How do you deal with the conflict if you are not an avid gamer but your signific

1. 67

   StaceytheWandererposted 11 years ago

   How do you deal with the conflict if you are not an avid gamer but your significant other is?
   
   My fiancé is the biggest gamer I've ever seen. We've had to set up boundaries about when and how much because he doesn't even realize how much time it takes up. I barely play my wii.

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2. 87

   rdlang05posted 11 years ago

   I am an avid gamer and my fiance is not.  She realizes and accepts that its a relatively important part of my life, and an essential means by which I relax and de-de-stress. 
   
   You can read any of my relationship hubs... but really what we do is try to communicate our needs clearly and make sure we accomodate each other.  I make sure she comes before video games, but I also let her know when I need some time away from her just to chill and play CoD with the guys.
   
   It's possible that your fiance is addicting or playing way too much though... can he go a few days without playing if needed.  It goes both ways... he needs to realize he needs to set them aside sometimes and do things that are more important in life... but it's also good for you to give him time needed to do something that he really enjoys.

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3. 60

   Danweposted 11 years ago

   Hi Staceyt. Try to take a look at my latest hub about human needs psychology and look at it from that point of view.  I am a gamer myself, though I don't play now as much as I used to Basically gaming is a way of meeting a few of these needs just liek that *clap*. What I didn't write was, that when certain activity makes you meet multiple of these needs (3 or more) it becomes an addiction.
      Gaming can possibly help you satisfy all 6! Ask your fiance what it gives him. Fun (variety) , i bet it gives him certainty as well, maybe significance (trying to be the best , competition between players...) and so on... you need to see what needs he is meeting by gaming.
     The next step would be to find a different way to satisfy these needs. That doesn't mean he must cut gaming as whole, but for example I have a different activities that I enjoy more, and focus on them first before gaming.
   I hope to hear the answer soon

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