How Do I Know If I Am Pregnant and Other Nonsense

Hahahahaha this was very entertaining. You could be a comedian!

Billybuc, why spend money on movies and popcorn when Google can entertain you forever for free? Loved it!

I appreciate the good laugh while I am at work. Seriously if someone has to ask "hey could I have herpes?" its probably safe to assume he or she does! I'm always amazed at the level of stupidity we can find if we know where to look ;) I want a How do I know when to... Hub next!

Bill, thank you for making me laugh this morning!!!

Truly unique hub. Very clever writing and it made me laugh! Good work, billybuc! Voting up, interesting and awesome. =)

Brilliant my firend billy;classic and so very funny;take care and have a wonderful day.

I always remember a friend of mine many years ago being marched to the doctor many years ago by her mother;who had a very hot temper;and oh dear the unmentionable was diagnosed !!!

Her mother's face was thunderous;and her poor daughter who was petrified of her mother's temper spluttered claiming she had not 'slept'with anyone;the doctor of the old school type shouted at her with these words;

"Who do you think you are;Mary ??!!

At this point her mother turned on the doctor for talking to her dauhgter in this tone and marched out with her arm round her vowing to go back in and tear another strip out of the offending doctor.

I had clean forgotten this until I read you great hub.

An up up and away here!!!

Enjoy your day.

Eddy.

Eddy.

Beautifully done. Voted up and funny!

Very entertaining and funny!

haha...Bill I hereby declare that you have a good sense of humor and your idea for this hub wasFAN-tastic.

Keep it rocking, buddy!

This was fun to read and funny! Thanks for brightening my day.

hmmmm. how do I know if I liked this hub????????????????????

because it made me laugh! thanks billybuc!!!

Yes..you can be my VP...you have no power whatsoever, just like Biden.

Okay thanks so much billybuc, same here. Nice to meet you!

This was really cool, I feel the same way. Some people can be real ding-a-lings. I love your sense of humor, great article!

bill...you just made my day. All I have ever aspired to be in life is a "shoe-in" as chairwoman for Wise-Asses Anonymous. Sincere thanks! I don't care what they all say about you bill....I LIKE YOU!!!

Yes, billybuc, you do have a sense of humor, and for my part it's one of you better "inner figures." Keep it coming. Thanks for SHARING. Sandra Busby

I'm starting to look forward to these hubs! My favorite line: "if you have asked any of the first four questions then chances are he likes you!"

I guess it's promising that more people are asking about their water breaking than finding out if they're pregnant. If they're asking the former that at least means they've figured out the latter.

bill....These questions cannot be read with a straight face...no way. Oh my...THE FUN A GROUP OF WISE-ASSES COULD HAVE TOGETHER, COMING UP WITH ANSWERS FOR THESE MORONS....you know I'd be right in there, throwing out zingers.

Seriously bill? There can be ONE acceptable reason anyone would need to ask these questions: They're all age 10 and under........Thanks for the laughter. UP++

Common sense is not so common! Very entertaining hub

Ha. Ha. Ha. You are a gem. I suppose if you could magically answer all those questions, you would be God. The Internet God. Yes, you could plug yourself was IG or even IGGI: Internet God for Google Idiots. :D

I voted "awesome". On the flip side of the coin, I still feel a bit sad, after 45 years, recalling the look on the nerd's face that had mustered up the nerve to ask me to the prom and I turned down...Knowing what I know now, I'd pick a nerd over the jock I eventually married and divorced anyday. Who knows, maybe Janice has come to her senses after all this time.

Very funny. Thanks for the laughs. Voted up and funny. Socially shared.

I have realized that I am completely infatuated with your writing! Yes, I typed that (but I didn't have to type "How Do I Know If I Am Infatuated With Someone's Writing" first!) here on HubPages for all to see. I love that you can be serious, funny, and sometimes both in one hub. I really do enjoy reading your work and sit patiently awaiting the next fix.

You made me laugh again Bill...Reminds me of the supposedly true story of the woman that called tech support because her computer had a blank screen. The tech guy went through 30 minutes or so of questions and the woman could not answer him. Finally, in desperation and possibly as a joke, he asked her if it was plugged in. Well when she asked if it needed to be plugged in he said, OK put the computer back in the box and send it back to the store. The woman asked why and he said, "Because you are too stupid to own a computer".

Thank you bill for another great hub!

Too funny! Love it!

BUT there was a news article not too long ago about a woman who suddenly had some pains one day, went into the bathroom and then, to her total surprise, delivered a baby! And she and her boyfriend both seemed believable when they said they didn't even know she was "preg".

