How do You Get Over a Relationship That Ended With no Closure?
I ask this for a friend who is struggling to get over a long relationship. There was no breakup - just an abrupt stop in communication. This was a long-distance relationship and she cannot travel to meet him up and clear things - the distances involved are huge!! Its been a year since the guy stopped having any interaction with her - e-mail, chat or over the phone. He just doesn't respond! As you can imagine, this can be a difficult situation to overcome and she hasn't yet gotten over it - wanting to know the why's. What would you advise she do to get over this and move on with her life?
Been there, done that.
Please tell your friend that life must go on...what else is there and what else can be done?
I think she needs to come to the realization that it's over and the ball is not in her court. She should be courageous, gracious, and wise enough to understand that not everything in this universe is going to be spelled out for her. It wasn't for me.
Sometimes life takes a huge dump on your front porch and doesn't have the decency to tell you why. She needs to come to terms with it, accept it, clean up the mess, cleanse herself, learn from it, and then move upward and onward.
Unfortunately this is how many long-distance relationships end. People tend to just "fade away". However your friend must keep in mind regardless of how a breakup comes about the end result is the same. The other person has decided for whatever reason that their life would be better off without her in it. The "reason" really doesn't matter because whatever it is that caused him to back off (could be the same reason why another guy would fall madly in love with her).
Oftentimes closure is akin to asking the other person to slap or kick us in the head as they walk out the door. There is nothing he or she can say that will make you feel better about having your heart broken. Knowing "why" doesn't change her reality. Letting go will do that. No doubt over the course of a year she let opportunities go by where she might have met or dated men who actually would appreciate her. However you can't get to second base if you keep one foot on first base. The following are a couple of hubs I wrote awhile back. One is about getting over breakups and the other is about closure.
I wish your friend the best of luck! Life does get better.
http://dashingscorpio.hubpages.com/hub/ … in-General
http://dashingscorpio.hubpages.com/hub/ … andclosure
The best I can suggest is for the offended party to write a letter to the offending party.... then fold it up and put it in a desk drawer. Pull it out a couple of days later... read it.. .then burn it......
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