Have you told "thank you" to anyone in your family lately?

1. 77

   ripplemakerposted 16 years ago

   It's silly but sometimes I notice that people sometimes take for granted the people that are closest to their hearts.  And so our thanks are said casually and for politeness sake. And because that is what we've learned in kindergarten. :-)  But do we ever really pause for awhile and truly appreciate our family?  The kind of gratitude that makes one catch one's breath or causes a tear to fall or makes one realize that life wouldn't be the same without them -- you know, suddenly you see them in a much different and better way? 
   
   In our family, we are not very demonstrative with words of appreciation or affection.  It's awkward and uncomfortable.  But since I tried doing it, it felt really good.  And once, I asked everyone to gather around during the Holy Week to have a Gratitude session. I asked them to say "thank you" and to be specific.  I was very happy and touched with the turn-out.  It was truly a blessing.  Let's strive to keep the gratitude alive as often as we can.  Merry CHristmas.

   replyreport
2. 62

   Dottie1posted 16 years ago

   Words of wisdom for all to embrace.  Nicely said Ripplemaker and a nice reminder to thank those closest to us more often.

   replyreport
3. 0

   StacyPposted 16 years ago

   Great post!
   
   It's so important to convey our appreciation to family members. It really does make a difference in family dynamics in the long haul. For instance, if you're a stay-at-home parent, say thanks to your spouse for financially supporting the family (even on those days when you're up to your ears in dirty diapers and tantrums and your spouse's outside job seems like bliss compared to your duties). Your spouse will work harder for the family, knowing you are supportive and appreciative of their efforts.

   replyreport
4. 77

   ripplemakerposted 16 years ago

   Hi Stacy and Dottie.  Welcome to the Gratitude Club!  I know you value this as much as i do.

   replyreport
5. 49

   strandedrose4386posted 16 years ago

   helo my name is norma jay bertrand the writer4386/homeless international poet of the usa/10th nominee and my stories can be rated and seen on hbo.com blogger by going to google.com search block and typing in my screen name strandedrose4386 and itll take you to my hbo.com profile and when you get there go below it and youll see my latest pros and its in my upcomming book that will be finished in late feb or march/08 and in it will be the latest story i just did on a family and i thought it would be nice to jion hub pages and reply to you over it the prose is called room#148 read it and email me or call over it;your comments are welcomed;email me at strandedrose4386@yahoo.com or call me at my cell as i am in meunester,texas in library now;at 1-409=-767-3118;yes we all need to realise how much a love one who passes in a family like i did my dad;and i dearly miss him but i never got to say i love him or say goodbye;due to my sister carolyn kaye prejean edwards/hossman;of either by nacogdoches,texas or lufkin,texas where i am from;give me a rang folks ill be waiting in the open arms;

   replyreport
6. 82

   blessedmommyposted 16 years ago

   I am VERY thankful for my family.  I have a great husband and three wonderful kids that I can't imagine my life without.  "I love you's" are very common in our home as well as hugs, kisses and "thank you's." 
   I also am the oldest child of five and I have a rich heritage.  Our holidays are always so special, warm and happy filled with love, food and friendship. 
   Yes, your family can often be some of your best friends.  My mother and my sister are some of the most wonderful women in the world and my father is strong both in faith and physically.  My brothers, are all handsome young men that have very different personalities but they are all gems. I have one sister in law on my side, one on my husband's side and will have another in April.  I have 2 nieces and 3 nephews so far. 
   My husband's family is also wonderful.  I have no complaints to give on my in-laws.  They treat me just like a daughter.

   replyreport
7. 80

   VioletSunposted 16 years ago

   Just found this hub! Oh, yes, I always, always say thank you to my mate and family. I tell my mate, "thank you for being you" and he does the same. We do this constantly, not just on holidays. 
   
   I have an older nephew who is a teacher and came back to the USA from Thailand with his beautiful Thai wife and neither one of them, say "thank you", not for gifts exchanged, or help extended, and this is very strange for me and sis. They do enjoy what is being extended by the smiles, but nary a thank you! :::scratching head::::::   One shouldn't have expectations, but being human, sometimes just saying a simple thank you, is appreciated.
   
   And, thank you for creating this thread!

   replyreport
8. 77

   ripplemakerposted 16 years ago

   Hello BlessedMommy & VioletSun (great names by the way), it's wonderful to hear how grateful you are of your family and extended families.  Love shared and given are blessings we should thank for everyday...for they make life truly special and meaningful. 
   
   Hahhaha Violet I had to laugh at the image of you scratching your head...I think I too would wonder why it was difficult for them to say Thank You?
   
