Collection of the Funniest Requests Made On HubPages: Part III

I Just Can't Help Myself!

I am at it again!! Here is round three of the funniest and stupidest requests made on HubPages. Some of these make no sense to me, and some are just too funny not to tackle. I hope you enjoy reading this third installment as much as I enjoyed writing it! It is just too much fun not to do this every now and then.

The Third Installment of Silly and Stupid Requests

What not to do in front of children:

Well, if you have to ask this question, then maybe you just shouldn't have children. I guess I will answer it anyway. There are a lot of things you shouldn't do in front of children; like make crystal meth, yet, some people still do it. Sex...having sex is another thing you shouldn't do in front of children. It messes with their heads. You can tell them that you are exercising, but really, kids today are not that stupid. Basically, don't do anything in front of your kids that you wouldn't do out in public. Oh, and never, ever do anything fun in front of your children! They may want to join in and have fun, too. If kids think you like to have fun, they might want to have fun, too. That would be bad. How's that??

Don't put food on your dog's head in front of your children. It leads to way too many messes...
Don't put food on your dog's head in front of your children. It leads to way too many messes...

How to astral project:

Ummm...let's see...first, you have to travel to the magical world of unicorns and magic beans. After that, climb the misty mountain to find a wise, old wizard, and he should be able to give you some pointers. I think their might be a magic ball involved, or maybe some potion, or something. I'm not really sure on the details. I do know that it will be a lot of work, so you might be better off just driving, or walking, to wherever you need to go. Besides, if you astral project, you can't really do anything once you get there. Being just a spirit, and all.

I'm sure it looks just like this...
I'm sure it looks just like this...

Why is it so hard to like Heather Mills?:

Really?? You have to ask this question?? I thought it was obvious, but whatever. It's hard to like her because she married one of the best musicians ever, and then divorced him and took a bunch of his money! She is a hateful woman, and there is no reason to like her. Personally, I think anyone who sees her should be allowed to throw rotten apples at her. And, for those of you that think I should have sympathy for her because she is missing a leg...well, who cares?? Is it my fault she has a missing leg? Does that make what she did any less terrible?

This was the most flattering picture I could find of Heather Mills.
This was the most flattering picture I could find of Heather Mills.

How many hours a day we can watch television?:

Do I look like your mother? Seriously? Do I?? I don't think it's really up to me to decide how many hours a day you watch television. Do whatever the heck you want!! If I was your mother, however, I would take a way your television until you can learn to put together a sentence. "No TV until you finish your homework" was one popular mantra of my mother. That and "If you don't eat your meat, how can you have any pudding? How can you have any pudding if you don't eat your meat?" It wasn't until I was older that I got the reference to Pink Floyd. Looking back, my parents were pretty cool!!!

hai it is a gopod hub:

Ummm...what? What's a gopod? Is it an adjective describing a hub? If I take out the 'p', it says good hub. Are you asking for a good hub? My best guess as to the request is, "Hey, let's go to the pub!" Well, that sounds like a great idea!! I will meet you there at 8pm CST!! First round is on you!

First round is on you
First round is on you

Sir, Danish here:

First off, I am a woman, so please do not address me as sir. Ma'am would be fine, but I prefer if you just use my name. Such formalities are not necessary, but thank you for the sign of respect, just the same. Second, I really don't understand. Are you Danish? Or, are you a Danish? If it is the former, good for you!! I have great respect for the Danes, and the Danish culture. If it is the later, and you are, in fact, a pastry. Please, find your way to my house. I love danish!! Especially with strawberry! It's great for breakfast with a nice cup of coffee!! Thank you!

Mmm...Danish...
Mmm...Danish...

Say mom what really brought down Flight 1549:

OK. "Mom what really brought down Flight 1549." Is that all? Is there anything else you need? I hope that helps you in some way. Have a nice day. If you are asking me a question...I guess I have to respond, though, as I stated before, I am not your mom. As to what really brought down Flight 1549...well, I have no idea. Google it like everyone else.

A love hub:

I believe this was already covered quite nicely in a previous HubMob, but I will do my best. I love Hubs! I love HubPages! I love to write! I love to Hub! Love, love, love....love, love, love...all you need is love. Love makes the world go round. Love is a many splendored thing.

All You Need Is Love

add me a iwll add me im in middle scholl and i make a's b's:

What?? I don't get it. Is this some kind of joke? How do you make A's and B's in middle school when you can't even spell school?? No capitalization, no punctuation. When I was in middle school, we had to spell correctly, and use proper punctuation and capitalization. You are obviously lying. I can't stand liars!! So, I will not be adding you.

Who cares that i love to collect all brand bags n leather??? but the main topic is, should i waste all my money just for all this brandy bags???:

Who is Brandy? Why do you want to buy her bags? What's with all the extra question marks??? Thank you for pointing out what the main topic should be. I appreciate that. Should you waste all your money just for all this brandy bags? My answer would be, sure, why not? Why bother with food, or anything else when you can buy Brandy's bags. I guess she doesn't need them anymore.

nasarurahman@yahoo.com,nasarurahman@yahoo.com,nasarurahman@yahoo.com:

I guess someone really wanted their email address out there, and who am I to stand in their way? I don't know how this translates into a quality Hub, but wow, that is a hard email address to remember. I don't understand why they had to include it three times in the request, or what they are really after, but hey, that's the fun of it, isn't it? nasarurahman@yahoo.com, whoever you are, I hope this answers your request! If not, I really don't care all that much.

