Cell phones & grocery shopping just don't mix
One day I stopped to get a simple gallon of milk at the local grocery store the other day, and I saw a sight which has transformed my life forever. Just as I was walking past the deli section, I witnessed a cell phone set off a chain of wild events, that would baffle just about anyone's mind. I saw her coming full blast out of the corner of my right eye. She barreled on in from out of nowhere from around a blind corner. This lady was rolling her grocery cart down the soda isle and talking on her cell phone without a care in the world, and not paying anymore attention to what was going on around her than the man on the moon.
She was in another complete world at this time, and totally preoccupied on her cell phone when she entered the isle way that I was in. She blew past me like I was standing still, knocking the milk right out of my hand and into the potato chip bin. It all happened from that point forward in slow motion. I saw what was getting ready to happen next, but there was no time for me to yell out a warning to others.
This little old lady was stooping down to select her favorite brand of cat food when all of a sudden there was this big collision. The poor old lady landed on top of a bag of Kibbles 'n bits. At that point the old lady's grocery cart shot across the produce isle slamming into a display of peanut butter knocking it all into the candy isle and fresh fruit section. There were apples mixed in with the bananas and the oranges, and there were seedless grapes all over the hazel nuts. Can goods were scattered about as far away as Tony Romo could throw a football. Not to mention peanut butter all over the dark chocolate and chocolate in the peanut butter. However I'm not so sure who would eat something like that.
She basically left a massive trail of destruction as far as the human eye could see. No one was hurt in all of this commotion , but it certainly was one big mess. And the entire time the woman never stopped talking on her cell phone, or even looked back to see all the damage that she had caused. A matter of fact she went through the checkout line and left the store completely, still talking on her phone, totally unaware of the fiasco that was going on behind her. Maybe there needs to be some kind of a law to be passed to stop people from walking and talking on their cell phones, especially while grocery shopping. That might sound like crazy talk, but next time it may just save another old lady from being knocked into a bag of dog food
While on the subject of cell phones let me tell you about another story. A friend of mine or maybe it would be best to refer to him as an acquaintance got a free cell phone the other day. It was a top of the line model with 4G and all of the bells and whistles. Very expensive to say the least, and it didn't cost him a cent. You see he lives in a houseboat, and orders things through the mail. He has the items sent directly to his house boat. He saw an unbelievable cell phone offer on television, so he took advantage of it. When I say he took advantage of it, I mean that's exactly what he did. After he received the cell phone in the mail at his house boat, he picked up anchor and moved his boat to another location. According to him, he's now the proud owner of the newest cell phone model on the market. However if I was you I wouldn't try this at home.