   Do you know my best friend's dad is dying of cancer (stage 4) and last night she was able to tell her dad thank you for all the things he had done for her and the family.  I was so teary eyed today because I know they are not the family of words...but I was glad she did.  So why wait for tomorrow to say thank you when we can do it today?

   replyreport
9. 59

   NatalieTMposted 16 years ago

   Thank you. ;-)
   
   I recalled when my kids were little. On their birthdays we'd form a "gratitude circle"  and the person of honor got to hear, one person at a time, why they were grateful for them.
   
   At first, it might feel awkward being the center of that kind of attention, but by the time you hear the third or fourth person extol their appreciation, it's almost impossible not to feel elated!
   
   I've since done this at parties with adults, in board rooms and most recently at a nursing home.  I'm a big fan of appreciation!

   replyreport
10. 77

    ripplemakerposted 16 years ago

    Natalie, wow, that is so nice to hear.  I like that...gratitude circle.  When we start to become grateful, our perspective changes...and suddenly, more beautiful things come to life.  Thanks for sharing.

    replyreport
11. 80

    VioletSunposted 16 years ago

    When I work out on the treadmill, I often say my affirmations, healing prayers and state my gratitude for everything, even the trees outside the window. I don't merely say the words, I feel it in my heart center. You know as when one feels love for another person.  Its a fun way of exercising because it makes time pass by quickly. When I am done, I feel uplilfted,  I exercised not only my body but my spirit too.

    replyreport
12. 77

    ripplemakerposted 16 years ago

    Beautiful way of exercising, VioletSun.  When every act is done with gratitude, life becomes full...abundant..joyful.  :-)  I enjoyed reading your hubs today.  Especially the one about the water crystal healing...my friend and I was just reading about it in a book.  hahaha  great coincidences. Thanks for sharing. 
    
    I also thanked the person who often makes me smile.  I love laughing.  Brings out the child in me all the time. :-)

    replyreport
    1. 80

       VioletSunposted 16 years agoin reply to this

       >>>
       
       Would you  believe I couldn't ' find this forum until my brain cells suggested to  type "gratitude" in the search field, and here I am. LOL! Thanks for your comments, and I love the confirmations.

       replyreport
13. 60

    Betty Jo Pettyposted 16 years ago

    Hi to Everyone,
    
    I am glad I found this.  People being nice!
    
    I have been striving to make sure I say 'Thank You' for even the most minor of things done for me. 
    
    We are a family of seven. Parents, two sons, one daughter, two wonderful little grandsons.
    
    My youngest son has been staying/moving in with his girlfriend and some other young adults. So sad for me, but at that age, I understand.
    
    I think if I say it, and they hear it enough, it will be repeated.  Perhaps even many years after I am gone!
    
    A wise sister-in-law noticed when he was very small, just learning to talk, I didn't have my oldest grandson, five now, say 'thank you' after being given a cookie.  After leaving her kitchen, she told me they say thank you after handing their grandchildren such things.  Such a wonderful lesson for me.  Now, both grandsons say, 'thank you, your welcome' and more!
    
    Thanks for all these nice words.
    
    I'm Betty Jo Petty - AR. USA

    replyreport
14. 80

    VioletSunposted 16 years ago

    Hi, Betty Jo: Welcome and thank you for sharing in Ripplemaker's tread. Yes, its refreshing finding people being nice. LOL!

    replyreport
15. 77

    ripplemakerposted 16 years ago

    Hi Betty Jo, nice of you to share something about yourself and how you value gratitude....today I woke up and thanked God that I was still alive...and my family too!  As I lay in bed, I could hear them move about the house.  And my nephew's voice ringing in the air.  Sounded so cheery.  It's very contagious. I had to smile.

    replyreport
16. 59

    NatalieTMposted 16 years ago

    Ripplemaker, you are an inspiration!
    
    (And actually, I've been inspired by EVERYONE who has posted here!)
    
    It truly is remarkable how your life improves when you focus on gratitude. I've caught myself being grateful for things that in the past I might have grumbled about!  Affirmations, questioning my conditioned thoughts, understanding the perfection in everything has become my default. 
    
    Connecting with people such as you is an important part of it all.
    
    Appreciatively,
    Natalie

    replyreport
17. 87

    stephhicks68posted 16 years ago

    Yes!!  This is so wonderful and such a great exercise.  When my husband and I tuck our children in at night, we tell each one of them - thank you for being my boy, or thank you for being my girl.  My middle son responds to me, "its not my fault - God gave me to you!"  How precious is that?
    
