Are you annoyed by your girlfriend's past?

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   eusaphzaeposted 7 years ago

   Are you annoyed by your girlfriend's past?
   
   Well! some people take it seriously and some not. My question is, how to get rid of her past? and why it bothers, even she ended up with you?

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2. 0

   AaronHubb89posted 7 years ago

   I'm married now, so I don't know how much value my comment will hold, but I will answer anyways. All I can say is that my wife has done things in the past before she knew me that irritate me, but before we judge, we as men, need to realize that our own past may or may not be as clean as we think. If you are unable to mesh and conform to the woman you claim to love then you don't love her. All relationships are about becoming one and that means that each of you will have to overcome the other's past transgressions and even some current and future ones as well. There's no such thing as a perfect relationship. You can't get rid of her past, you can only create one for her by starting new, better memories. I hope this helps. God Bless.

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      eusaphzaeposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      Hi Aaron, thank you very much for the detailed answer.  People, who are married, can understand this question well, as you did. Sometime things are beyond your control, but with the help of partner, situations could be move to betterment.

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3. 43

   padmendraposted 7 years ago

   Once you have tied a knot of lasting relationship , there is perhaps no reason to recollect your girlfriend's (now your life partner) past which may be of course  little annoying to you,. Digging the old mud will sooner or later break the chain of relationship. Thus the wise step is to keep the past of your partner away from your thinking forever. Looking back means sorrows will emerge one by one. So move on as it the only way to live your life to the fullest.

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      eusaphzaeposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      Hi Padmendra, I agree with you...we have to focus on present and think about future to make it better.
      
      Thank you very much for the answer.

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4. 71

   oknoposted 7 years ago

   Most of us in one way or the other has done something; sincerely we are not happy about and we have not kill ourselves, why other? I believe that now, and future matters not the past, though we can learn from the past that we'll not make the same mistake.

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      eusaphzaeposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      Hi Okno, You are absolutely right, we learn from our mistakes. We should look forward for promising future, leave all the sorrows behind.

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   dashingscorpioposted 7 years ago

   Every "saint" has a past and every "sinner" has a future.
   You can't get rid of (your own past) let alone someone else's past! Reinhold Niebuhr once wrote the following in a poem.
   "God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, The courage to change the things I can, And the wisdom to know the difference."
   Maturity is the key. If one wants to be with a person they have to accept the fact that their mate wasn't born yesterday.
   Very often what happens is people are "jealous" of their mate's past on some level. They are angry that they were not "the first" to enjoy the "benefits" of being with their mate. What they fail to realize is it is our past which leads us to make the choices we do today. Maybe if they had NOT done what they did or experienced what they did then they would not recognize how special (you) are or appreciate you as much.
   People who dwell on their mate's past are (happy people) looking for something to be unhappy about! Stop looking for perfection in an imperfect world.

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      eusaphzaeposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      Hi Scorpio, Thank you for your detailed answer. This poem really has the power to change one's mind.

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