© 2009 Anna Marie Bowman

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Comments 39 comments

Anna Marie Bowman profile image

Anna Marie Bowman 2 years ago from Florida Author

Rehma--Thank you!!


Rehma Jamshed profile image

Rehma Jamshed 2 years ago

One of the funniest hubs I have come across! Gopod hub ;-)


Cantuhearmescream profile image

Cantuhearmescream 3 years ago from New York

It's super funny, I'm really trying to get over to some of your other hubs, because I saw you had quite a few that I'm dying to read too!


Anna Marie Bowman profile image

Anna Marie Bowman 3 years ago from Florida Author

Cantuhearmescream-- Thank you so much!!! These are still some of my favorite hubs that I have written.


Cantuhearmescream profile image

Cantuhearmescream 3 years ago from New York

Anna Marie Bowman,

Oh my goodness, this has to be one of the funniest, most enjoyable hubs I've read... I must find One and Two! I just love your approach and sense of humor; it's funny, you answered a lot of things that I have long been wondering.

I could comment on each thing you talked about, but your lack of sympathy for Heather Mills was awesomely beautiful. Loved it!

Voted up, Funny and Awesome!


Anna Marie Bowman profile image

Anna Marie Bowman 5 years ago from Florida Author

Susie-- I haven't done one of these in a long time. I think it's about time I did!!


SUSIE DUZY profile image

SUSIE DUZY 5 years ago from Delray Beach, Florida

Good Hub, I needed a good laugh. I am sure you will have more material in the near future.


Anna Marie Bowman profile image

Anna Marie Bowman 6 years ago from Florida Author

Nick B-- Not trying to be a jerk, it's more for my own amusement. That, and it was actually a hubpages request, for the silliest requests on hubpages. I had to do it. I think I could even go through and do a few more. It's a lot of fun!


Nick B profile image

Nick B 6 years ago from Normandy, France

It's just impossible to be polite to some of these people isn't it?

I too have had my fair share of breakdowns where I've just said what I think rather than what I know I ought to put - which is nothing, close the page, go make coffee anything, just don't answer...

Too late.


Anna Marie Bowman profile image

Anna Marie Bowman 6 years ago from Florida Author

Sally-- Have fun!!


Sally's Trove profile image

Sally's Trove 7 years ago from Southeastern Pennsylvania

Yes, thank you for the info about the request. I figured that out as soon as I clicked your first Hub link above. Now I know what I'm going to be doing for a good part of the afternoon!


Anna Marie Bowman profile image

Anna Marie Bowman 7 years ago from Florida Author

Sally's Trove-- Thank you! It wasn't my idea. The credit for that goes to a request, and the first answer to the request made by ProfoundPuns. You should go read those, too!!


Sally's Trove profile image

Sally's Trove 7 years ago from Southeastern Pennsylvania

These are great. What a clever idea. I think all of us produce a few stray funny thoughts each time we see an unintelligible request, but you took the step to put the thoughts into words. Great words!

Now I'm off to read the other two, and I'm hoping your collection Hubs will continue. Sure is enough new fodder out there every day.


Anna Marie Bowman profile image

Anna Marie Bowman 7 years ago from Florida Author

Karen-- Hmmm...now that would explain a lot!!! Where do you find a bag full of brandy? Do they sell that right along with boxes of wine?


Karen Banes profile image

Karen Banes 7 years ago from Canada

Love it. Could Ms Brandy Bags be referring to a bag full of brandy? Could she have just drunk a bag full of brandy? That would explain a lot.


Anna Marie Bowman profile image

Anna Marie Bowman 7 years ago from Florida Author

sixty-- Just doing my best to bring a smile to everyone's face!!! Glad I could make you laugh!!


sixtyorso profile image

sixtyorso 7 years ago from South Africa

Thanks for a good laugh!


Anna Marie Bowman profile image

Anna Marie Bowman 7 years ago from Florida Author

Shalini-- Glad I could make you laugh your you-know-what off!!!! Yes, I do go searching through those zillions of requests. Usually, I just pop over there ever day or so, and see what's been added, jot a couple down, until I have enough for another hub. Other times, I pour through all the unaswered requests, because that is were some of the best ones end up.


Shalini Kagal profile image

Shalini Kagal 7 years ago from India

Anna - laughing my you-know-what off! I must read Parts I and II - I might just die laughing but who cares? Do you really go poking around all those zillions of requests - well, it paid off - you've found some real nuggets!!!!!


Anna Marie Bowman profile image

Anna Marie Bowman 7 years ago from Florida Author

Mrs Hozey-- Thank you!!! Yeah, it can be pretty difficult to figure out what some of them say. It's part of what makes doing these fun!!! Check out the ones similar to this posted by ProfoundPuns!!! Those are great!!!


