I need some advise please

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   anonymous39posted 5 years ago

   I got married the end of last year and soon realized I had made a mistake by rushing into marriage too soon.  I since ask my husband to leave as he turns out to be verbally abusive and confrontational so I wasn't waiting for things to get worse.  I have read and seen too many horror stories of murder suicide of couples.  As of last weekend he decided to take his revenge by taking back the car he bought me in both of our names(knowing my credit his mess up so I can't get one on my own), as well as emptying out our joint bank account leaving me with nothing which he did without my knowledge.  I have been home since unable to get to work as my hours are late evening going into late night which is not bus accessible by then.  I am a loner with no family around that can help me so I ask you all, "What can I do."

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      Dale Hydeposted 5 years ago in reply to this

      The only recommendation I can think of is to check with your local social services for job transportation.

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         anonymous39posted 5 years ago in reply to this

         Thanks for your reply I will check them out.

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            Dale Hydeposted 5 years ago in reply to this

            You are most welcome. Where I live we can dial 211 for such services.

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   michememeposted 5 years ago

   Yes, check with churches as well. They are a big help in communities, often calling on church members to assist you in the best way possible. I am not sure what state you are in, but certain states have transportation that runs well into the late evening hours. This should be able to get you to work, if not you may have to leave for work a little earlier than usual to ensure you get to the place that is helping you maintain your bills.

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      anonymous39posted 5 years ago in reply to this

      Thanks for your advise I will check that out too.  I am not too worried about getting to work as I am about getting home from work.

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   Bedbugabscondposted 5 years ago

   See if your community has a Community Action Partnership. They usually have services to help woman in abusive relationships. Our CAP has safe houses where you can go to "hide" while they help you get back on your feet. Good luck.

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      anonymous39posted 5 years ago in reply to this

      Thank you for your support, I am actually scared he might still have a copy of the house key so I sleep with my bedroom door shut and my phone nearby.

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   bbuchanan76posted 5 years ago

   I have to agree with the above statement.  You need to find a place that is safe where he has no clue.  If you still feel unsafe, ask about getting a restraining order againist him.  Don't think that you are in the wrong for wanting outof this situation.  No one deserves it.

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      anonymous39posted 5 years ago in reply to this

      I looked up getting a restraining order which doesn't seem easy to get without sufficient evidence.  I also tried to report the car stolen but could not since it is in both of our names.  I thank everyone for their support and advice.

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   Hypersapienposted 5 years ago

   Obviously, you are going to have to file for divorce.  While the divorce is pending, you can ask for spousal maintenance - especially since he cleaned out the bank accounts and left you destitute. 
   
   If the car was purchased for you after the marriage, it is a marital asset (not to mention the fact that it is in both your names) and he can't just take it back as his own personal property.  I would also ask that the car be returned while the divorce is pending.
   
   There is quite possibly a local women's shelter or support group that you can turn to for aid.  Also, you might want to check with your local bar association to see if they have any kind of pro bono program so that you can get legal help at no charge.

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      anonymous39posted 5 years ago in reply to this

      Thank you for your advise I could really use some pro bono help right now.  I will look into that.

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