Your thoughts on Victim Shaming?

1. 81

   Misbah786posted 3 years ago

   Victim shaming, I believe, is a very common practice around the globe. It's all around us, from our daily lives to news channels. What makes me wonder is why it is so common. Is it some sort of self-defense mechanism that many of us use to protect and guard ourselves? If yes, then how it can help any of us? 
   Your thoughts?

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   1. 85

      Kyler J Falkposted 3 years agoin reply to this

      I take the route that Dave Chapelle boldly doubles down on, in most situations I am what you would call a, "victim blamer."
      
      This is only true to such a degree that I find victims to be as responsible for ending up in the situations they do, as perpetrators are for victimizing the individual(s). In most cases the victimization was avoidable if the victim had taken responsibility for their own safety, wellbeing, and situation. However, this does not always hold true, it isn't always 50/50.
      
      Sometimes, such as in the case of minors who don't know any better, victimization is not the victims responsibility in any way. The responsibility belongs 50% to the perpetrator, and an often ignored notion is that 50% of the blame falls upon the caretakers of the minor if they are not also the perpetrator(s). Nonetheless, shaming is an often misused term to cancel out important notions that should and would otherwise be discussed.
      
      Victim shaming is often brought up to hide ugly truths the victim would rather not have aired. It is a concept that exists solely when a victim's scenario is made public, and it is an issue of publicizing more than it is an issue of the victim shaming itself. If things were kept objective, and victims could widely accept fault for the actions that regularly lead to their repeated, "victimization," we would see much less victim shaming.
      
      Alas, this issue tends to make its way back to gender, race, etc., and it is dangerous for me to even weigh in on it as a mostly-straight white male. Victim shaming is a widely abused, but critically important topic.

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      1. 81

         Misbah786posted 3 years agoin reply to this

         Yes, it is a crucial issue that must be addressed.
         
         In my opinion, people who have been victims of any form of violence typically describe emotions of dread, stigma, and self-blame as a result of their experiences, and the prevalence of victim blaming can make it difficult for survivors to get the support and care they need. Isn't it?
         
         In my opinion, victim blaming is the practice of pointing out a person's alleged flaws or differences that may have made them a target. In general, people have a tendency to look for the source of violence as something the person who was harmed did or did not do to prevent it. Right? But as you said this rule does not always hold true, it isn't always 50/50.
         
         When criminals are allowed to roam free, and the victims are blamed more than the perpetrators. The peace get shattered.
         
         According to my knowledge, In many cases, victims are forced to endure even more in many circumstances. Is it reasonable?
         
         Many people are afraid of being accused even if they are the victims, therefore they don't raise their voices. Is this a sign of a society that is healthy and peaceful?

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         1. 85

            Kyler J Falkposted 3 years agoin reply to this

            People tend to confuse criticism for blame/shame, and thus we get the abuse of the phrases themselves. Victims need to be criticized by the proper authority figures, and everyone involved needs to stop publicizing the issues where the public court turns it into shaming. Let's think about a real-life example where criticism is often called shaming:
            
            There was a girl here in California who carried around a mattress after alleging she was raped upon it. Her alleged rapist was acquitted of any wrongdoing, and she felt this was absolutely unfair. For weeks she carried the mattress in protest everywhere she went, and the media called everyone who criticized her a victim shamer.
            
            Now, what the media was not revealing was that the man was actually wrongfully accused of rape, and he had his reputation ruined by this female. Despite her facing repercussions for this behavior, the damage had been done because "victim shaming" is so widely abused to cover proper criticism of "victims". She wasn't a victim at all, it turns out that she was bitter he broke up with her, and to get back at him she knew she could accuse him of rape and turn it into a spectacle.
            
            Skepticism of victims in the public eye should be mandatory, and "victim blaming/shaming" as the media labels it more often hides harsh truths for the sake of social movements. They do this at the expense of real victims. This is where my problem lies with promoting anti-victim shaming without touching on the fact most things labelled as such are not actually inappropriate.
            
            This is an opinion based on the privileged standards of America, not countries where women are still treated like second-class citizens. Alas, in America it is even worse on men who are shamed for even trying to stand up to their perpetrators in any other way besides utterly destroying them before the victimization can even occur. Those men rightfully get told to man up and take responsibility for their actions that led to them being victimized, and their perpetrators are punished upon being found guilty, all is set in balance when it is rightful to do so.
            
            "Victim shaming," is a phrase that began the movement for #TeachBoysNotToRape, and its etymology is even deeper rooted in anti-white misandry here in America. Advocate for keeping these issues out of the vitriolic public court, and push for authorities to handle these cases with sensitivity and discretion so as not to cause the unnecessary uproar, trauma, and lasting damages that you're worried about. If it makes it to the public court, well, "victim shaming" is just a natural byproduct due to individualism.

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            1. 81

               Misbah786posted 3 years agoin reply to this

               When it comes to victim shaming, I don't believe it's a matter of gender, race, etc...
               
               The victim could be either a man or a woman.
               We recently had a case in Pakistan where the man was a Pakistani American who was involved in Satanic activities.
               
               At his own residence, he detached the girl's head from her body. Because of his American nationality, a few police officers and media reporters supported him. Fair enough?
               
               The government and court took strict action against the man . Now besides the fact that he is an American citizen. He is  behind the bars so to say that there are places where women are still treated as second class citizens is a wrong judgement. But yes, in many cases, victims are charged more than criminals. Isn't it upsetting?
               
               Some people supported that man just because of his power that's where the problem starts.

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               1. 85

                  Kyler J Falkposted 3 years agoin reply to this

                  Where the problem starts depends on the perception of what the problem is, but objectively the problem has a root, and victim shaming is but a symptom.
                  
                  Victim shaming is wrong, not scrutinizing a victim's allegations is ignorant, releasing things to the public court is disgustingly irresponsible, and forming opinions based on incomplete information is the root of it all. This is why advocating for anti-victim shaming is simply not the answer, because it muddles the root cause and is easily abused.
                  
                  Advocate for relevant authorities to receive proper training in sensitivity courses, and in lieu of training have specialists on standby. Stand against the media who abuses the phrase, "victim shaming," solely for their ratings, and destroys more lives for profit than trying to solve the problem could ever cause.
                  
                  Victim shaming is a problem phrase in and of itself, a symptom of a greater problem, and you want to cut a single head off of the Hydra. Attack the problem at its roots, the lack of training, and the performative publicizing of a victim's story to the detriment of society as a whole.

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                  1. 81

                     Misbah786posted 3 years agoin reply to this

                     Your points are well-made and logical.
                     
                     It is critical to speak out against and raise awareness about the media's abuse of the term "victim shaming" for ratings purposes, because it ruins many lives for no reason.

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