I Won't Give Up On Us: A Moment With Bill Reflection

“You must not lose faith in humanity. Humanity is an ocean; if a few drops of the ocean are dirty, the ocean does not become dirty.”

Mahatma Gandhi

There is no need for great detail. At one time I was a non-productive and yes, destructive, drunk. Today I am a recovering and yes, some would say, productive member of society.

Two things saved me: a willingness to live and the supportive shoulder of some friends and loved ones who would not give up on me. They were determined to love me until I could love myself.

And they were successful!

We got a lot at stake, we never break we only bend, pass the guns and butter, boys, and set out those sentries for guard duty tonight, because the wolves are howling at the door and damned if they don’t look a lot like you and me and Ned and Pete and Sally and…..

I won’t walk away, dude, no matter how much you piss me off, and freedom of speech is a pain in the ass when it means listening to your bullshit about gun control or increased gun ownership, and Catholics vs Jews vs Pentecostals vs Baptists, and who is right and who is wrong and look, up in the sky, it’s a bird, it’s a plane…..no, it’s just the sheik spouting his venom in our direction once again, and who can be trusted when friends look like enemies and enemies look like friends?

Send the kids to school, go shopping at the Mall and hope to God today is not your day to witness the glory of automatic weapons at the Food Court; pass the mustard and the steal-jacketed rounds, please, and when the meal is over step over the homeless, toss a quarter in the hat and feel better about yourselves, and then go home, if you survived the shopping trip, and read the latest venomous diatribes on social media about the damn Democrats, the idiotic Republicans and oh say can you see, the red, white and blue patriotism of the Tea Guzzlers as they upset the apple cart and show us the way to true freedom.

The sermon on Sunday says love thy neighbor but by Monday it’s cutthroat business as always, and why share when more is better and most is best, and reality is just so much X Factor and a Boo Boo named Honey, but there are so many boo boos that we really can’t see the forest for the trees or the trees for the forest.

They die of hunger under the Golden Arches, and they are buried in the Potter’s Field, no names to represent their passing, no mourners, only one stacked on top of another on an island named Hart, not Heart, not even close to the heart necessary to right these wrongs….but…..

I won’t give up on us!

Hell, we’ve always been crazy. History is a fine lesson in man’s inhumanity towards man. We have raised cruelty to art form level. We did it one thousand years ago and we do it with gusto today.

Hell, we’ve always hated in this world. We have always rummaged through the fears lurking on the backstage of our mind and found a reason to hate. Hate does not require intelligence; nor does fear. Hate does not require wisdom; nor does fear. Hate does not require reason or logic or the scientific method; nor does fear.

All that hate requires is a sickness of the soul.

I won’t give up on us!

Prejudice has always been and always will be. Wherever a group of people congregates, there will always be that fringe group that are legends in their own miniscule minds. They are always superior, always greater than, always the chosen ones whose sole purpose in life is to spread hatred and vile, demeaning words of slander. They have a unique ability to find the soft spot in the underbelly of society and viciously stab it and stab it and stab it again until every last drop of blood has bled out.

All that prejudice requires is a sickness of the soul.

I won’t give up on us!

Why is it that hatred comes so easily but love is a monumental task?

Why is it that those who are in need are looked down upon while those who find nurture in greed are idolized?

Why is it that we, as a society, are so willing to accept mediocrity when our purpose on earth is greatness?

I won’t give up on us!

Because mine eyes have seen the glory of the coming of brotherhood.

At our best….when we are at the top of our game and playing with an effortless style that reminds one of a bird hovering in the thermals at 500 feet….when we are living lives of compassion and empathy and yes, love….those are the times when we catch a glimpse….a fleeting shadow on our periphery…of what we can be. And if we can be those things; if we can be agents of a higher calling and purpose, then I won’t give up on us!

I have seen the results of an angry mob after they beat a gay man and nearly killed him. As he lay in his hospital bed clinging to life, I have seen hundreds of strangers camp outside of that hospital in a quiet prayer vigil.

No, I won’t give up on us!

I have seen a community ravaged by a tornado, broken and bloody and searching for any sign of hope, and I have seen loving citizens travel for thousands of miles with canned foods and first aid supplies in the trunks of their cars, willing to do anything to help their fellow men and women.

No, I won’t give up on us!

I have seen a business executive become the victim of a hit and run, shattered bones and life blood spilling into the gutter, and his head held in the lap of a homeless man who could not turn his back on a fellow human being.

No, I won’t give up on us!

For sixty-five years I have witnessed the worst of mankind. I have been sickened and disgusted and ashamed by my fellow men, and I have vowed to run away from it all and become self-sufficient in a universe of my own creation, safe from the deadly sins that spotlight our moral weaknesses.

But for sixty-five years I have remained because my eyes see what the television cameras and news reporters fail to see. My eyes see hope where others see hopelessness. My eyes see compassion where others see egocentric apathy. My eyes see love and understanding and a determined desire to make this world a better place, one person at a time, where others see greed and complacency.

No, I won’t give up on us!

I refuse to walk away I’ll always stay, and we can laugh in the sunshine and deal with the storm clouds when they blow in, and blow in they surely will do, but one person teaming with another and another, and from small acorns grow mighty trees, and if you promise not to walk away as well then maybe, just maybe…..we can make a difference.

No, I won’t give up on us!

2013 William D. Holland (aka billybuc)

“Helping writers to spread their wings and fly.”