I ve been married for 17 yrs, and have not gotten along with my mother inlaw, a

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   mother of twinsposted 14 years ago

   I ve been married for 17 yrs, and  have not gotten along with my mother inlaw, and she moved in...
   
   my  husbands ex girlfriend in to her house, my husband who goes over for dinner with my kids says I should even think about it, but it hurts, Am I wrong to feel this way? should I say something???

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   dmcfarlinposted 14 years ago

   I think your feelings are 100% justified.  I would let your husband know that it makes you uncomforatable that he goes over there without you (even though you don't want to go).  Don't be accusatory or make him think you don't trust him, just use all the wonderful "I feel" statements to tell him what it puts you through.  Maybe he would be willing to meet her out somewhere for dinner instead of going to her home, or maybe you can make dinner at your place, invite her over (and leave so you don't have to deal with her)!

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   MO-MAMMAposted 14 years ago

   I completly understand your feelings,when I first married my husband my mother-in-law kept pictures of him and his x-wife all over the house. I tried on different occasions to drop hints to her about it, but she never seemed to "pay attention". Finally, my husband confronted her and told her to either get rid of the pics or he would not be coming to see her anymore..it worked!! It is after-all your husbands mom and he really does need to talk to her about the situation. If he truly cares about your feelings he should have no problem doing that for you, but he needs to be serious with her and ready to drop her for a while if needed until she learns to respect his wife.

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   AMBASSADOR BUTLERposted 14 years ago

   Enjoy your time alone when your husband goes over there for dinner with your kids. Do something that you enjoy or just pamper yourself with the peace and quiet that you have during this time. As far as any issues that you may have with your mother inlaw, stay away until you can come to peace with it in your own heart and mind. You are not living with her so there is no longer a reason for you to get upset about it. Your husband ex girlfriend is a non issue and you need not be concerned about it if that is also a reason for you feeling the way that you do and do not say something unless you can say it without attacking or accusations. This is your answer and please use wisdom in this situation for all that is involved. Thank you. Go in peace.

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