Mrs Hozey profile image

Mrs Hozey 7 years ago

Oh my gosh. Those are great. I love the ones that can't spell and expect you to figure out what the heck they're saying.


Anna Marie Bowman profile image

Anna Marie Bowman 7 years ago from Florida Author

rodney-- Thanks for the clarification!! I thought for a second that I had missed something, and that you were talking about the little furry things from the movie!! Guess I had a short circuit of my own somewhere!!

glassvisage-- Yeah, I remember that saying. "There are no stupid questions." LOL!!! I kept them anonymous, but I could have been mean, and pointed out every hubber that made them.

Pam-- If I could fan you twice or three times, I would, as well!!!! Glad I could make you laugh!!!


Pam Roberson profile image

Pam Roberson 7 years ago from Virginia

Bravo! You're like the silly request answering guru! Gosh, if I could fan you twice or even thrice I would. :) I was rolling on the floor with your answers! :D


glassvisage profile image

glassvisage 7 years ago from Northern California

Good logic on the middle-school kid who supposedly makes A's and B's :) I never thought to compile all of the random trash requests (kind of like when teachers say that there are no stupid questions, but really...). Thanks for making fun of anonymous people for us.


Just_Rodney profile image

Just_Rodney 7 years ago from Johannesberg South Africa, The Gold Mine City

Gremlins, those funny little short circuits between brain and fingers on the keyboard.

Gremilins = grammatical skill shortage, again a short circuit.


Anna Marie Bowman profile image

Anna Marie Bowman 7 years ago from Florida Author

dave-- Requests are a great tool if you are ever stuck on something to write about!! There are so many requests, that I am sure anyone can find something to write about, that may help others out! Also, requests are a great way to get a question answered. Just make sure that the question can result in an actual Hub, with actual content, not just a short answer.


daveearley profile image

daveearley 7 years ago from Chicago, IL

Ah, you mean a Hub request? I always wondered what that link was for. LOL

Well, at least they weren't real Hub titles.


Anna Marie Bowman profile image

Anna Marie Bowman 7 years ago from Florida Author

No, these are not titles of Hubs. These are requests people have made.


daveearley profile image

daveearley 7 years ago from Chicago, IL

Are these hub titles you are making fun of? LOL

The title is supposed to make you want to read, not make you want to make fun of whatever was written that isn't going to get read. LOL


Anna Marie Bowman profile image

Anna Marie Bowman 7 years ago from Florida Author

GT-- I'm glad you read this, too, and that it has improved your self-esteem. Not the intended purpose, but hey, life is full of surprises!!! Like being duct taped in a closet!!


goldentoad profile image

goldentoad 7 years ago from Free and running....

I'm glad I read this. Now I can confirm there are people in worst shape than me. funny stuff AMB.


Anna Marie Bowman profile image

Anna Marie Bowman 7 years ago from Florida Author

bgpappa-- Thank you!!

Rodney-- gremlins??

funride-- I hope so!! I love doing these!! It's a fun departure from some of the other stuff I do.

elena-- Yes, it really was! Astral projection is the ability to project your spirit outside of your body. Some believe that you can send your spirit out and travel outside of your body.

FeniqueS-- Great idea!!! I can just see it now!! Some sort of mobile pod, that dispenses coffee and danish! It should be trademarked immediately!!

Ardie-- Thanks!! That one I wasn't too sure about. I didn't know how it would go over. Glad you thought it was funny!!

C. C. Riter-- Thank you!! Glad I could make you chuckle!!!


C. C. Riter 7 years ago

Very funny hub Anna Marie, good job. Made me chuckel more than a few times as I read your many answers to these stupid requests. thanks still chuckeling


Ardie profile image

Ardie 7 years ago from Neverland

HA! Those are great...and to be honest, I saw quite a few of those and had similar thoughts, especially about the one with the middle schooler who makes A's and B's :) Very funny...


FeniqueS profile image

FeniqueS 7 years ago from Home

I Loved IT!!! and what is a gopod? maybe they could put it with Sir, Danish and start a new branch of Starbucks..Sir, gopod Danish for you today? With or without cream? they just touch screen up there flavor of Danish and go.


Elena. profile image

Elena. 7 years ago from Madrid

"How to astral project", what the heck is that?  Good answer, though! Laugh!

"add me a will add me im in middle scholl and i make a's b's"  sorry, I have to ask, was this really up here somewhere?  How come I always miss ALL the fun?!

Thanks for the continued entertainment, and the patience to gather all these odd (to call them something gentle) requests! :-)


funride profile image

funride 7 years ago from Portugal

Another great one, I love the way you anwser so many useless requests and make it a very nice and funny hub. I`m sure you`ll have much more material to work on in the near future lol.


Just_Rodney profile image

Just_Rodney 7 years ago from Johannesberg South Africa, The Gold Mine City

Good hub, great hub. Sometimes we have gremlins, sometimes the gremlins are us.


bgpappa profile image

bgpappa 7 years ago from Sacramento, California

Good stuff.

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