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Love to Murder - Women Getting out of Domestic Abuse

Updated on January 16, 2020
clivewilliams profile image

Happily Married and Giving great advice to married and single people.

Domestic Physical Abuse
Domestic Physical Abuse

Love Is a Good Thing

Love is always a wonderful thing. Millions of people experience love and have committed their lives to lifelong faithful partners. But not all of us experience the sweet flow of honey that love brings. Some of us will be heartbroken and will experience the bitter side of love when it moves from love to hate and possible murder.

There are many couples worldwide who have had to go through the terrible experience of relationships that have moved from love physical abuse. Even though domestic abuse happens on both sides of the fence, meaning both men and women suffer from domestic abuse. It is the women who have had the worst and most experiences as it relates to domestic abuse especially the physical aspects of it.

Many women have been beaten and battered by the same hands that have hugged, cared for and protected them. They have suffered lifelong trauma which some will simply never get over. This domestic physical abuse is normally vetted out by their male counterparts for various reasons. We will look at some of the reasons later on in this article. But what people should always realize is that all relationships are not carved in stone and it is no different than having an investment in a bank. All relationships are a kind of Investment

Relationship Is An Investment

There is no doubt that many people give there all in relationships and have invested years in the union. Some have invested money, good support and everything which should be an automatic attribute of having a healthy relationship. They make plans to be with the person they invest in until death do them part. And I mean literally till death do them part. But people who decide to share their existence in a very personal way with someone should understand that they have begun an investment. But just like you would take a million dollars and invest in stocks and bonds and for some reason you lost money in that investment, you can lose in a relationship investment. You just weigh your pros and cons and realize that the investment is not a one hundred percent secure return and you may end up losing on that investment. All investments involves some amount of risk no matter how small or how large. Point and case: Prepare to win and prepare to loose

Signs Physical Abuse Is About To Start

Many people who suffer from domestic abuse fail to see certain signs which are pathways of what really is to come. The fact is that some people refuse to see the signs because they just cannot fathom that their nice angel has become or is becoming Lucifer’s right hand man or woman. So what are the signs that domestic abuse is about to start?

1.There is the verbal assault beginning.

The verbal assault can be from belittling the other person to constant cursing. The spouse may begin to have a problem with and everything you do. The verbal assaults will begin from mild to severe in a short time.

2. Constant Anger.

Is another sign that domestic physical abuse is in the pipeline. You cannot live with a person who will be constantly angry at you for no reason or for every simple thing you do. Don’t wait until he changes green. Get out while he is still human.

3. He raises his Hand to hit you.

What other greater sign is there. A woman who has a spouse who raises his hand to hit her and then withdraws and tries to cuddle his way back into your goodness should be avoided like poison. If he raises his hand at you and decided that he isn’t going to hit you or pleads to you and tell you it was a mistake, wasn’t thinking straight or he was angry. Chances are that he will raise that hand again and this time it will come down on you.

Domestic abuse and Murder
Domestic abuse and Murder

Why Some Men Physically Abuse Their Women

When the domestic physical abuse starts, it will be like a nightmare which you simply cannot wake from. Women cannot believe that their knight in shining armor has become this demonic being they no longer know. There is absolutely no justification for men physically abusing women to the point where they actually take the woman’s life. But here are the reasons why men harm their spouses.

1. Women Are Their Property

There are some men who still believe that women are their property and not their partner and as such they treat them like they own them. They will say and do just about anything they believe they have the right to say or do without any remorse. This kind of thinking is primitive and clearly shows that some men are still neanderthals and have not evolved to intelligent beings.

2. The Woman Wants To End the Relationship

Men can’t handle rejection, especially if they believe that they have invested their time and money into a relationship and the woman decided that she wants out as there are better prospects ahead, fallen out of love, or discovers that the man is a no good two timer. The man may not want to end the relationship and will may possible launch a physical reprisal. This reprisal can lead to the woman’s life being loss.

3. They Have The Upper Hand In The Relationship

There are millions of women worldwide especially in countries that they deemed ‘third world’, rely heavily on the pocket of men to live. The men work and basically pay all the bills while the women simply stays home and do home making. The woman sees the man as her means of survival and the man sees the woman as a child depending on him to eat, shelter and just about everything else. Many men abuse this upper hand in the relationship and will net out physical abuse because they know the woman has nowhere else to go and depends on them to survive.

4. They Are Weak and Probably Scared of Other Men

There are some men who basically have what I call women strength. They feel empowered knowing they can beat on a small female but simply do not have the balls to stand up and defend her against a real man.

5. Cant Handle Their Problems

There are those men with tons of problems on their minds and will resort to heavy drinking to try and drown the problems. When they reach home to their spouses they then begin pseudo conflicts and then exercise their anger on beating the woman.