    I spent some special time with my grandfather last fall as he was nearing the end of his life, too.  Most of it was just sitting with him on his bed, stroking his hed and holding his hand.  He was completely aware of what was going on.  The last week, he couldn't speak, but I could.  I thanked him for his guidance, his support, but most of all for his love.  I miss him greatly, but I am at peace because I was able to have those conversations with him.  And I'll tell you what.... it has changed how I approach others in my life as well.  Even my emotionally distant mom.  I tell her I love her, even though it is hard to say.  I know she appreciates it.
    
    The lost art of a thank you note - handwritten, of course - and not emailed, is also a wonderful gift to find in the mailbox.  I sent out cards to everyone after Christmas, even my grandmother who did not give presents to anyone.  It was just a note to say thank you for sharing the holiday with us and to tell her that she is a special part of the family.
    
    Great forum topic!  Its good to keep appreciation in mind - especially with respect to those that matter most.  Steph

    replyreport
18. 59

    NatalieTMposted 16 years ago

    Oh, Steph, I loved reading how you spent time with your grandfather at the end of his life.
    
    I had the privilege of being with my step-father at the end of his life, then with my mother-in-law two months later.  There's really no experience that compares.
    
    Since then, I founded a company publishing picture books for elders based on my experience with people in this last developmental stage of life.  After 15 years as an early ed. teacher, I turned my attention to elders and found that his often forgotten segment of our population is in great need of connection with others and there are few tools available.  The focus tends towards dis-ease rather than celebration of a life well lived!
    
    There is such joy and wisdom to be experienced when we open our hearts to the people who paved the way for us!  It's almost an addiction....I can't seem to get enough time with these folks. 
    
    So here is a Thank You to all the elders who have enhanced life as we know it!
    
    Love,
    Natalie

    replyreport
19. 59

    Damolaposted 16 years ago

    Hello,your piont of view i must say is a sensitive one,thank you for making people realize the sense behing familyhood and those little things that we say can actually go a long way in hold ing a family together,really myself i have not much of being doing that,but ever since i lost my Dad i have ccome to the grips that my mom is all i have now,and at the slightest chance i ahve ,i make her realizee that she is not alone,and that i am still her with her.
                   Hope most people will realize that the family we ahve,makes us who we are tomorrow

    replyreport
20. 87

    stephhicks68posted 16 years ago

    Natalie,
    
    What a great way to honor your loved ones!  I loved reading about how your turned your early ed. experience around to elder care, and especially founding your publishing company!  How wonderful!  You are right - there is nothing like the experience of sharing time with a loved one at the end of his or her life.  It has changed me in many ways.
    
    All the best to you!
    
    Steph

    replyreport
21. 60

    CrystalSingletonposted 16 years ago

    This is for real. I'm the one in the family that friends and family always say is not very affectionate or they say that I have trouble expressing my feelings. I agree a lot with the whole touching thing. I don't know why I feel awkward hugging and saying thanks. I can say it without all the hand shaking and hugging. Although sometimes I feel I am going out of my way to say thanks just to show I can be a soft person. I am a very passionate person who is also very guarded and I guess I need to let that guard down and TELL people how much I do APPRECIATE them because I do. I guess my fear has misled people into thinking I am a cold person. Those who really know me though know my heart. Let's not get frivolous here. Over politeness is just fake and is easily spotted too. Great advice though.

    replyreport
22. 77

    ripplemakerposted 16 years ago

    Crystal, I guess expressions of love also depends on one's love language. I wrote a hub about this topic.  :-)  Anyhow, just curious...what is that you fear about letting your guard down? That's a pretty insightful observation.  And yes, there is definitely a big difference between genuine gratitude and fake politeness.  Thanks for sharing.
    
    Steph, welcome to the gratitude thread :-)  I see that you too have been blessed with your experience.   Isn't it just beautiful?

    replyreport
23. 64

    bloggerjbposted 16 years ago

    great post.  even simple things like cooking dinner i take for granted sometimes.  thanks for the reminder. 

    replyreport
24. 59

    Blogger Momposted 16 years ago

    Motherhood is often a thankless job.  I made sure as soon as my kids could talk that they learn to appreciate someone verbally - usually "Tank Too" in the early stages of talking, LOL.  Now my oldest (just turned 4 yesterday) is one of the politest boys on the block - to everyone, including other adults and kids.  I do remind him from time to time, but he is overall pretty polite.  It really does make a difference to hear someone thank you - in your heart you know they appreciate you, but sometimes you just need to hear it outloud.  My almost 3 year old daughter has trouble remembering to use her manners, and we don't allow "well, she's only 2" as an excuse.  I am constantly reminding her.  My 14 month old utters "Tan-Do" which I'm assuming means "thank you"?  Well, even if it doesn't, it's still nice to hear from him.
    
