- Gender and Relationships
Wedding Tips: Planning A No-Glitch Ceremony!
10 Tips to Help Plan & Achive A Great Wedding!
Unfortunately even setting an enormously high budget for the wedding does not mean that the wedding ceremonies will run totally smooth, that they will be executed flawlessly. Not even spending mega bucks can ensure total success without a glitch.
THE key to coming as close as possible to a perfect wedding is to have everything planned, planned down to the last little detail. The more time there is for planning the better, as that will leave more options for everything. This will leave room to either rethink or re-negotiate. Change venues or come up with different plans altogether, if the prior once are not possible, whatever the need may be.
Tip #1: Plan things together!
Two of the most important items
which should not be overlooked when planning a wedding is to have both the bride and grooms tastes and ideas
represented and to be able to stay within the set budget. In most peoples lives their wedding is the largest "party" that they ever plan and getting the wedding off the ground without any major glitches is the first big endeavor the bridal couple will face together. So it's important that both the bride and groom talk and talk some more about what they are expecting the marriage ceremonies to be like.
As mentioned already before the bridal couple needs to make every effort to discuss all there is to do with the wedding plans. For example if the Groom doesn’t show the same enthusiasm towards all the planning the bride can get uptight and then she will feel at odds and get stressed even before the match has been set in stone.
Tip #2: Stay within the set Budget!
cannot be mentioned often enough and stressed enough of how important it is to stay within the set
amount of the wedding budget. Many a fight can be avoided when both partners
understand this importance. For example if both partners are working on the
planning of the menu and if the costs happen to be higher then at first
anticipated then both will understand why changes need to be implemented or
they can 'both together' come up with alternate ideas. However if its really
important to either one then they 'both' can decide that even with the higher costs it is what
they both want and then work on cropping the costs down in a different area. It will work much easier if These plan altering decisions are always better if they are made to be a 'together' choice.
If the budget is in jeopardy a re-evaluation of all that is being planned needs to be looked at.
However it is also important that both, the bride and groom make a point of
committing to one item each that they must absolutely have to have. This one item doesn’t
have to be huge. With other words both bride and groom need to have one special
part of their dream wedding that neither should have to skimp on. That particular
item that really matters to them, that they have always dreamt of having in their
wedding. The rest, the not so vital parts, can be re-organized or totally
dropped. As long as those two special important features are present the rest can be brought down to the bare bones.
Tip#3: A marriage, a melding of two Families!
The following points are written for the family members on both the bride and grooms side. Most want you to think and accept that the family and relatives of your future partner do not really matter, but that is not the case. This is one of the hardest things to remember, no matter what, the marriage between two people is not only the joining of two people but also the melding of two entire families.
Marriage is a tough proposition. From the get go there are tough odds against a marriage succeeding now-a-days. Parents, relatives and friends of the young couple are encouraged to put their own feelings aside no-matter what. All brides and grooms will need all the outside support they can get. Obviously if the couple comes from different backgrounds, religions and cultures things are going to change.
Each family member will have to build up an acceptance for the sake of the new couple. Unfortunately a lot of fights can be started by intolerance. For the sake of inner peace in the family unit each family member should learn and try to find out as much of the others customs as possible. Try to celebrate each side's uniqueness. It can be a lot of fun experimenting with each others customs and foods. The most important aspect to remember is always what each extended family member has in common and that is – the love for the bride or groom and eventually a grandchild or two.
Let’s face it, the bride or groom have chosen their 'hopefully' life partners, the person they want to spend their lives with…if acceptance is not given by family and friends the couple will have to make a totally unfair choice. For their future to work out they would have to choose to give up on their past heritage and unfortunately that could start some resentment towards the partners and his or her family.
The mixing of two cultures naturally within reason can result in some really fabulous new custom. For example, obviously smashing all the dishes a-la-Zorba-the-Greek ways could get quite expensive especially with the collectors place settings received as wedding gifts so if it's an important custom for either the couple might want to only start the once a year flinging contest with some old dishes collected from family or friends or with stuff that they have bought at the thrift shop just with this in mind. There is always a compromise possible and celebrate each others differences with an open mind.
Tip#4: Mother-in-Laws...your loved ones Mom!
This is for the Brides and Grooms, always remember that the future mother-in-law is the loved ones Mom and she can’t be all bad as she bore your loved one…in that capacity she does deserve if not love then definitely respect, and at the very least a kind of tolerance.
