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Small talk in relationship- Brings both closer!

Updated on November 14, 2013

While everyone wants to have a peaceful and happy married life, it is the lucky few who are able to enjoy an excellent relationship with her\his spouse.

Why is it so?

Why can’t everyone have a good marriage?

It is because you have many fears about your life and you do not feel like making your marriage work.

  • Are you worried about the future of your family?
  • Do you feel stressed about your tight work schedule?
  • Do you find it impossible to spend time with your family?
  • Does your conversation with your spouse invariably end in bitter arguments?

Most of you have to make a strenuous struggle to keep the love between you and your spouse alive and vibrant.

Why has marriage which should actually give you happiness and emotional security become a battle ground of fights and arguments?

Who is the culprit for such a situation in your life which robs you of the essence of marriage?

  • The culprit is you and your spouse.

What is the major fault you commit to make your married life lose its sheen very soon?

The fact is you live through your marriage in a routine way and so you are bored by your married life.

Why is your marriage boring?

  • You do the same thing over and over again.
  • You do not small talk
  • You are too concentrated on your problems
  • You do not spend light moments together
  • You hide your emotions from your spouse

It is very true you face many problems in your married life and find it impossible to deal with it. When one issue is solved there is another one waiting in the corner to demoralize you. The sad thing is that instead of relieving your tension by sharing your emotions with your spouse, you deviate from her\him to spend lonely moments of frustrated anger.

Are you aloof with your friends or colleagues? Whenever I go any office, l always observe the interaction between colleagues. The friendly repartee and the way they smile at each other, pulling legs and the pleasant atmosphere that exists there makes me wonder whether they are the same person when at home also.

You are fun in your workplace whereas you are morose in your home. Why this vast difference in your behavior at home and at work? The answer is very simple. You are pressurized by the problems you face in your family and relieve your pressure by enjoying amiable friendship with your colleagues.

When you talk with your spouse the conversation invariably turns towards the financial, emotional and other relationship issues you face in your marriage. You both do not agree to the views of the other and the result is arguments, squabbles, bitterness and resentment.

This is the reason why you see couples doing their own thing when at home and talk only when necessary. Lighter and fun moments are rare and scarce. Why do you only take issues as a topic for conversation with your spouse? It is very true you cannot avoid discussing family problems with your spouse, but that need not be the only topic for your interaction.

Do you know small talk can liven up your married life as nothing else?

What exactly is small talk?

  • It is an innocuous conversation, very light and fun.
  • It can be about movies, fashion trends, neighbors or film stars.
  • The conversation is tension free and it lengthens and extends the time you spend together.

You should interact with your spouse about mild topics which is not a serious family issue, but of general interest. Does conversation about movies or film stars evoke argument? It does not! It is sheer fun reviewing the pros and cons of a movie and how stars acted in it. The conversation is fun and cheerful. Just a small example of small talk!

Interaction about the naughty actions of your pet is always a joy to talk about and you invariably laugh together. There are many light topics which make you feel relaxed. You should laugh together as it makes you come closer to each other. Conversation about your family problems should just be a part of your interaction and should not occupy monopoly in it. But small talk should be the main conservation you have with your spouse as it is then you enjoy the true happiness of a good marriage.

© 2013 mathira


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    • mathira profile image

      mathira 4 years ago from chennai

      billy, I feel good for you. That is how it should be.

    • billybuc profile image

      Bill Holland 4 years ago from Olympia, WA

      Very important information here, Mathira. So many couples get into a routine of only talking about problems...Bev and I are best friends and we gab like little kids on the playground about silly matters. :)

    • mathira profile image

      mathira 4 years ago from chennai

      Yes, shabushraj many of us do not know how small talk can enliven married life. Thank you for the visit.

    • shabushaj profile image

      shabushaj 4 years ago from india

      This will look like silly matter but it really matters. Small talks can create great happiness to the minds. How nice it would be if every couple remember this ..good writing..thanks for sharing..

    • mathira profile image

      mathira 4 years ago from chennai

      Tiredness and tension takes away the energy to interact. But couples should understand that it is small talk that eventually brings them together.

    • mathira profile image

      mathira 4 years ago from chennai

      denise, lot of us slide into routine life as we have so much of worries about family life and in the end forget that worrying does not marriages work, but the friendliness you share with your spouse that does the magic. Thank you denise for the visit.

    • mathira profile image

      mathira 4 years ago from chennai

      thumbi, small talk livens up marriages and if only couples try to do it, they will find great deal of positive changes in their life.

    • mathira profile image

      mathira 4 years ago from chennai

      Lighter moments are fun moments of marriage, MsDora. Have a great day.

    • mathira profile image

      mathira 4 years ago from chennai

      lisa, marriage survive only when you keep trying to make it work. Very hard, but should be done. Thank you for the visit.

    • Brian Prickril profile image

      Brian Prickril 4 years ago from Savannah, GA

      Very good practical advise on an issue that so easily spirals out of control in many homes across the globe. It is so difficult for people to come home from work and relax and talk about something other than work problems and unpleasant things. It carries a negative energy with it. Your very simple advise could be very helpful.

    • denise.w.anderson profile image

      Denise W Anderson 4 years ago from Bismarck, North Dakota

      This good advice. My husband I have been married for thirty-five years, but we rarely talk about trivia unless other family members are present. Somehow, we have lost that part of our relationship. I will make a concerted effort to re-kindle it!

    • thumbi7 profile image

      JR Krishna 4 years ago from India

      I totally agree with you. If you always discuss problems, you get bored with each other overtime and look for fun outside.

      There is lot of importance in small talk and jokes between husband and wife.

      Thanks for shariing

    • MsDora profile image

      Dora Weithers 4 years ago from The Caribbean

      "Light moments together." There's a thought. Married people can find lots of communication areas to reflect on. Thank for dealing with this topic.

    • lisa maria jones profile image

      lisa maria 4 years ago from greater manchester england.

      So true marthira but some times you can talk till the cows come home,and then you no you have tried and carnt make it together.And no talking will do.