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Space Over Matter

Updated on July 30, 2013

A bizarre beginning turns into a happy story.

June 17, 2013. Biloxi, MS

The interviewer gathered some papers and then looked straight at me. She was a typical office secretary. Black sexy bifocals, black blazer and pencil-thin skirt. Black heels complimented her feet and legs. From the expression on her face, it looked like I wouldn't get the job.

"This job is only for crossdressers. Are you a crossdresser?" she asked me.

"Yes," I answered, without hesitation. That was an odd question. And in Mississippi of all places.

"Will you come up to work drunk and impaired in some manner?"

"Yes," I simply answered. "Is that so I can be taken advantage of in some form?"

"Yes. You will need your inhibitions lowered in order for the men to enjoy your company. They are looking for a good time. You may need to flirt with them"

"Will I have to have sex with them?" I asked back. All in the same moment, I became astonished with the questions that were being asked.

"You may."

"Okay. So..."

"You're hired!"

I pumped my fists mildly. "Yes!"

"Just come tomorrow morning around ten-thirty and we'll get you set up."

"Thank you!" I said.

After a handshake, smile and nod, I took my leave of her. I headed down to the nearest gas station because I needed some cigarettes. As I was walking in, a light hispanic man with a moustache and dark brown hair yells out, "Hey, who won Super Bowl XIV?"

"Pittsburgh!" I yelled back. And that was that. I had absolutely no idea who he was.

I stepped in through the door and headed to the counter. There were four people in front of me. Two were hispanic men, one of which had a case of Bud Light. The other wore a backwards beige baseball cap and had a bag of chips and a diet coke. The other two, one being a white male, kind of rugged looking, holding a six-pack of Natural Light. The person in front of me, a older black man was holding a 24-oz. can of Bud Ice.

So as the line continues to move, more people get in behind me. There's an elderly black woman behind me and two blonde girls behind her.

I was next in line when all of sudden, police officers are running in a frenzy to one end of the building, followed by four other men in black overcoats and earwigs.

Another guy in a black overcoat runs into the store and begins to look around. Then he taps the earwig.

"All clear inside." He then leaves. After he leaves everyone in the store began to murmur amongst themselves.

The obvious questions arise. "What's going on?" and "What was that all about?" Everyone looks at each other in astonishment at what transpired.

Everyone else had already stepped out of the store to see what was going on. The officers were nowhere in sight. The guys in the black overcoats were also gone.

The blondes reacted slightly more than anyone in the store. "Did you see what I saw?" one of them asked. Everyone else nodded in agreement.

The cashier, who was Arabian, tall, lanky and wore glasses, and who was just as curious as we were, quickly focused his attention and took care of the next customer. I approached the counter.

"Yes?"

"Malboro Menthol Smooth 100s."

The cashier turned to grab a pack and at the same time. As he did that, a strange thing happened. There was a whooshing sound from outside. However, it was not the wind.

Something invisible flew by the store. I turned my head to the window and saw nothing.

"There's something weird going on out there," he noted in a thick Arabian accent.

I turned back to the cashier and paid for my cigarettes and headed out.

As I was walking to my car, someone called out to me. "Hey you!" The voice was raspy. I looked in the general direction of the voice, which was where the hispanic man was standing.

There stood a creature, resembling the Grinch, with fluffs of white hair on the sides of his head and orange-colored skin. He came up to me.

However, as he was coming up to me, my crazy uncle comes forth from the opposite direction, with a beer can, giving me his regards. I became afraid. Two random people wanting my attention at the same time at the same place.

The "Grinch" looking fellow looked at him, then looked at me. He patiently waited for the meeting to unfold. The "Grinch" looked like something was going to explode.

As my uncle and I exchanged greetings, the "Grinch" stood there observing the interaction. After my uncle left, I turned my attention to the "Grinch."

"Your name is Mimi," he said.

Taken aback, I responded, "I'm who?"

"You are Mimi. You live as male on the outside but your are a female on the inside."

I became shocked. "And how would you know something like that?"

"My species is not from this planet. We have a natural ability to read minds. Much like you do."

"Your species? What are you? And I can't read minds."

"You may think you cannot, however you will learn. You have potential. As you are already empathic."

"What? Who are you?"

The alien closed its eyes and held up a finger. "One second, please." After a moment, he pointed the finger behind me. I turned around and saw something truely remarkable. A number of police officers came out of nowhere, rushing over to my crazy uncle, jamming him up in order to put him down and arrest him.

I stood wide-eyed at the incident. In the words of Jack Buck, the late announcer, "I can't believe what I just saw!" It was like watching Kirk Gibson homer off of Dennis Eckersley in the bottom of the ninth during the 1988 World Series. Keeping in mind that Kirk Gibson is a Gemini and Dennis Eckersley is a Libra, my three Libras in my astrology chart and my Aquarius moon, I began to feel the air clear inside of me.

After the officers made the arrest, they took him past me, charging him with something that almost never gets charged - domestic abuse of the emotional form within the extended family. Hearing them charge the uncle with emotional abuse pretty much left a tear in my eye. I had no idea how to react. This was pure vindication at last!

After the officers put the uncle in the back seat, I looked to the alien with eyes of wonder. This was all his doing.

"Oh my God," I said in a whisper. "I can't believe you had just done that!"

"You're welcome!"

I couldn't help it. I reached out and hugged the alien. He hugged back. "How can I ever repay you?"

The alien looked to the squad cars that were leaving the area. "He will be charged with domestic abuse in the emotional form within the extended family in the 1st degree. Because he did not repent, he will serve the maximum of three years in a maximum security prison, and undergo psychiatric treatment for another three years. After which he will be released, however to register as a high-alert offender."

With tears in my eyes, I leaned in and kissed the alien on his wrinkled forehead.

"Live your life," he said, simply. "You will do great things in the future. That is the only way you can repay me. Enjoy now." And with that, the alien disappeared into thin air.

A government official came out of the store and approached me. "How are you doing?" he asked.

I looked to him with tears in my eyes. "I believe I'm going to be just great."

The agent reached into his coat jacket and pulled out a slip of paper. I received it and opened it. It was a check. The number of zeros made my heart leap.

"For your troubles, ma'am." For a nine life path, the money is simply a bonus. We enter into things just for the fun of it. "We insist."

The agent left and disappeared around the store corner, leaving me to go over all that just happened. After a while, I got into my car and cried myself to sleep.

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