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Summer Daybreak - Haiku in Traditional Style

Updated on November 3, 2012
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Modern Haiku poetry focuses mainly on the 5-7-5 structure of the poem. I find writing a modern haiku tons of fun. However, there is something strikingly beautiful about the traditional form. There are nuances and guidelines that could take me a lifetime to master, if I am able to do it at all. For this effort I have focused on what seem to be the three constants pointed out in any instructional material on haiku.

See if you can find three traditional elements of Japanese haiku: 1) 5-7-5 syllable structure, 2) a word or phrase referring to the season, 3) a contrast or juxtaposition


Summer Daybreak


warm night dark and still

purple-pink to golden bands

laughing children play



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    • DanaTeresa profile image
      Author

      Dana Strang 5 years ago from Ohio

      Sunshine625 - LOL! Thanks Linda! I am shameless! And trying to lift Audra out of her spazzy funk. :)

    • Sunshine625 profile image

      Linda Bilyeu 5 years ago from Orlando, FL

      Stopping by for some hublove due to pity! You are too funny:)

      Awesome haiku!!!!

    • DanaTeresa profile image
      Author

      Dana Strang 6 years ago from Ohio

      Jamie - Thanks for stopping by. Glad you liked it :)

    • jhamann profile image

      Jamie Lee Hamann 6 years ago from Reno NV

      What a great haiku, thank you for sharing. Jamie

    • DanaTeresa profile image
      Author

      Dana Strang 6 years ago from Ohio

      tobusiness - thank you. and thanks for the vote up! :)

    • tobusiness profile image

      Jo Alexis-Hagues 6 years ago from Lincolnshire, U.K

      Beautiful haiku, the little poem that says so much. Voted up

    • DanaTeresa profile image
      Author

      Dana Strang 6 years ago from Ohio

      Hypenhbird - Thank you. So glad you enjoyed it. I enjoyed writing it.

    • Hyphenbird profile image

      Brenda Barnes 6 years ago from America-Broken But Still Beautiful

      It is lovely and very well written. I enjoyed this Haiku very much!

    • DanaTeresa profile image
      Author

      Dana Strang 6 years ago from Ohio

      Bill - I am glad and excited to see that I am making noticeable progress! I am loving this and really do hope to make something out of it. You have been a great supprt along the way. Thank you!.....This is also the NERD in me emerging. I love to study. Something inside me felt that if I was going to try an artform it was almost sacrilege not to study it in its pure form.

      Audrey - Thank you. That means a lot coming from you.

      Faith Reaper - Thanks. This is also the teacher in me coming through. I find something so special in the traditional form and I felt the need to share it.

    • Faith Reaper profile image

      Faith Reaper 6 years ago from southern USA

      Lovely haiku! Thanks for explaining the difference between the modern and the traditional Haiku. In His Love, Faith Reaper

    • AudreyHowitt profile image

      Audrey Howitt 6 years ago from California

      What a beautiful haiku!

    • billybuc profile image

      Bill Holland 6 years ago from Olympia, WA

      It's good to see you growing in your writing skills my friend. I do believe I see a writer emerging and it's a wonderful sight to see. :)

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