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Reasons to never date a married man: Why you should avoid going out with a guy who is married

Updated on February 4, 2014

There are many obvious reasons why you should never date a married man. Apart from being tagged as a home-wrecker, you will never be able to avoid the guilt of robbing another woman of her love, family and home. If you are thinking about getting into a relationship with a married guy, this post is just the rude wakeup call that you need. Don't let yourself be the woman with whom a husband cheats on his wife.

No matter how real it seems, you will be his mistress.
No matter how real it seems, you will be his mistress. | Source

1) You are just the other woman, mistress or a fling

No matter how hard you try to convince yourself otherwise, you will always be the other woman when you are dating a guy who is still married. You are nothing more than his mistress.

He may come to meet you after work and he may take you out on those weekend getaways but at the end of the day he will still go back home to his wife and kids. He is merely using you for a no-strings attached fling.

2) You will damage your reputation among your family and friends

It will be difficult for your friends and family to see you in the same way after they find out that you are dating a married man. For your family, it will be hard to believe that the girl who was once such a bubbly and innocent teenager has now become a home-wrecker.

Apart from the fact that your best friends won't like your new boyfriend, some of them might even start distrusting you. After all, if you can date a married man without any regard for his wife, your bestie might start feeling uncomfortable leaving her boyfriend around you.

3) You will have the home-wrecker tag on your own conscience

Apart from the embarrassing fact that everyone in your friend circle will look at you with those judgmental eyes, your own conscience will forever have to carry the weight of the home-wrecker tag.

There is no reason that can justify your actions which are responsible for wrecking a home, marriage and the lives of his children.

A man who betrays his wife, children and family - how much more self-centered can anyone be?
A man who betrays his wife, children and family - how much more self-centered can anyone be?

4) You are dating a selfish and self-centered man

A guy may have led you to believe that he is dating you because of certain problems in his marriage but never forget one thing – behind that charming facade is a man who is selfish and highly self-centered.

He is having a casual relationship with you without any regard for his wife and children. There is can't be anything more selfish than that guy's urge to seek a sexual relationship at the expense of lying to his wife, betraying her trust, being a bad father and making a mockery of his marriage.

5) He is probably lying to you all the time

When you are dating a married man, you are dating a guy who is an expert liar. Just think about the fact that he has to lie his heart out every time he goes back home after meeting you.

From lies about being held back in meetings to lies about going out with his buddies, this guy is highly experienced at being a ruthless liar. He has little or no conscience and he has perfected the art of lying.

Now if that man can lie to the woman who he calls his wife and the innocent children he calls son and daughter, you are someone who hardly matters in his already eroded conscience. So whether it is his tall claim about getting a divorce soon or how his wife is unable to make him feel like a man – be rest assured that he is lying to you.

6) Think about the children whose lives you will destroy

It is unfortunate that innocent children have to face the consequences of the irresponsible actions of a father who cheats. Their childhoods will be ripped apart when their parents eventually divorce.

Regardless of the outcome of your relationship, nothing can change the fact that you will partly be responsible for shattering the happiness of children who had nothing to do with their dad's cheating ways.

He could be seeing other women behind your back.
He could be seeing other women behind your back.

7) He could be having an affair with other women

No matter how special you see your relationship to be, there are no guarantees that you are the only mistress your married guy has. There is no reason for you to conveniently believe that you are his only mistress.

For all you know he might have a couple of more girlfriends outside his marriage. You might be just one of many other women who he lies to and gets into bed with.

8) If he is cheating on her, he can cheat on you

You have fallen into his trap of false promises if you have already started believing that he will finalize his divorce soon. And even if he isn't living with his wife any more, you must remember that the guy who can cheat on his family can easily cheat on you.

It is likely that you are setting yourself up for an epic heartbreak if you think that you will have a committed relationship with a man who doesn't even know the meaning of commitment.

9) You risk a confrontation with his wife

Dating a married man comes with the inherent risk of having to deal with a confrontation with his wife. If things really get out of hand, you might even find yourself at the receiving end of a nasty rant coming straight from the heart of the woman whose home you are responsible for eroding.

You will be scarred for life if such a confrontation actually plays out. The haunting memories of seeing the pain and anger in another woman's eyes will make it difficult for you to pick yourself up and start dating again after the guy leaves you for another mistress.

Don't assume that your relationship will have a picture perfect ending. It might in fact turn into one of the biggest regrets of your life.
Don't assume that your relationship will have a picture perfect ending. It might in fact turn into one of the biggest regrets of your life.

10) Your relationship will probably end with heartbreak

One of the most obvious reasons why you should avoid dating a married man is the likeliness that your relationship will end in heartbreak. Some of these situations could unfurl:

  • He dumps you because he wants to get back together with his wife
  • He separates from his wife but refuses to commit to you
  • You find out that he is cheating on you with another girl
  • He wants to go out with you but doesn't want to divorce his wife

Be prepared to face disappointment, heartbreak and regret on top of the haunting guilt of being a home-wrecker. Don't be so naïve to assume a picture perfect situation where he will seamlessly divorce his wife, move out from his house and shoulder the responsibility of starting a new life with you while already being burdened with alimony payments.

11) Think about karma: How would you feel if your husband dated another woman

'What goes around, comes around', 'what you give is what you get' and 'you reap what you sow' are different sayings that point to one basic thing – you will face the brunt of your actions sooner or later.

The fact that you chose to date a guy despite knowing that he is married means that you knew what you were signing up for. You knew that you would be the woman who destroys a family and robs another woman of her marriage. There may not be immediate repercussions but your actions will come to haunt you in one way or another.

12) Dating a married man is just wrong

Before you even start worrying about the intricacies of a relationship with a married man, you should remember that it is wrong on many levels. It is a moral crime and ethically a nasty thing to do.

Dating a guy who is married has never been cool and never will be. It is just not worth facing the guilt of doing something that is wrong on many levels.


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