    Oh, and someone previously brought up handwritten thank you notes.  They are so quick and easy to drop in the mail - it's a wonder that more people don't do it.  I don't give gifts to receive the gratitude, but it's nice to hear that your gift was appreciated.
    
    Thanks for posting this, I loved reading the other responses!

    replyreport
    1. 77

       ripplemakerposted 16 years agoin reply to this

       Hi Blogger Mom, I was laughing when I read TANK TOO...reminds me of our kids in school.  You are right, motherhood is often a thankless job.  Last valentines day, I made sure I thanked Mom for all the love she has given us.  I could hear the delight in her voice when she called me.  Appreciation does work wonders.

       replyreport
25. 49

    strandedrose4386posted 15 years ago

    here is a new poem for america to gant there eyes at;on this being the day of wednesday sept.17,08 at 1;20pm in shattuck,oklahoma and  i am here typing you this live new pros;poem that will appear in my soon to be released poetry book called writings and poetry by a homeless women of norma jay bertrand the writer4386/international ambassador of poetry of the usa/10th time and it will be released in dec/08 in minnesota by publish today; and this is one of those such poems by me;if you have comments on this and the very next one;you can call me at my cell phone and theres at mine is;251-281-3445;email me at strandedrose4386@yahoo.com and title of this poem is on waylon jennings road;
    
    its off highways 84 and 54 west by waymores liquior store where west of lubbock,texas in a rural setting town called;littlefield,texas;
    set a life size mural of a country music famer singer waylon jennings face larger than life on the personal add board;look at it this way;hey america;the eagle himself may of flown with the angels and god to heaven;but his love is still flowing down here with his son shooter jennings who sings;his fan club which is at the waymore ice house and liquior store;with his brother mr jd jennings and his favorite neice ms.darla jennings;who appeared in the last known video of johnny cash video song of god gonna cut you down;but his fan club and waynes world on the internet is growing by leaps and bounds;his favorite neice darla is now a item of my son mister baby(e)trying to hook up with him;i have photos that will appear in my poetry book;on waylon jennings road;its where she works with her mom on a daily basis;cant miss her;its where his fond memories are stored;where the corn dont grow!down of at the major fair grounds where they have his festivals to honour him at;his face shines in a momument established in his legecy that never dies;of his gentle mans bride it can still be heard as if any of his musical brigade has all of his livable life;in the dark hills  below by norma jay writer4386 who goes to visit him quite often with mister baby(E) himself!on waylon jennings road; and this is in contest as we speak;

    replyreport
26. 49

    strandedrose4386posted 15 years ago

    here is a nother poem addition to the ones i posted already to up date you on me and mister baby(E) and its called in the spirit of elvis; and its all new and unique since i cant get to my other posts to write some more so look for me;ill be here for today only in the next few minutes; in the spirit of elvis presley the king of rock and roll;writtened by norma jay bertrand the writer4386;wednesday sept.17,08 at 1;35pm
    america! who is mister baby(E) asked his sister miss lisa marie who he visited recentally in a private setting alone and unshaparoned in graceland on elvis week;on the very last day no less in the hard rock cafe by souvenier shop;on sunday aug.17,08 at 7;00pm he met up with the women of his dreams he called her and they danced and hugged and talked;and i beleived they love every minute of it;to bad i norma jay wasnt quite invited but they met;according to mister baby(E) who took longer than usual when he claimed to be going to the bathroom;and he never came back to soon to the singing out side in the tent;he put every body in shock there;but since thenl;ha!america;who is mister baby(E) fans in north east texas guess what he was up here in your dirrection yes;he appeared two days in a row;some of you reconised him slightly;on wednesday sept 17,08 at 12;00pm he was seen in follet,texas off hwy 15 east for a little while in a little cafe drive in called his newest hang out panther cove drive in with his fan a waitress named oleta;its a great place to eat and the prices are reasonable go eat there;you'll  love the atmospheric conditions and he also sang in the essence of the spirit of elvis presley;to bad you werent there;he lives in texas no less;thru the acchievements of his brother and mentor;mr.asa landry the so called elvis impersonator every body loves to hear with the dixie darlings road show in the spirit of elvis tribute one night with you;and the real elvis is not     ;he lives thru the man himself;in cleveland,texas as well they were in hurricane ike and damaged up in crockett,texas weve talked recentally over what happened in the area;yes they are the family of who else mister baby(e) to whom you can call leave a voice mail;at asa landry mister baby(E)s brother who you in america never met;at 936-687-2451;if you want to book for a show you can at that number at talking to geena and tell i told you to call;they are that good;yet mister baby(E) was seen in shattuck,oklahoma as well today at the public library and on tuesday sept 16,08 he was present in shattuck oklahoma and beaver,oklahoma off hwy 270 west and then in texas state for a brief review and rest over in booker,texas at the local sante fe motel;in the spirit of the west who is the best of ever elvis aaron presley;he could be seen giving out autographs even i was present and gave a few myself;in follet texas today;its all in the spirit of elvis aaron presley the king of rock and roll;so get up and lets dance all over it again and again america;my problem is you werent here tho;hum america whats youre excuse;open plains and mountains live this is a hangout for us to take our break;we must not ever allowed his spirit to fall prey to country music;or die;cause i know elvis aaron presley himself is alive and his grave in graceland is empty and i can promise that soon it will be revealed at a later time;so again if you have comment on this call me lets chat;or call mister baby(E) for a show to appear at and thru me you can email me at strandedrose4386@yahoo.com and you can text mail me or call me dirrect at 251-281-3445 and to even sat up a show with his brother asa landry call him thru rageena at;936-687-2451;look for my book and order one and get it;