So hilarious! You can be so serious and then so comical. I love this side of you. Well done hub. I would hit the refreshing and hilarious buttons if they existed, but, since they don't, I'll go with interesting, funny, awesome, and VOTE UP! Sharing, too! Way to go!

Another fun read...now the next time I have a free moment, I am going to google "How do I..." just to see the results! (Or just wait til you do another one of these and let you do all the work!)

This one is laugh out loud funny. I think if you are googling whether or not your are stupid you just answered your own question. Hilarious!!! This reminds me of when I joined Facebook. There were tons of quizes to take. I thought they were cute. I found out which Muppet I was, what my stipper name was. One day I was bored and took the quiz, "How to Know if You Are a Potato." When I got the results back and I was thrilled to learn I wasn't one, I told myself I really had to stop doing thes things. Great hub! Thanks for the giggles.

Nice to see there are still plenty of people who have made it into maturity (I count myself as one) and have managed to retain their sense of humour. Humour is the best weapon!

Hi, hilarious! you certainly hit the proverbial nail on the head! I do webanswers, and I sit in front of the pc shaking my head muttering, oh God, oh you got to be kidding me, etc! its the way they spell the question that drives me mad, for example tonight, someone asked, am I pregon? What?!!! how the heck do I know? whats pregon? is it related to klingon?!! if she means pregnant then god help that poor child! haha!

No wonder it didn't work if you had pedals on your cloverleaf - or is that what they have in the US?! Sorry, that was cruel! Great laugh! You certainly don't need to ask how you know if you're a writer - just look at all these comments and those in the rest of your hubs and you have your answer. Another good one, billy. Up, funny & interesting.

good fun

Beings PracticalMommy already addressed my secondary thoughts to your humor, I can laugh.

It is funny how people run to the internet to ask seemingly ridiculous questions.

One thing to remember though, while they are asking those questions there is room to make money on Hubpages as we continue to answer them. Perhaps that's the true craziness of it all. If you ask, someone has answered.

This is quite funny! I'm glad to see you take a walk on the lighter side of things for at least a minute. Well-done Bill.

Billybuc! You have just become a rival in the humor department. How dare you?! I want inspiration and uplifting words from you!!!

Of course, i am kidding as well. Another great one, sir! Hilarious indeed!

Billybuc, you're right...after reading, I still don't think you're funny-HA!

Just kidding of course...I had a good chuckle even before I read the article. I did a double take on the title and author. "Did Billy just wrote a hub on pregnancy?!!" I agree, some of the questions are ridiculous.

Thanks for the laugh. Voted up and...sure why not, 'funny'!:-D

Funny stuff! I do have to address two of the first questions, though. It's a myth that when a woman's water breaks, it automatically puddles onto the floor like it does in the movies. This only happens very few times to few women. In fact, the water may only come out in a small, continuous trickle (okay, gross, I know!), which is why some women question whether or not the bag of waters has broken. Of course, if they go to a birthing/labor class or read a book, they would learn this...

The second question is asked by women who panic in the first few hours/days/weeks after having intercourse. These are women (mostly young women) who do not understand the mechanics of getting pregnant (hence my hub about when to take a home pregnancy test, lol). They think that by asking the question someone online can magically wave a wand and determine whether or not they're pregnant. Sad, isn't it? As many of us on WebAnswers answer, a woman wouldn't know if she was pregnant until she a. missed a period, b. took an hpt, or c. visited a doctor. But that answer isn't widely accepted because these women want to know NOW! ;)

Love these hubs! Keep them coming!

Actually (not just in a fake, instant message way) laugh out loud funny. It is amazing how many stupid questions people ask the Internet. Sometimes I just type in dumb questions to see how many people have actually a) looked for that question and b) answered it! Voted funny and up.

Another awesome hub! People search for the craziest stuff. I write for WebAnswers and the most popular questions are always, "How do I know who is the father of my baby?" Apparently, there are a lot of women out there having sex with a number of different guys in the same week. Actually, a scary amount of women are asking this question. Sigh. Sometimes I just wonder what is going on out there! Voted up and awesome!

Bill, it's always great to read these hubs from your lighter side. Well done! I admit, I never could tell when a guy liked me, leading me to unintentionally break a few hearts. Sorry guys! BUt that is part of growing up. And we eventually get it right. Right? I can't help but wonder how many less that intelligent people are out there searching the internet for clues about if he/she likes/loves them because they jumped into the sack a little too soon and are now putting on a few pounds and craving pickles or feeling an unusual itchy/burning sensation (yes, i went there). Perhaps instead of a computer these folks need to get themselves an education and some social skills! Thanks for the laugh!