ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel
  • »
  • Gender and Relationships»
  • Marriage»
  • Happy Marriages

Small talk in relationship- Brings both closer!

Updated on November 14, 2013

While everyone wants to have a peaceful and happy married life, it is the lucky few who are able to enjoy an excellent relationship with her\his spouse.

Why is it so?

Why can’t everyone have a good marriage?

It is because you have many fears about your life and you do not feel like making your marriage work.

  • Are you worried about the future of your family?
  • Do you feel stressed about your tight work schedule?
  • Do you find it impossible to spend time with your family?
  • Does your conversation with your spouse invariably end in bitter arguments?

Most of you have to make a strenuous struggle to keep the love between you and your spouse alive and vibrant.

Why has marriage which should actually give you happiness and emotional security become a battle ground of fights and arguments?

Who is the culprit for such a situation in your life which robs you of the essence of marriage?

  • The culprit is you and your spouse.

What is the major fault you commit to make your married life lose its sheen very soon?

The fact is you live through your marriage in a routine way and so you are bored by your married life.

Why is your marriage boring?

  • You do the same thing over and over again.
  • You do not small talk
  • You are too concentrated on your problems
  • You do not spend light moments together
  • You hide your emotions from your spouse

It is very true you face many problems in your married life and find it impossible to deal with it. When one issue is solved there is another one waiting in the corner to demoralize you. The sad thing is that instead of relieving your tension by sharing your emotions with your spouse, you deviate from her\him to spend lonely moments of frustrated anger.

Are you aloof with your friends or colleagues? Whenever I go any office, l always observe the interaction between colleagues. The friendly repartee and the way they smile at each other, pulling legs and the pleasant atmosphere that exists there makes me wonder whether they are the same person when at home also.

You are fun in your workplace whereas you are morose in your home. Why this vast difference in your behavior at home and at work? The answer is very simple. You are pressurized by the problems you face in your family and relieve your pressure by enjoying amiable friendship with your colleagues.

When you talk with your spouse the conversation invariably turns towards the financial, emotional and other relationship issues you face in your marriage. You both do not agree to the views of the other and the result is arguments, squabbles, bitterness and resentment.

This is the reason why you see couples doing their own thing when at home and talk only when necessary. Lighter and fun moments are rare and scarce. Why do you only take issues as a topic for conversation with your spouse? It is very true you cannot avoid discussing family problems with your spouse, but that need not be the only topic for your interaction.

Do you know small talk can liven up your married life as nothing else?

What exactly is small talk?

  • It is an innocuous conversation, very light and fun.
  • It can be about movies, fashion trends, neighbors or film stars.
  • The conversation is tension free and it lengthens and extends the time you spend together.

You should interact with your spouse about mild topics which is not a serious family issue, but of general interest. Does conversation about movies or film stars evoke argument? It does not! It is sheer fun reviewing the pros and cons of a movie and how stars acted in it. The conversation is fun and cheerful. Just a small example of small talk!

Interaction about the naughty actions of your pet is always a joy to talk about and you invariably laugh together. There are many light topics which make you feel relaxed. You should laugh together as it makes you come closer to each other. Conversation about your family problems should just be a part of your interaction and should not occupy monopoly in it. But small talk should be the main conservation you have with your spouse as it is then you enjoy the true happiness of a good marriage.

© 2013 mathira


    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    • mathira profile image

      mathira 4 years ago from chennai

      billy, I feel good for you. That is how it should be.

    • billybuc profile image

      Bill Holland 4 years ago from Olympia, WA

      Very important information here, Mathira. So many couples get into a routine of only talking about problems...Bev and I are best friends and we gab like little kids on the playground about silly matters. :)

    • mathira profile image

      mathira 4 years ago from chennai

      Yes, shabushraj many of us do not know how small talk can enliven married life. Thank you for the visit.

    • shabushaj profile image

      shabushaj 4 years ago from india

      This will look like silly matter but it really matters. Small talks can create great happiness to the minds. How nice it would be if every couple remember this ..good writing..thanks for sharing..

    • mathira profile image

      mathira 4 years ago from chennai

      Tiredness and tension takes away the energy to interact. But couples should understand that it is small talk that eventually brings them together.

    • mathira profile image

      mathira 4 years ago from chennai

      denise, lot of us slide into routine life as we have so much of worries about family life and in the end forget that worrying does not marriages work, but the friendliness you share with your spouse that does the magic. Thank you denise for the visit.

    • mathira profile image

      mathira 4 years ago from chennai

      thumbi, small talk livens up marriages and if only couples try to do it, they will find great deal of positive changes in their life.

    • mathira profile image

      mathira 4 years ago from chennai

      Lighter moments are fun moments of marriage, MsDora. Have a great day.

    • mathira profile image

      mathira 4 years ago from chennai

      lisa, marriage survive only when you keep trying to make it work. Very hard, but should be done. Thank you for the visit.

    • Brian Prickril profile image

      Brian Prickril 4 years ago from Savannah, GA

      Very good practical advise on an issue that so easily spirals out of control in many homes across the globe. It is so difficult for people to come home from work and relax and talk about something other than work problems and unpleasant things. It carries a negative energy with it. Your very simple advise could be very helpful.

    • denise.w.anderson profile image

      Denise W Anderson 4 years ago from Bismarck, North Dakota

      This good advice. My husband I have been married for thirty-five years, but we rarely talk about trivia unless other family members are present. Somehow, we have lost that part of our relationship. I will make a concerted effort to re-kindle it!

    • thumbi7 profile image

      JR Krishna 4 years ago from India

      I totally agree with you. If you always discuss problems, you get bored with each other overtime and look for fun outside.

      There is lot of importance in small talk and jokes between husband and wife.

      Thanks for shariing

    • MsDora profile image

      Dora Weithers 4 years ago from The Caribbean

      "Light moments together." There's a thought. Married people can find lots of communication areas to reflect on. Thank for dealing with this topic.

    • lisa maria jones profile image

      lisa maria 4 years ago from greater manchester england.

      So true marthira but some times you can talk till the cows come home,and then you no you have tried and carnt make it together.And no talking will do.


    This website uses cookies

    As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

    For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at: ""

    Show Details
    HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
    LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
    Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
    AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
    Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
    CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the or domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
    Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
    Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
    Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
    Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
    ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)