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Should we go ahead and have a big wedding and make a smaller down payment on a new house?
If you want an honest opinion, then no - save the money for a down payment. I understand how important a wedding can be - but more important is the marriage. When I married, I couldn't afford a wedding and we got married in front of a judge. I never regretted it - we've been married 41 years.
The wedding ceremony will end and the party will end in a few hours and yes, you will have wonderful memories - but your investment in property will increase right away and you will have a wonderful home to make your marriage and family special.
I totally agree with duffsmom. I am so glad that my husband and I had a small wedding (also in front of a judge) and a little reception for just our close friends. Our marriage is wonderful, and a wedding with a massive price tag wouldn't have made it any better. Plus, planning a wedding is ridiculously stressful, who needs more stress?
No. Don't put more into planning your wedding than planning your marriage. Your down payment on your house is where you will spend the first years of your life together. The wedding is the party that celebrates your union, but it only lasts one day and you get beautiful memories and pictures.
The first question to ask yourselves is do you really want a big wedding. If the answer is no you might then need to ask a different question, such as should we have a honeymoon and make a smaller down payment on a new house.
Assuming the you do both want a big wedding, if the smaller down payment means you can't comfortably afford the new house you want, my answer would be use the money to buy the house.
However if you can still afford the house you want but need a bigger loan that is still easily affordable I'd go for the big wedding and smaller down payment.
Definitely not! You can have a decent size wedding without it being expensive. You can find a small chapel and invite just close friends and family. For a reception, you could have a pot-luck type thing. The point is to just celebrate. I'd spend the money on going on a decent honeymoon and on a down payment. That's my two cents.
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