    replyreport
27. 49

    strandedrose4386posted 15 years ago

    i didnt cry writtened by norma jay bertrand the writer4386
    but i will not lye with you either;freind due to the fact;
    cus i norma jay bertrand writer 4386 never got a chance to see
    what you were like;to be exchanged for the next women you bagged
    down the neighborhood or road;i want hurt either;but i was blue due
    the memories you denied me of ! i didnt miss no one like you;cause
    you never came to explain the dissappearance act;or why?the uncertainity
    of youre unconscious name keeps popping up in the texas state
    bluest skies of rain;i didnt cry but i heard you making complaints in muenster ,texas last week in the city park to my son baby (E)think i wouldnt
    hear them amos berqueax;think i did;you sent me a miserable message
    you gonna kill me;in montague county;dont think so idiot;for what reasonable reason i ask!isnt you whos hiding behind his shallow mask of ignorance;yet who decides he can stalk me isnt that against the law should i report this sign to the fbi or cia this time;what are you doing out of your unprotected parolee web of tdcj prison refines again;freind;of nacogdoches county restraints;isnt that a crime punishable of a parole violation of jail resentencing;what a shame any how!but i felt this much from you okay!i felt your lies and pain of denial again and disownment of being dumped and of how i was in the victim in it all as usual;of you loosing the best thing next to heaven you ll never ever taste in full what do you want from me now;who me;ha try again;never every will i ever waste a single prayer of forgiveness i cant;you never loved me any how you used me like you mother threatened me by physical letter being turned in to the fbi as soon i get off of this;believe it;iwill not ever cry over your frenzy train collision of hate relinflating oh!are you trailing me now i m in athens,texas today and tomorow in palestine and by wednesday ill be in golaid,texas on tour;see you there pal;if you have a comment please email me at strandedrose4386@yahoo.com and or at this spot its welcomed and if you want to call or text mail me you can at 251-281-3445;this will be in my book soon to be released in dec/08 go out and buy you some and give it out for gifts but dont give one to amos;hes a looser;

    replyreport
28. 49

    strandedrose4386posted 15 years ago

    heres a new poem dedicated to all my friends in internet world;writtened by norma jay bertrand the writer 4386called the silent angel and it also goes out to reverend mr rocky alexander of the first church of god;in ira,texas and his imediate family who recentally lost a love one;in gold waithe,texas;
    
    theres a silent angel shes swarming around ira,texas these days! shes little bouts age 2;i believe;buts shes so weakened and frail! like yet her cousin rev mr rocky alexander sir;shes not in her grave;shes at home above safe and happy most of the time in heaven;right in our heavenly fathers presence;yet she is constanly missing her earthly family from time to town;
    she has always travels so quitely;back and forth in a hasey mist so we cannot see;with out a sound or sign only to gase as the silent angel!with a holy breeze;not forgetful or ungrateful;there is a silent angel amongst these;
    
    if you have a comment or want me to write you one call me at my cell phone at these numbers
    4090-767-1381 or at my alabama phone number;251-281-3445 or you can email me at my email site at strandedrose4386@yahoo.com other wise have  a great day okay! and look for my book up comming called writings and poems by a homeless women and it will be published by publish today a sudiary of poetry.com and it will be out soon and i hope if you will look for and purchase one and who knows you may catch me futher down the road one day;

    replyreport