Women Physical abuse and Murder
Women Physical abuse and Murder

Advise For Abused Women

1. Seek Counselling

I am not here to tell anyone to simply pack your bags and run out flying. Because there have been cases where men have changed and are living happy lives with their family. Before the relationship reaches to a point where it becomes unbearable emotionally and physically. You should seek cancelling. Sit down and speak with someone and have the spouse there for counselling after. Sometimes all it takes if for us human beings to speak out and listen too and great changes can effect.

2. Call the Police

If you believe that your life is threatened. Don’t be afraid to have the police involved. Remember, not every case of domestic affairs may lead to your spouse being arrested. But get the police involved as soon as the fear is realized that you are about to be or in danger.

3. Leave

Never be afraid to walk away. Don’t think about all the worldly possessions that you may be leaving behind. Run away as far as you can. If you have children, take them and run. Runaway with your life. You can attain all you believed you lost in that relationship. The greatest thing is to know that you are free from all the abuse.

Women and Domestic Murder

There are many women who have lived to tell the tale of their abusive relationships. But there are many who have died by the hands of their husbands or boyfriends. Women have been shot, stabbed, poisoned and just about any other modes of taken someone else’s life which can be used. Some have tried to exit the relationship as they had foreseen what would have taken place but simply never made it through the door. While some have left the relationship and yet still hunted and killed by their sick spouse who believe that they have the right to take someone else’s life.

Women, if you believe that you have an ex that may cause you harm, don’t be afraid to walk with your own protection. You have the right to life just like those who seek to take it.

© 2020 Clive Williams

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    • clivewilliams profile imageAUTHOR

      Clive Williams 

      4 weeks ago from Jamaica

      Points well taken dashingscorpio

    • dashingscorpio profile image

      dashingscorpio 

      4 weeks ago from Chicago

      "Many people who suffer from domestic abuse fail to see certain signs which are pathways of what really is to come." - True!

      If you're with someone who punches holes in walls, throws things, or curses out beat up (other people) when they're angry you have to know it's only a matter of time before YOU upset them.

      The mistake a lot of women make is believing they're "exempt" from the kind of treatment they witness their man dishing out on others.

      Believe it or not some women are attracted to thugs, gangsters, "bad boys", or "Alpha males". They will tell "nice guys" they need a "real man" and in some instances these women will (initiate) violence, get within an of their face yelling or block his exit.

      One of the dumbest things a person can do is slap a bear.

      More often than not their retaliation is going to twice as hard.

      Anyone who wants love and peace in their relationships will leave a relationship where there is verbal abuse or a threat of violence.

      It makes no sense to wait around for the first slap, punch, or kick.

    • clivewilliams profile imageAUTHOR

      Clive Williams 

      4 weeks ago from Jamaica

      Eric, I agree with you 1000%. Many times people see domestic abuse and turn a blind eye simply because they don't want to get involved.

    • clivewilliams profile imageAUTHOR

      Clive Williams 

      4 weeks ago from Jamaica

      Yes Emge, change must start from law makers and then a cultural education on the rights of women.

    • clivewilliams profile imageAUTHOR

      Clive Williams 

      4 weeks ago from Jamaica

      Flourish. Sometimes a little family justice is needed.

    • Ericdierker profile image

      Eric Dierker 

      4 weeks ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      This just plain disgusts me. No not your hub but the fact that we need to even think about it. When we know it or see it we must step up and be damn with the consequences.

    • emge profile image

      MG Singh 

      4 weeks ago from Singapore

      This is a topical subject as domestic abuse is a problem that can't be wished away. It's perhaps a little better in the west but in the East, it is an endemic problem as historically and culturally a woman is considered inferior. Who will change that? This leads to violence against the woman.

    • FlourishAnyway profile image

      FlourishAnyway 

      4 weeks ago from USA

      I know more than several women and a man who have been abused by partners. Generations ago the police dismissed it. My grandfather and uncles imparted family justice on an in-law who was beating my aunt and he quietly went his own way.

    • clivewilliams profile imageAUTHOR

      Clive Williams 

      4 weeks ago from Jamaica

      Thank you Pam

    • clivewilliams profile imageAUTHOR

      Clive Williams 

      4 weeks ago from Jamaica

      Thank you Ruby

    • always exploring profile image

      Ruby Jean Richert 

      4 weeks ago from Southern Illinois

      This is a great article Clive. I know that many women and a few men live with abusive partners, why I don't know? Your article is topnotch on ways to handle abusive situations.

    • Pamela99 profile image

      Pamela Oglesby 

      4 weeks ago from Sunny Florida

      This article addresses domestic abuse very well. Women must get the stregth to get out of these toxic relationships. I know it is hard sometimes but domestic abuse is being addressed more effectively by the police now as compared to a few years ago. I think it is good that you discussed this important topic.

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