Doctor Seuss - i actually describe myself as Doctor Seuss with a Social Hammer...ummm...is that bad? lol..

      Hope your birthday was as 'special' as YOU are..(LOL)

      get it - special..do ya? huh?

      omg

    • ImKarn23 profile image
      Author

      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      @Threatergirl: Wow - i JUST left you fan mail before i knew this comment was here! Thanks for stopping by - sadly - i'm not writing here anymore - just reading!

      Nice to hub-meet you Girl! - your icon reminds me of spirograph! lol..

    • Theater girl profile image

      Jennifer 4 years ago from New Jersey

      You are very welcome! And I appreciate the following! My symbol is Celtic...but I love the Spirograph analogy!

    • Suzie HQ profile image

      Suzanne Ridgeway 3 years ago from Dublin, Ireland

      Oh Leslie,

      This is class girl . . . . LOVE IT!! This is a keeper and getting pinned, shared everywhere & beyond!

      Your talent and sense of humor (toilet humor!!! lol couldn't resist) are totally outrageous and just the tonic we all need daily!

      EXCELLENT write as obvious by the comments received :-)

      Apologies for my tardiness in getting to this party late!

    • ImKarn23 profile image
      Author

      Karen Silverman 3 years ago

      HI Suzie! No apologies needed, my friend! Better late than never! I hope you can find your way over to my new blog!

    • Suzie HQ profile image

      Suzanne Ridgeway 3 years ago from Dublin, Ireland

      Leslie, what is the address of your blog, couldn't find it on your profile?

      I'm game!

    • mary615 profile image

      Mary Hyatt 3 years ago from Florida

      Well, I can certainly relate to this one! I love your first photo, reminds me of my poor ole departed Aunt. I enjoyed hearing George Carlin. He was so great (RIP).

    • ImKarn23 profile image
      Author

      Karen Silverman 3 years ago

      @Mary: LOL..i love Georgie - he lives on forever! Thanks for stopping by Mary!

      ps - sorry about your aunt's ankles..lol

    • HarrietteS profile image

      Harriette Schwartz 3 years ago from Fresno

      Too funny...so well written!

    • manatita44 profile image

      manatita44 3 years ago from london

      Yes. I like it, and no, it's not the end. Lots of sweet simplicity here, and I hope you see how much you are serving here. Old age is a new page. Keep trucking. Loving thoughts.

    • vocalcoach profile image

      Audrey Hunt 3 years ago from Nashville Tn.

      Leslie - I just got arthritis in my pointer finger from scrolling all the way to the bottom comment :) You have a legion of fans who love you as well as your stunning humor. Me included.

      Respect old people. They graduated school without Google or Wikipedia

      ~ Love you

      Audrey

    • ImKarn23 profile image
      Author

      Karen Silverman 3 years ago

      Vocalcoach: LOL...i'm SO sorry about the arthritis, my friend - i have it everywhere EXCEPT my pointer...haha..

      Hey, girlfriend - i'm old enough to DEMAND respect for MY old age...

      i am 53 (at least for a few more days..lol)

      I hope you know that i'm not writing on the hub anymore? i've started a blog which is doing better than i EVER did here..

      the hub and i weren't a great fit - other than the A-mazing hubbers!

      i'd love if you visited, dear - it's only a click away!

      imkarn23.blogspot.ca

    • rajan jolly profile image

      Rajan Singh Jolly 3 years ago from From Mumbai, presently in Jalandhar,INDIA.

      That's how life goes! You are so very right! Enjoyed this poem on the changes aging brings. I love the bitter pill with sweet coating title.

      Voted up and awesome. Shared.

    • ImKarn23 profile image
      Author

      Karen Silverman 3 years ago

      Hi Rajan. Thanks so much for visiting and sharing! I'm hoping that you find my new blog cause i ain't writing on the hub no mo', no mo'..

      lol

      hugs, my friend

    • savvydating profile image

      savvydating 3 years ago

      A week or so ago, a 30 something man asked me if my daughter worked at ________. And I was like, Whaaat? (in my mind) To this day, I see myself as that daughter. I am that luscious, beautiful woman. That person you speak of is not my daughter - she is Me!

      Once in a while, life gives me a reality check. But I don't care. I see myself as amazing and beautiful, even though I am 55. I am totally unrealistic in this regard - and I pray that I always will be. ;)

      Enjoyed the video. George Carlin is an incredible talent.

      Thanks you for this lovely poem. I enjoyed it so very much.

    • savvydating profile image

      savvydating 3 years ago

      P.S. I don't have a daughter.

    • ImKarn23 profile image
      Author

      Karen Silverman 3 years ago

      Well, hello savvydating - love your comment, thank you! and btw - you ARE amazing and beautiful! It's all in your attitutde and you oooze it my friend!

      i don't write on the hub anymore. i started a blog that's doing better than the hub ever did..

      if you'd like a one-click way to get there, just let me know..

      i don't like to push..lol

      (i knew you didn't have a daughter - no need to mention..lol)

    • savvydating profile image

      savvydating 3 years ago

      Yes indeed. Please let me know how I can click to your hub!

    • AudreyHowitt profile image

      Audrey Howitt 3 years ago from California

      This is still highlarious!!

    • ImKarn23 profile image
      Author

      Karen Silverman 3 years ago

      LOL..Thanks Audrey..At some point, it will get new life when i post it to my blog..(new life, get it?)

      LOL

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