Should I Go Gray Or Not
When I go to purchase my hair color this time I am going to seriously ponder the question, "do I or don't I color my hair." I've been asked, "why don't you let your hair go gray? My response is I don't feel gray, yet, but when I do, I will. Well, am I feeling gray yet, maybe, maybe not? Now if you ask me how do you feel gray? My answer will be "I don't know." Although I think I will know it when I feel it. I am 62 years old, ( I said it, yes I did, 62), and I still color my hair. I constantly hear, "you don't look your age," now, I don't say that, others do. So I've, as they say bought into that. So if we can say feeling gray is a state of mind, then we can say that my state of mind is not gray yet. This generation is so youth conscious that we are conditioned to stay young at all cost. Some say, "grow old gracefully, others say I'm not going gracefully, I'm going to fight it all the way." I seem to be somewhere in the middle.
My hair seems to be tied to the my overall lifestyle. Some days I'll wear slightly tight jeans, other days I'll wear jeans I bought in the eighties, the ones that come up to the bottom of the breastbone, and look like they are three sizes too big (comfy). Some days I listen to Beyonce,T. I., Nelly, Toni Braxton, etc, other days I listen to Brook Benton, Sam Cooke, The Supremes, Patti La Belle, Michael Bolton, etc. Thanks to my adult children, I can move easily between the two genres of music.
Make no mistake, I am not casting dispersion on gray hair. I think gray hair on some is very beautiful. As a matter of fact I have several good friends with totally gray hair, and it in no way diminishes their beauty. One in particular has long beautiful gray hair, and if I had to hazard a guess, I would say she probably doesn't feel gray either, it's just her hair. My reasoning on that is her dress, and conversation, in my opinion, is not indicative of a person that "feels" gray. Remember, I said, I thought it was a state of mind, so I would surmise the gray state of mind, is different for all.
Why I began to color my hair
I was not always self-conscious about my hair. During the early nineties, my hair was beginning to salt and pepper, and I did like the look. However, I could never begin a conversation unless I got my hair out of the way first. You see, because I looked "too young" to have gray hair (so they said), I was, at times asked "is it premature?" I had a well meaning friend say, it didn't become me, (my gray hair). A husband of a friend use to compare my gray hair with his.
The turning point came one night during a networking event for my business. At one point, I was making a pitch for the man's business, and, during the pitch, I noticed the man kept looking at my head, I thought he had a problem with eye contact, so I excused it. When I thought, ah ha, I got him now, I went in for the kill, I casually mentioned my children, I don't know why at that point, but anyway he said, "which one gave you all that gray."Pow! There went my bubble. I don't know whether he ever used my business, but the next day I went out and bought my first bottle of hair color, and I haven't looked back since, I'm hooked. I've been working on my hair, (see my hub, How I Grew My Kinky Hair With Little Money), and I've worn a wig for months, I'm at the stage where I've taken on the skunk look, ( oh, you've seen the look, just picture it). I am about to come out of the wig and now I have to make the decision as to whether I should color or not.
I like me, I like who I've become, gray hair and all, however, at this time, I haven't made a decision, about my gray hair. Whatever decision I make will be mine, based on how I feel. I've grown enough, now, not to let others make up my mind for me. So when you make a life altering decision (albeit minor), make it based on your own feelings, not on what others have to say. So I say, to "gray or not to gray," that is the question, for me?