Wear Out, Spread Out, Thin Out, and Growing Limp - Who gives a toss?
A friend of mine, who has recently turned 60, said that the thing he likes about being this age is that he no longer gives a toss what he looks like.
This is not strictly true because he's always well groomed, but I think what he was referring to is he no longer cares about things like lines and wrinkles, sagging jowls, thinning hairline and so on.
I'm not quite there yet. Difficulty maintaining weight, man boobs, and noticeable loosening of the skin (especially facial), are all relatively new to me, so acceptance of the inevitable is proving a little hard right now, even though I know i can't change it ;-)
So, any of you middle-aged guys (or gals if you want to chip in), who are reading this post and relating in some way, please tell what stage you're at, if indeed it's something you've even addressed?
As a geriatric nurse, I can assure you it's not an age, it's a state of mind. In my experience the older someone gets the "more" they get. If they were always a fastidious groomer, they'll be even more so, if they were lazy, they get lazier, if they were grouchy, they get grouchier. (But just my personal opinion, if my eyebrows got so long they started to mingle with my ear hair, I'd do something about it!!!) :-)
Since opening this topic I've been reading around the web and discovered a couple of things. Middle-aged men, in general, are obviously more concerned about aging and losing their libido than most would admit.
The testosterone replacement phenomenon is becoming as big a buzz as the Viagra phenomenon was all those years ago, and like Viagra, it seems that many are prepared to take HRT without consultation and just hope they don't suffer the potential harmful side effects.
For some reason the Serenity Prayer comes to mind here:
...grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.
Some aspects of aging take getting used to. Not easy to look in the mirror and see someone we don't recognize. But frantically trying to turn back the clock is to me the opposite of aging gracefully.
I agree with gmwilliams here. Strive to be fit and healthy so you feel and look your best. In the process you will end up looking and feeling younger than you are.
Can't speak to the funky clothes but think that by 50 we should have our own style that's not a slave to the latest fashions meant for 20-somethings.
Well said MM.
Sure, it's not nice to see noticeable changes in ageing, but at the end of the day it is both natural and just. This afternoon I'll be taking my usual daily hike through the mountain jungle, and although this does little to reverse the ageing process, it does a great deal towards making me feel good about myself, and isn't that what we all strive for – whatever the age?
I know a lovely gentleman who is in his early 80's and still is a total charmer and looks like a mafia boss in the best possible way. He is perfectly groomed and always wears a shirt and tie and is still a very handsome man (and I am in my early 40's and can recognise this).
My own Step Father is in his late 70's and rarely goes out without a shirt and tie on, is always extremely smart and very well groomed.
It is true that this must be a state of mind, because I don't believe growing old or getting beyond 60 is a reason to give up on looking good whichever sex you are.
I don't believe either of these men are concerned by wrinkles, (or in one case hair loss), and in my Step Dad's case he is still physically fitter than many men I know half his age (including my own Husband). I guess maybe it is true that you are only as young as you feel!
Even now my Step Father swims for about half an hour a day throughout the Summer and Autumn at his local bay, and again he can swim longer and further than most men I know. When he isn't swimming he is gardening or up a tree lopping off branches etc where required. It must come from being a retired Fire Chief I guess!
I'm only 45 and I totally could give a crap. Libido is a PITA. I hate being jerked around by my eyes, by my primate biology, and by the chick-dominated culture that invented PC thinking that would have me apologize for gaping at cleavage that chicks throw out there to lure my eyes with clothing that is not just revealing, but engineered with precision, long psychological study and unbridled expense. It's like having a Vegas hotel manager run out and call you a freak for standing there gaping at the spectacular fountain and water show they have going off in front of their establishment. What's wrong with you? It's just water, get over yourself.
Western culture, especially in America, has spent the last 60 years crapping on everything remotely male (from Fred Flinstone to Peter Griffin) and all I have to say to the OP is, F---- any woman who wants to bitch about your manboobs, your ear hair or your droopy wanker.
Be happy you are finally moving past being a slave to the biology that you were controlled by before and are still being penalized for these days. Your wank wilts, well, then you can finally get about your real purpose and stop being tugged about by the puppet strings of your libido that poor oppressed womanhood so despises as it paints its nails still and pays for tater-growth surgery, etc. Humanity stopped needing reproductive urges to keep it going somewhere around the 4 billion population mark. Probably sooner.
Yes, sex is fun. But lets be real. Women have been oppressing men for at least as long as men have been "oppressing" women. Someday both genders will start being honest at least. Maybe.
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