Try not to put
your future partner into the position of having to defend her/his parent. In
most cases the Moms are wanting the best for their off-springs and it will take
time for them to learn to love you as well. In most cases they will quit looking for any false step soon enough once they realize that their baby is happy and content.
As mentioned before the
wedding planning should be something that the bridal couple tackles together. Considering
that this might possibly the biggest ‘party’ you will ever plan in your life
and this being the first major thing you are doing together as a unit it should
be presented with a united front. That united front is the most important picture one can set for family and friends to see.
Tip#5: Keep the wedding in your court!
One of the hardest points to follow up on is to keep the wedding arrangements in your court. Moms at times, need to have a tactful jolt to remind them that this is YOUR wedding that’s being planned and you as the bride and groom have certain ideas and wishes that you want to have included. Now it really is a smart idea to give in on some things that you don't want but one of the mothers does. Choose your battles. If you back- off on something minor, some small detail, it will keep the mom’s happy and out of your hair. However if it's something that either of you absolutely have your own heart set on, push for it even if you have to cry to get it. (This usually works)
One thing however to keep in mind though... remember that there is nothing that guarantees more success in your future life together then if you have the support of your Moms.
Tip#6: Wedding nerves...Normal!
This tip should not be a surprise, both of you will get the wedding day nerves. It’s normal, it’s a matter of fact so you might as well accept it as normal. The bride and the groom get the heebie-jeebies just before the wedding. Wedding day nerves are simply your body’s way of preparing for something special.
These nerves present themselves with your heart racing, slightly light headedness, shaky hands and sweaty palms. Similarly as the once you get when you’re doing a major presentation or are to make a public speech. The trick is to recognize that these feelings are really just your nerves acting up. Try to relax, which ever way works for you. Take your mind off by having a bubble bath, reading a magazine or just sit in front of the TV and watch a couple of hours of mindless programs such as stand-up comedy that will lighten up the mood etc…
Tip#7: Make notes!
Invest in a “workbook” or dated planner and plan, plan, plan for every last detail and keep it with you so that as things get done or changes need to be discussed you will remember. Check off each item once its been taken care of… at the same time make new notes reminding you when each item needs to be confirmed etc. Do not rely just on your memory as this could back-fire. Each of you might think the other has taken care of things and at the end you will be scrambling and upset.
Also get everything written down in detailed contracts from all your vendors – the photographer, the caterers, the cake decorator, the DJ or the band, the florists etc. Insist on having all the details in the contracts. Be suspicious of vendors that do not want to comply. Success can be easier assured if all the i’s are dotted and all the t’s are crossed and for heaven sakes make sure you read all the FINE PRINT.
Everything, absolutely everything should be in writing. Also remember that there will be additional last minute costs, make a list of all the ones that could arise and set aside the funds for them. Such as tips and delivery fees, sales taxes, overtime costs for the caterers etc.
Tip#8: Stick to a set timetable!
For THE day itself map out a timetable of everything you need to do, and stick to it because a lack of planning will only guarantee chaos. If there is a dinner reception planned it is important to get the guests to their place settings as soon as possible. This is in consideration to the caterers who are in charge of keeping and serving the meals hot. Appeal firmly to the wedding party and relatives who are to be included in the wedding photos to assemble immediately at the assigned photo-shoot location so as not to waste time.
All your other guests are waiting and ready to celebrate with you so have all the shots you would like preplanned in your contract with the photographer.
Tip#9: Emergency Kit!
Prepare an emergency kit and give it to a designated family member or friend who will be attending the church and the reception celebration. The kit should contain an emergency pair of pantyhose (if you're wearing them), white chalk for touching up smudges on white shirts, blouses, and dresses, a permanent marker in the color of his and hers shoes for possible scuff marks that could show up on the photographs, safety pins in an assortment of sizes, a spool of white and dark thread with hand sewing needles, a small pair of scissors, deodorant, a small package of Kleenex and very importantly a small vial of Tylenol.
Tip#10: Read about, plan and plan some more!
There are many, many books on the market that have been written about Wedding Planning and they’re all filled with innumerable helpful tips. On-line is another endless source of tips and advice to make your special day as fabulous as you can. Read all you can and take the hints that fit in the best with your wedding and plan on having an amazing wedding and a great future together.
pictures coutesy www. sxc.hu
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